ladies please explain this chick to me

[tu_holmes]

I didn't try to get a date with her or anything with her being in another state now.  I just said hello and apologized for ignoring her back then.  Why can't she atleast say something back?

Because that's how women are... They are just "different".

No crime in saying so.

[knny187]

Obviously she has moved on but I can't imagine her forgetting me, lets not forget she is looking at my pics on myspace.  I am 24 and we had no conversation.  Like i said this girl just couldn't seem to keep her eyes off of me.  Trust me i'm always pessimistic when a girl talks to me or look at me.  I'm not the type that thinks "she glanced my way once or twice she must like me" she did it far too often for her to not have some sort of interest.  If she wanted to just flirt with me than why didn't she say anything?  Why would she jump on to that wall?  Why would she smile at me numerous times without knowing me, even when i didn't smile at her once?  Why did she stare at me like a deer caught in headlights numerous times?  Why did she seem to try and make me jealous after I ignored her when she was on the wall?   It was after that when she would stare at me like the deer caught in headlights, she only did it once before this incident.  Why did she stare at me like she wanted to cry when she last saw me.  Also another time I didn't mention she stared at me like a tiger about to attack it's prey when I walked by her when she was sitting in the hallways one time.  That was before she would've felt rejected by me.  I never stared at her or smiled at her once, i was too insecure to do that. For her to just have been trying to get me to give her some kind of attention after all of those things she would be beyond crazy and needs serious mental help. 

So....she just stared at you?

To me....that was not enough.  Maybe you were just entertaining....& now she's over it.


Honestly...she was 20 at the time?  Do you realize how many 20 year old girls (or around that age) that know what they really want?  Three years later...she might find you repulsive...seriously.

Staring is not enough.....sorry.

How many times did you stare at a girl....liked her so much that you just went up & talked to her?

or

How many times have you seen a girl walk up to a guy?


Thats what usually happens when someone likes somebody.  Just sitting there staring at you is really not enough.

[knny187]

Also if she is dumb enough to actually have forgotten me I would think that I refreshed her memory with my pics and me bringing up the time she jumped on to the wall.  How do you forget a guy snubbing you in front of your girl friends?  It was a small school with less than 2000 people.  I basically saw the same people every day and i'm sure it was the same for her. 

When did you bring up the time she jumped on to the wall?

On her myspace account?

[Wanocki]

So....she just stared at you?

To me....that was not enough.  Maybe you were just entertaining....& now she's over it.


Honestly...she was 20 at the time?  Do you realize how many 20 year old girls (or around that age) that know what they really want?  Three years later...she might find you repulsive...seriously.

Staring is not enough.....sorry.

How many times did you stare at a girl....liked her so much that you just went up & talked to her?

or

How many times have you seen a girl walk up to a guy?


Thats what usually happens when someone likes somebody.  Just sitting there staring at you is really not enough.

But she stared so many times all throughout the semester.  There was one time early in the semester about a week after she first saw me she said something.  I was standing against a wall staring down at people just walking down the stairs.  She walked by and gave me a big smile and stood about 5 feet from where I was.  I looked away quickly being the gutless turd that I am and then when i looked back she was staring at me.  SHe said "so is this the cool place to stand."  I said something like "uh yeah it's a nice place to stand just watching people go by."  When I said this she was slightly smiling looking at the ground.  She then said "I just want to see someone trip and fall" and she just smiled but wasn't making eye contact with me.  Then some guy friend of hers came by and she started complaining to him about some teacher of hers.  I didn't bring that up before because I never took it as a big sign of interest, she seemed like the type that made conversations with people.  I thought the deer in headlights stare was much more of a sign.

I don't know how I could've been entertaining.  I appeared more muscular at the time when in clothes but reallly I was just overbulked.  The average person thought it was muscle but it was alot of fat.  Looking at pictures of me back then i can't imagine she would think i looked better (chubby face) and I don't see any overbulked guys on her myspace friends list.  Despite the possibility of her thinking i'm disgusting now, I would think she would atleast say something back.

And she did walk up to me in a way, remember I said she jumped up on to that wall with her girl friends standing by and I snubbed her.  Also I think she did more than what girls normally do when they like a guy.  From what i've seen girls give signs and the guy sees the signs then he approaches.  I don't know any guy that actually had a girl ask him out.  The guy initated everything.

[Wanocki]

When did you bring up the time she jumped on to the wall?

On her myspace account?

When I sent her the private message on myspace.  I said there was a time when she jumped onto a wall that I was sitting by and I didn't say anything because I had a girlfriend.  I apologized to her for completely ignoring her and said I wanted to say something but it didn't feel right due to my girlfriend at the time.

thanks for contributing to this thread btw

[Deedee]

Maybe she has moved on and doesn't want to be reminded of that time. Maybe it was humiliating to be ignored. It's possible that if you made references to ignoring her, not responding etc in your last note to her... she may have been reminded of how you insulted her.    Could be a simple case of payback. Maybe you should have just gone the "hi how are you, remember me?" route and not gone into details of the past. Could also be that she has a whole new life and doesn't want to go back in time. Maybe, even though she's single... is dating someone and thinks you're making a play.

I think you should just forget about her and move on.

[Wanocki]

Maybe she has moved on and doesn't want to be reminded of that time. Maybe it was humiliating to be ignored. It's possible that if you made references to ignoring her, not responding etc in your last note to her... she may have been reminded of how you insulted her.    Could be a simple case of payback. Maybe you should have just gone the "hi how are you, remember me?" route and not gone into details of the past. Could also be that she has a whole new life and doesn't want to go back in time. Maybe, even though she's single... is dating someone and thinks you're making a play.

I think you should just forget about her and move on.

I thought it would be a possibility of me bringing back a possible painful and disappointing past.  I just didn't know how to go about sending the message.  I really wasn't sure if she would remember me if I just said "hey how are you" and not much else with me looking thinner in my pics and her not knowing my name.

Yeah she has a whole new life in a different state and yeah i'm sure she is dating but she isn't in a exclusive relationship.  I told her I wanted to communicate with her, with her being in a different state she shouldn't think that I'm making a play.  I don't know why she just can't say something.  I even said if you don't want to talk to me just say you don't want to talk to me, still no response.

thanks for the input

[knny187]

When I sent her the private message on myspace.  I said there was a time when she jumped onto a wall that I was sitting by and I didn't say anything because I had a girlfriend.  I apologized to her for completely ignoring her and said I wanted to say something but it didn't feel right due to my girlfriend at the time.

thanks for contributing to this thread btw

again dude....

3 letters....

TMI

(to much information)

Just should have say "hi....do you rmember me...we went to school together"

Left it as that.


Anyways...I don't want to sound like I'm repeating the same thing over & over...but I almost feel you like her more than she liked you.  I will be that she wasn't 'staring' at you like you thought she was or you had in your own mind...made it more than it was.

just let it go.

I don't see one person on here that has said..."keep going for it"

[24KT]

Dude, I don't know you from Adam, ...but just reading your posts on the subject is creeping me out.
I'm not trying to be mean, that's just the impression I'm getting ...like chewing gum stuck to your shoe.

My best advice, let it go and move on, ...before restraining orders become a part of your future..

[Wanocki]

again dude....

3 letters....

TMI

(to much information)

Just should have say "hi....do you rmember me...we went to school together"

Left it as that.


Anyways...I don't want to sound like I'm repeating the same thing over & over...but I almost feel you like her more than she liked you.  I will be that she wasn't 'staring' at you like you thought she was or you had in your own mind...made it more than it was.

just let it go.

I don't see one person on here that has said..."keep going for it"

Yeah I guess I over did it in the message.  I mentioned that to refresh her memory in case she didn't recognize me in the pics.  I don't think it was all in my mind or anything.  No other girl in my lifetime did anywhere near the amount of stuff she did, atleast when it came to girls I didn't know.  If I liked her more than she liked me than why did she come to me? I didn't go to her, didn't smile at her, and didn't stare at her.  She did those things.  I'm the type that goes for girls that like me, i was never turned on by girls that ignore me.  I probably overrate her only becuase she gave me alot of signs of interest.  If she didn't do any of those things I would hardly ever think of her.

[Wanocki]

Dude, I don't know you from Adam, ...but just reading your posts on the subject is creeping me out.
I'm not trying to be mean, that's just the impression I'm getting ...like chewing gum stuck to your shoe.

My best advice, let it go and move on, ...before restraining orders become a part of your future..

I was worried about that but I would think that she would've put her profile on private if I creeped her out.  In the message I sent her I even mentioned that I was sorry if my message weirded her out.

[knny187]

Yeah I guess I over did it in the message.  I don't think it was all in my mind or anything.  No other girl in my lifetime did anywhere near the amount of stuff she did, atleast when it came to girls I didn't know.  If I liked her more than she liked me than why did she come to me? I didn't go to her, didn't smile at her, and didn't stare at her.  I'm the type that goes for girls that like me, i was never turned on by girls that ignore me.  I probably overrate her only becuase she gave me alot of signs of interest.  If she didn't do any of those things I would hardly ever think of her.

you're like the person that see's a cute puppy in the window & the puppy is all excited to see you wagging it's tail & all.  You go home...realize the puppy is something you must have, but by the time you return...it's gone.

I've come to a point in my life.....if I second guess something....I really didn't want it.  I may feel like it when it's gone...but it's the feeling of not having it...not really wanting it. 

[Wanocki]

you're like the person that see's a cute puppy in the window & the puppy is all excited to see you wagging it's tail & all.  You go home...realize the puppy is something you must have, but by the time you return...it's gone.

I've come to a point in my life.....if I second guess something....I really didn't want it.  I may feel like it when it's gone...but it's the feeling of not having it...not really wanting it. 

The only reason I second guessed myself back then is because I had a girlfriend.  I always liked her but I got the impression that she liked me more than I liked her.  That actually increased my attraction toward her.  Growing up I didn't get chicks so playing hard to get didn't work for me.  I'm thinking maybe I should try and friend her on Myspace.  If she doesn't friend me I'll let it go and assume she doesn't like me for whatever reason.

[24KT]

Wanocki, where do you live? ...and would you ever consider relocating to London?
There might even be a girl there who's just PUUUURRRFECT for you. It could even be a match made in heaven?

[Wanocki]

Wanocki, where do you live? ...and would you ever consider relocating to London?
There might even be a girl there who's just PUUUURRRFECT for you. It could even be a match made in heaven?

Ohio, why do you say this? 

[24KT]

Ohio, why do you say this? 

I was hoping you lived in London. 

[Eyeball Chambers]

sorry but i'm sure soembody here would send her the link to this thread

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH That would be sooooooooooooooooo funnny! 

[Faust]

Like Deedee already said, you blew it by apologizing/explaining.
Makes you look weak, women are NOT attracted to it, and it wasn't even necessary in this case. You've given her the impression that you were an asshole and she's been hurt by you. In reality you did nothing wrong.

You should have started with something casual/original and went from there.

[Wanocki]

Damn I guess I should've asked for advice before I sent her the message.  My original thinking was she might not recognize me from the pics so I felt I should explain how we knew each other.  In my mind just sending her a message that only contained the words "hey how's it going we used to go to school together" would've been weird.  I thought that would've confused her more and would've made her less likly to respond thinking it was just some random myspace guy sending her a message.  I felt I should apologize because I really felt like I did something wrong but yeah unfortunately some people do see it as weakness when someone admits to being wrong.  My goal wasn't to get with her, I knew that wasn't realistic at this point and I made that clear to her.  I just wanted to communicate with her.  I'm thinking of maybe trying to friend her on Myspace.  If she doesn't accept I'll move on and forget about it.   

[knny187]

Damn I guess I should've asked for advice before I sent her the message.  My original thinking was she might not recognize me from the pics so I felt I should explain how we knew each other.  In my mind just sending her a message that only contained the words "hey how's it going we used to go to school together" would've been weird.  I thought that would've confused her more and would've made her less likly to respond thinking it was just some random myspace guy sending her a message.  I felt I should apologize because I really felt like I did something wrong but yeah unfortunately some people do see it as weakness when someone admits to being wrong.  My goal wasn't to get with her, I knew that wasn't realistic at this point and I made that clear to her.  I just wanted to communicate with her.  I'm thinking of maybe trying to friend her on Myspace.  If she doesn't accept I'll move on and forget about it.   

yeah...or just stop & put a little more thought & little less words into it

[Wanocki]

I just went with what I felt was right.  My gut feeling.  It's easy to say now that I should've done things differently but maybe nothing would've worked.

[Wanocki]

I just watched Inside Edition.  There was a story about a man who was in alcoholics anonymous and he got to step 8 or 9 where you have to apologize to every person that you felt you did something wrong to in life.  He raped a girl 20 years ago in college and sent the girl a letter apologizing.  The girl didn't accept the apology at all and took the letter to the police.  That guy is now going away for a few years.  Not that me ignoring a girl compares to rape but it just goes to show that saying "I'm sorry" doesn't make people forgive you if you hurt them in any way.

[knny187]

ah.....I am going on a limb here.....but you don't get a lot of girls.....do you?



question....last girlfriend you had.....

(1) how long were you together?
(2) why did you break up?

[24KT]

You actually think the hurt a woman feels over being ignored is in any way shape or form comparable to that which she experiences from being raped? You're an idiot!  

[michael arvilla]

Stalker................. ........................ ........................ ........................ ..........alert