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Getbig Main Boards => Gossip & Opinions => Topic started by: nzmusclemonster on December 25, 2009, 06:58:33 PM

Title: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: nzmusclemonster on December 25, 2009, 06:58:33 PM
She's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty.

should I:

a) take a dump
b) take a dump and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump until after she has gone
d) take a dump on her chest
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: disturbia on December 25, 2009, 06:59:31 PM
She's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty.

should I:

a) take a dump

b) take a dump and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump until after she has gone
d) take a dump on her chest
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: benchmstr on December 25, 2009, 07:07:20 PM
make her sleep on the couch...while she is asleep take a dump on her.....by morning time she will have rolled around on it, and she will be covered from head to toe in shit, and she will think she did it..........then she will be at your mercy to keep her secret!!!

bench
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: calfzilla on December 25, 2009, 07:07:58 PM
B
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: grktownmuscle on December 25, 2009, 07:10:12 PM
he's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty.

should I:

a) take a dump
b) take a dump and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump until after he has gone
d) take a dump on her chest

fixed
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: myt1 on December 25, 2009, 07:13:54 PM
She's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty.

should I:

a) take a dump
b) take a dump and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump until after she has gone
d) take a dump on her chest

Actually, you did the perfect thing.......Post on Getbig, and wait for people to give me advice before taking action.

Wait an hour, and then let her know your predicament. You can make it a great topic of conversation by coming back to the thread, and looking at the appropriate action as decided by getbig.  Who knows, it may be the only way that you ever found out she was actually into having a dump taken on her chest.  lol

BTW, I vote for B.  C is a good option, but it could go terribly wrong.  See the BB.com thread :o
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: wolfgang187 on December 25, 2009, 07:15:52 PM
Take a dump on your welcome mat an slam the door in her face when she gets there.   
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: NaturalWonder83 on December 25, 2009, 07:17:04 PM
use the bathroom...wipe well...then turn your shower on and pour body wash and shampoo in the hot steamy water so it will cover up the smell.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Spike on December 25, 2009, 07:19:50 PM
is she banging you in the ass??

you guys need to start using wet tiolet paper - cleans ass like no other

(http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51JxKvIHOLL._SL500_AA280_.jpg)
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: BIG ACH on December 25, 2009, 07:24:20 PM

Take the dump man!!!  You will have problems if she tries to get it on and you are holding it in!

I once passed on a potentially incredible blow job / sex because I needed to dump out what seemed like a fucking 18 wheeler!


Moral of the story always take a dump if there is a chance of sex!
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: ToxicAvenger on December 25, 2009, 07:27:58 PM
(http://static-resources.goodguide.com/images/entities/all/279800.jpg)

i actually carry a pack with me at ALL times....

anything less is fucking disgusting...
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: disturbia on December 25, 2009, 07:34:02 PM
Actually, you did the perfect thing.......Post on Getbig, and wait for people to give me advice before taking action.

Wait an hour, and then let her know your predicament. You can make it a great topic of conversation by coming back to the thread, and looking at the appropriate action as decided by getbig.  Who knows, it may be the only way that you ever found out she was actually into having a dump taken on her chest.  lol

BTW, I vote for B.  C is a good option, but it could go terribly wrong.  See the BB.com thread :o

ahahhahahahah

Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: 240 is Back on December 25, 2009, 07:36:09 PM
Moral of the story is - if there is a chance you'll be naked and alone with a female, you should adjust your diet for the 4 or 5 hours ahead of that.

If I know a girl is stopping over at 10 pm after getting out of work, etc... I will eat a garden salad with chicken breast and dressing at 5 pm.  I will skip the evening protein shake, then opt for applesauce and something light at 730 or 8.  

Plan on being able to snack if yall go out, or maintain your game until you get laid.  Then have your steak and eggs.  

Worst/Best date I ever had... I ate a cheeseburger and fries and the girl calls me outta nowhere.  I take her to movie, and I gotta go afterwards.  She didn't want to go home, she wanted to go to beach.  Still no potty for me.  Then we went to this bike park and stayed there all night, making out and having sex two times.  no bathroom there either.  I left car to pee to relieve pressure, but had to do it twice with the baby turtle peeking out.

I got home at 7 am... incredible night - but my belly hurt for the whole day.  Smuggling a turd for 10+ hours + sex.... ouch.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: gordiano on December 25, 2009, 07:41:39 PM
(http://static-resources.goodguide.com/images/entities/all/279800.jpg)

i actually carry a pack with me at ALL times....

anything less is fucking disgusting...

I hear ya, man. I use these myself...Costco carries 'em. Unlike Baby wipes, these are flush-able.


(http://ladiapers.com/cottonelle_fresh_flushable_moist_wipes.jpg)
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Flexb on December 25, 2009, 07:41:54 PM
E -- shoot yourself
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Julio Ceasar on December 25, 2009, 08:00:34 PM
I once had a girl for a visit. And I had some problem with farting like every 5-10 minute. Damn it was a hell that night! Had to keep em in every time and let some small amount out calm and quiet while sitting in the couch. And i was going to the toilet more than once that night pretending that I have to pie while I was separating my ass to get soundless farts :D. Jesus, that day was a living hell!
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: chaos on December 25, 2009, 08:04:53 PM
is she banging you in the ass??

you guys need to start using wet tiolet paper - cleans ass like no other

(http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51JxKvIHOLL._SL500_AA280_.jpg)
(http://static-resources.goodguide.com/images/entities/all/279800.jpg)

i actually carry a pack with me at ALL times....

anything less is fucking disgusting...
I hear ya, man. I use these myself...Costco carries 'em. Unlike Baby wipes, these are flush-able.


(http://ladiapers.com/cottonelle_fresh_flushable_moist_wipes.jpg)
Outed.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Flexb on December 25, 2009, 08:05:09 PM
I just let them fly. Chicks respect a guy that's confident enough to fart at will  :D
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Azn Muscle on December 25, 2009, 08:06:29 PM
You better take that dump before he gets there because when he bends you over there will be no turning back then.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: WillGrant on December 25, 2009, 10:29:59 PM
She's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty.

should I:

a) take a dump
b) take a dump and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump until after she has gone
d) take a dump on her chest
Do this bro..

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hot+chili+dog (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hot+chili+dog)


Quote
Chili Dog Diet   
 Is when a guy shits (the chili) between a womans breast (the buns), and the guy sticks his cock (the hot dog) in the shit and proceeds to titty fuck her as she sucks the tip of his dick at the same time, eating the shit (the diet). Hence, the "Chili Dog Diet".
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Meso_z on December 26, 2009, 03:29:36 AM
She's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty.

should I:

a) take a dump
b) take a dump and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump until after she has gone
d) take a dump on her chest

leave you computer asshole and go take a dump.  ::)
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Fatpanda on December 26, 2009, 03:41:03 AM
great thread  ::)
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Tapeworm on December 26, 2009, 03:46:36 AM
The romance is gone now.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: WillGrant on December 26, 2009, 03:48:22 AM
The romance is gone now.
And hopefully the poo has been flushed
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Gino30 on December 26, 2009, 03:53:53 AM
fuck sake dude......take a dump and have a shower......she might lick you ass
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: outby43 on December 26, 2009, 04:19:12 AM
fuck sake dude......take a dump and have a shower......she might lick you ass

I would refuse to be with a chick that licked my ass (past that one night of course).  No telling how many asses she plunged her tongue in.

Fucking gross.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: wes on December 26, 2009, 04:24:47 AM
whatever you do,just be sure not to leave home without your pee bottle!!
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: affeman on December 26, 2009, 04:25:30 AM
Take the dump but neither flush down nor wipe ur ass.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Mr Nobody on December 26, 2009, 04:41:20 AM
She's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty.

should I:

a) take a dump
b) take a dump and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump until after she has gone
d) take a dump on her chest
Definately d) then make her cleanup the mess, this will draw her closer to you.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: _bruce_ on December 26, 2009, 05:59:00 AM
Just ask her to open her mouth...
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: ToxicAvenger on December 26, 2009, 06:20:07 AM
I hear ya, man. I use these myself...Costco carries 'em. Unlike Baby wipes, these are flush-able.


(http://ladiapers.com/cottonelle_fresh_flushable_moist_wipes.jpg)

finally..someone else...i carry em around in my book bag and my study partner gets embrassed when i take em out at star bucks as i head to the WC...but fuck i dont care...sometimes people stare but i stare right back with the " yeah thats right.....i'm better than you" look
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: chadstallion on December 26, 2009, 06:52:19 AM
She's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty.

should I:

a) take a dump
b) take a dump and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump until after she has gone
d) take a dump on her chest

as long as she's not using a strap -on to butt f$ck you, you're safe.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: indie-lad on December 26, 2009, 08:27:47 AM
I would refuse to be with a chick that licked my ass (past that one night of course).  No telling how many asses she plunged her tongue in.

Fucking gross.

Actually a girl licking my ass and is fucking hot as hell turns me on big time! I love girls tongues and the thought of them deep in my ass drives me nuts! Many girls are not into it but I've had much success convincing them to do it for me especially when their crazy about you at the time (when you get them to this level, anything is possible). I love it because there is something so dirty about it (figurative and literally). Even when I wasn't so clean down there I still make them do it. God, I love it! My X said to me one time that I smelled like onions down in my privates and still she licked me clean...good times!! :)
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: affeman on December 26, 2009, 08:40:29 AM
She's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty.

should I:

a) take a dump
b) take a dump and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump until after she has gone
d) take a dump on her chest

What path have you finally chosen, sheepfucker?? Keep us updated!
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Bobby on December 26, 2009, 08:43:34 AM
I once had a girl for a visit. And I had some problem with farting like every 5-10 minute. Damn it was a hell that night! Had to keep em in every time and let some small amount out calm and quiet while sitting in the couch. And i was going to the toilet more than once that night pretending that I have to pie while I was separating my ass to get soundless farts :D. Jesus, that day was a living hell!

 ;D
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: OneMoreRep on December 26, 2009, 10:31:06 AM

I got home at 7 am... incredible night - but my belly hurt for the whole day.  Smuggling a turd for 10+ hours + sex.... ouch.

Double stimulation!

"1"
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Method101 on December 26, 2009, 10:41:42 AM
does she like to lick your asshole? whats the problem.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Special Ed on December 26, 2009, 10:48:50 AM
She's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty: should I:

a) take a dump wash my vagina
b) take a dump wash my vagina and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump don't wash my vagina until after she he has gone
d) take a dump on her chest
fixed.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: calfzilla on December 26, 2009, 10:56:34 AM
I don't take dumps.  My body uses all of my protein to build muscle on my massive physique.  Haven't taken a shit since I was 15. 
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Mr Nobody on December 26, 2009, 11:31:34 AM
I don't take dumps.  My body uses all of my protein to build muscle on my massive physique.  Haven't taken a shit since I was 15. 
LMAO :D
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: FitnessFrenzy on December 26, 2009, 11:38:19 AM
Moral of the story is - if there is a chance you'll be naked and alone with a female, you should adjust your diet for the 4 or 5 hours ahead of that.

If I know a girl is stopping over at 10 pm after getting out of work, etc... I will eat a garden salad with chicken breast and dressing at 5 pm.  I will skip the evening protein shake, then opt for applesauce and something light at 730 or 8.  

Plan on being able to snack if yall go out, or maintain your game until you get laid.  Then have your steak and eggs.  

Worst/Best date I ever had... I ate a cheeseburger and fries and the girl calls me outta nowhere.  I take her to movie, and I gotta go afterwards.  She didn't want to go home, she wanted to go to beach.  Still no potty for me.  Then we went to this bike park and stayed there all night, making out and having sex two times.  no bathroom there either.  I left car to pee to relieve pressure, but had to do it twice with the baby turtle peeking out.

I got home at 7 am... incredible night - but my belly hurt for the whole day.  Smuggling a turd for 10+ hours + sex.... ouch.

be a man.. tell the girl you need to take a dump. Mars would have taken a dump right on the beach in front of her. That's how macho he is.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Alex23 on December 26, 2009, 11:47:29 AM
fixed.

failed.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Team Diver on December 26, 2009, 12:08:34 PM
hilarious thread.  :D
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: BIG ACH on December 26, 2009, 12:36:17 PM

I had to perorm once RIGHT after eating a whoel tub of Ben & Jerrys ice cream, it was so fucking hard to stay focused!
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: nzmusclemonster on January 03, 2010, 05:19:48 PM
What path have you finally chosen, sheepfucker?? Keep us updated!

I took a dump but no shower afterwards.

It was great. Lots of positions used, so lucky I took a dump because one of the positions could have potentially squeezed mr turd out.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: che on January 03, 2010, 05:40:35 PM
potentially squeezed mr turd out.

Outed
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: nzmusclemonster on January 03, 2010, 05:44:32 PM
I had to perorm once RIGHT after eating a whoel tub of Ben & Jerrys ice cream, it was so fucking hard to stay focused!

The best sex I ever had was after going to an all you can eat pizza hut. I was a machine  8)
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: chaos on January 03, 2010, 06:01:14 PM
Actually a girl licking my ass and is fucking hot as hell turns me on big time! I love girls tongues and the thought of them deep in my ass drives me nuts! Many girls are not into it but I've had much success convincing them to do it for me especially when their crazy about you at the time (when you get them to this level, anything is possible). I love it because there is something so dirty about it (figurative and literally). Even when I wasn't so clean down there I still make them do it. God, I love it! My X said to me one time that I smelled like onions down in my privates and still she licked me clean...good times!! :)
Fag.


Outed.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: HTexan on January 03, 2010, 06:44:23 PM
B., you nasty fuck.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Spike on January 04, 2010, 08:30:47 AM
Actually a girl licking my ass and is fucking hot as hell turns me on big time! I love girls tongues and the thought of them deep in my ass drives me nuts! Many girls are not into it but I've had much success convincing them to do it for me especially when their crazy about you at the time (when you get them to this level, anything is possible). I love it because there is something so dirty about it (figurative and literally). Even when I wasn't so clean down there I still make them do it. God, I love it! My X said to me one time that I smelled like onions down in my privates and still she licked me clean...good times!! :)

x2


hahaha - onions? you must be middle eastern? no?
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: V Man on January 04, 2010, 09:36:03 AM
Wait until she gets there, then ask her if she's into scat. If she says no, politely excuse yourself to the bathroom.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: dov on January 04, 2010, 11:59:13 AM
She's here in about 15 mins... i am worried that it might be a messy dump and put me off having sex as I would feel dirty.

should I:

a) take a dump
b) take a dump and then have a shower
c) don't take a dump until after she has gone
d) take a dump on her chest
"Cleveland Steamer"
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: indie-lad on January 04, 2010, 06:35:34 PM
x2


hahaha - onions? you must be middle eastern? no?

No, Spanish and Sicilian. But I hadn't showered for two days so it turned me on even more when she did her job :)
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Fatpanda on March 09, 2010, 02:56:38 PM
No, Spanish and Sicilian. But I hadn't showered for two days so it turned me on even more when she did her job :)

filthy bitch !
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: dov on March 09, 2010, 02:59:21 PM
No, Spanish and Sicilian. But I hadn't showered for two days so it turned me on even more when she did her job :)
Gawwwwdamn u is one nasty m^th$rFu#ker! Gotta be some the mostest disgustings shitz me even hear!
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Immortal_Technique on March 09, 2010, 03:48:48 PM
failed.

fixed
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Lurker79 on March 09, 2010, 07:01:36 PM
pics or it didn't happen.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: sync pulse on March 09, 2010, 07:05:13 PM
By all means,...go to the toilet NOW but wash your anus with soap and water...Then open the bathroom window for positive ventilation...you will be good to go.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Spoony Luv on March 09, 2010, 09:01:30 PM
Ok even though this was 3 months ago I'll play along...Take a dumb and put it in a plastic baggy...Then throw it in your freezer...If you gives you any kind of attitude at all tonight. Throw the baggy in her purse as she goes out the door...Good times
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: pugalist666 on March 10, 2010, 04:35:53 AM
Ok even though this was 3 months ago I'll play along...Take a dumb and put it in a plastic baggy...Then throw it in your freezer...If you gives you any kind of attitude at all tonight. Throw the baggy in her purse as she goes out the door...Good times
no , alaska pipe line that bitch
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: aglifter on March 11, 2010, 02:39:21 PM
Just go ahead and take a dump.  We all know you're not getting any... so it really doesn't matter.
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: nzmusclemonster on April 24, 2010, 07:15:36 PM
By all means,...go to the toilet NOW but wash your anus with soap and water...Then open the bathroom window for positive ventilation...you will be good to go.

what sort of anus washing technique should I employ?

Towel? hand? also, would you suggest I penetrate a cm or 2 for extra cleanliness?
Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: webcake on April 24, 2010, 07:19:06 PM
jesus nzmm...........it's been 4 months and you still haven't taken a dump yet. Somethintg tells me this bitch isn't coming over.

Title: Re: Got a girl coming over and I really need a dump
Post by: Mr Nobody on April 24, 2010, 07:52:43 PM
jesus nzmm...........it's been 4 months and you still haven't taken a dump yet. Somethintg tells me this bitch isn't coming over.


:D