Good
1) I'm from a rich family and have been given a lot of money by my dad.
2) I lost 50 pounds the past 5 years, now I'm in the "healthy weight" range. Very proud of this. 185 pounds to 135 pounds.
3) I exercise an hour a day, 6 days a week, consistently for the past 5 years with only minor breaks and few missed workouts. I like that discipline and commitment that I have shown.
4) I am a good person with a good heart I genuinely believe.
5) I'm cheap and frugal and live way below my means. I spend roughly half of the interest my money generates and let the other half compound with the principal.
6) When I'm sufficiently occupied during the day listening to Howard Stern, watching TV, working out, playing video games and online checkers, listening to music, downloading stuff off the net, reading forums, watching porn and masturbating, I am happy and my life is an absolute heaven. But there's always that period every day when I feel extremely lonely and sad and ugly and short and unloved and unlovable and that I will be alone forever.
Bad
1) I'm short. 5'5". I expecially hate this. If only I was taller I would feel better about myself. Practically every girl wants a guy taller than her. Heck even 4'11 broads want a 6' guy to feel "secure". Probably 90% of the market eliminated right there. I also feel like a complete douchebag when speaking to someone 6'4 and up, I feel like a 5 year old.
2) I'm ugly. Big nose, big ears, my face is a disaster. I see the ugliest person in the world when I look in the mirror. Strong self loathing.
3) I have no "game" with women.
4) I have low self esteem.
5) I have no friends. Partly because I'm afraid people will try to steal my money. I have a hard time trusting anyone after my father told me some bad experiences he had with people that he trusted, so I tend to stay away from people. My father's motto is "don't trust anybody". He has no friends and neither do I. But at least he has a hot new wife (stepmom) who actually likes him and not his money, and prenup protection.
6) I don't trust people and I am a recluse.
7) I find it hard to "care" about people or do charity work. I know most people are utter scumbags if given the opportunity to show their true colors and if the shoe was on the other foot and roles reversed and I was the one that needed the handout charity, they would probably show me middle fingers and spit in my face. I used to do things for people because it brought me some kind of joy, then I see what appens, no good deed goes unpunished, people are generally ungrateful, after that happened enough these days my motto is "to each his own" I don't ask you for anything you don't ask me for anything. I also think it's a joke people want to save animals... lock yourself with a lion in a room and see what it does to you. I will not care for something or someone that doesn't give a damn about me.
I've never asked a girl out and don't gave a girlfriend. I dress like some idiot so they don't even know I have money. Plus I don't really want a gold digger in my life, I don't want to support some evil girl who just wants my money. I want real love, I want to love and be loved back for who I am not what I have, I want sex, I am a good guy darn it I deserve it. Maybe I should just bite the bullet and go bang a hooker or 20 but that just seems so demeaning I would loathe myself even more if I did that.
So there.. my life.
Discuss and advise. Thank you.
