I know this post makes me sound like I am being a dick, but don't make yourself out to be WAY more than you are or can live up to. I am just using TJ as an example, (he is a very good bodybuilder but I know he is not the greatest, and he will also be the first to tell he has a long way to go) to show how it is just not in the cards for you. You really make our self look like a fool by trying build yourself up like this! Anyone who really knows bodybuilding can see you are at best a state level bodybuilder.
"Don't fear the dog that barks, fear the dog that doesn't bark"