Author Topic: Funny questions you get on lifting...  (Read 2825 times)

Croatch

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Funny questions you get on lifting...
« on: April 13, 2007, 11:09:31 PM »
I used to be modest and reply with a normal comment, but now I'm just a clown when someone asks me about lifting.

How much you bench?
pause....look at the person....proceed with, "More than you."

So, how is the working out going?
pause...look at yourself...proceed with, "I'd say pretty damn good." then laugh at what a beast you are.

Once asked by the grocery store lady, they always have something to say when they see 6 dozen eggs and pounds of chicken.
Boy, I guess eggs are good for you?
"Apparently...yeah." in an egotistic manner.  Women love that shit...haha ::)

The funniest things about when people ask me something, I wonder why I don't give a shit if they're fat, so why do they care I'm in shape.  It seems to bring out peoples insecurities bigtime.  Not everyone who asks you something feels this way and may have a genuine "short term" interest in how you get that way, then go back to eating Twinkies on their break.  It's some funny stuff.
List some you may have and comments you've made.  I need some new artillery.
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whitewidow

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #1 on: April 13, 2007, 11:11:38 PM »
HAHAHA> nobody says that to you toothpick. you ballbreaker you!

Croatch

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #2 on: April 13, 2007, 11:43:17 PM »
Quote
HAHAHA> nobody says that to you toothpick. you ballbreaker you!
What's up lover.  Haven't heard from you in a while.  No more brilliant PM's?  Don't worry, I'll be back in NY soon enough.
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Bluto

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #3 on: April 13, 2007, 11:49:42 PM »
"still posting on getbig eh?" when they see my well developed fingers
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Croatch

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #4 on: April 13, 2007, 11:50:27 PM »
Quote
"still posting on getbig eh?" when they see my well developed fingers
I said funny though.
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Bluto

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #5 on: April 13, 2007, 11:52:10 PM »
I said funny though.

like your 12 year old "tits are cool" avatars?
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progressiv_anatomy

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #6 on: April 14, 2007, 12:00:38 AM »
Boy, I have had alot of fun with snappy comebacks.

How much you bench?

"I dont bench"  This leaves alot of people speechless.

One time a black man in his 50s or so asked me, "What you drivin' (bench)?"  I told him a Mitsubishi, and pointed at my truck.

Do you lift weights?

"No, I do jumping jacks"

"No, I use the thighmaster"

"Im sweatin' to the oldies!"

Do you take steroids?

I like to answer this one with a question.

"Do you swallow?"

"Are your tits real?"

"Are you a homosexual?  'Cause you look like you suck dick"

"Do you eat porkchops?"

This is all I can come up with right now.  I know I have more, but its late.

Croatch

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #7 on: April 14, 2007, 12:03:37 AM »
Quote
like your 12 year old "tits are cool" avatars?
Again no, that isn't really funny either.  Hate to burst your bubble, but many grown men feel the same way.  Boobs are fun, that's just how it is.
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Bluto

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #8 on: April 14, 2007, 12:04:29 AM »
Again no, that isn't really funny either.  Hate to burst your bubble, but many grown men feel the same way.  Boobs are fun, that's just how it is.

boobs are, avatars of it are not.
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Croatch

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #9 on: April 14, 2007, 12:05:12 AM »
Quote
boobs are, avatars of it are not.
When it's your own head they are slapping against, yes, they are cool.
Hope this helps.
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whitewidow

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #10 on: April 14, 2007, 12:05:52 AM »
What's up lover.  Haven't heard from you in a while.  No more brilliant PM's?  Don't worry, I'll be back in NY soon enough.

 ;D ;)

Croatch

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #11 on: April 14, 2007, 12:06:55 AM »
Yes, Whitewidow.  Truly my biggest fan on getbig.  Good to have you aboard on this post. ;)
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Bluto

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #12 on: April 14, 2007, 12:08:05 AM »
When it's your own head they are slapping against, yes, they are cool.
Hope this helps.

so basically you a "grown man" wants to show other "grown men" that you got some tits? how old are you again?
Z

whitewidow

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #13 on: April 14, 2007, 12:14:11 AM »
I actually really like the 2nd part.The so, how is the working out going line is pretty good ;D

Debussey

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #14 on: April 14, 2007, 10:50:43 AM »
Debussey, you are the strongest man I've ever seen. How do you do it??? (A common question after a humanoid has observed Debussey's massive 45 pound bench press)

Support DEBUSSEYWORLD!

ThaRealist

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #15 on: April 14, 2007, 10:59:43 AM »
Boy, I have had alot of fun with snappy comebacks.

How much you bench?

"I dont bench"  This leaves alot of people speechless.

One time a black man in his 50s or so asked me, "What you drivin' (bench)?"  I told him a Mitsubishi, and pointed at my truck.

Do you lift weights?

"No, I do jumping jacks"

"No, I use the thighmaster"

"Im sweatin' to the oldies!"

Do you take steroids?

I like to answer this one with a question.

"Do you swallow?"

"Are your tits real?"
"Are you a homosexual?  'Cause you look like you suck dick"

"Do you eat porkchops?"

This is all I can come up with right now.  I know I have more, but its late.

I am using that one the next time I am in a club/bar and a chick asks me if I use LoL....
You Can't Do It!!!

SteelePegasus

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #16 on: April 14, 2007, 11:04:56 AM »
Q: How often do you work out?
A: Once a month or so

Q:What do you eat?
A:a handle full of raisins every 4 hours

Q:How much do you bench?
A: I don't, racket ball builds pecs faster
Here comes the money shot

Colossus_1986

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #17 on: April 14, 2007, 11:09:08 AM »
i was getting ready to lift the bar and do deadlifts at 405 to the floor.
guy asks "are you gonna lift all of that alone?
i was gonna die so hard i had to undo my straps, and walk for a few moments before i laughed during a set and got hurt.
i answered him "maybe" before i took the walk...

finurface

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #18 on: April 14, 2007, 11:36:30 AM »
"why do you bodybuild /lift weights?"


answer:

"that's not the good question, the real question is, why dont most people take care of themselves , look like shit, and are ashamed of their physique, which cause them to be extremely frustrated  when looking in the mirror every single evening ?" while looking at the person who asked you the dumb question from feet to haircut.


"do you lift weights?"


No, i'm born like this.







When there are some angry and jealous insecure guys and girls surrounding me, i use to tell the guys "i know you want to touch it, i'm no monster,i wont bite you, want to see how it feels?(flexing arm in front of their face) cmon, don't be so insecure, it doesnt mean you re gay or anything, you re just curious thats normal "  ;D

usually the girls stand still for a second, speechless , and immediately come close and start touching :D
And the guys are owned, whatever they say, they will sound insecure and jealous, scared the girls may compare their physique to yours, a thing they quickly do everytime :D

At this point, the only thing you have to do is act the way people are waiting for you to act. At the first sight, they think you re a moron anyways.So why not suprise em , and act like an heartless and pretentious guy instead of just being a moron , saying nothing?
Most people think muscle men = dumb; if you can make em speechless, they understand they were fooled, were wrong and that you owned em both physically, but mentally too.


People dont really want to know you, they want to know if they re "above" or "under" you. Make sure to make clear who 's the bitch in the place, with a big smile. After all, THEY asked for it.

In the end, they get owned, and even if they still think you re a moron , they know you re a moron who destroyed em without even using his muscles, just his BRAIN.

SteelePegasus

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #19 on: April 14, 2007, 11:40:38 AM »
"why do you bodybuild /lift weights?"


answer:

"that's not the good question, the real question is, why dont most people take care of themselves , look like shit, and are ashamed of their physique, which cause them to be extremely frustrated  when looking in the mirror every single evening ?" while looking at the person who asked you the dumb question from feet to haircut.


"do you lift weights?"


No, i'm born like this.

you first answer is too complicated and would cause them to use brain power...

a better answer would be "I have nothing better to do?"
Here comes the money shot

finurface

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #20 on: April 14, 2007, 11:47:14 AM »
you first answer is too complicated and would cause them to use brain power...

a better answer would be "I have nothing better to do?"

i promise its not too complicated... i mean i really use to say it everytime someone tries to sound like a smartass , and it always destroy the idiot, girl or guy.

You have to understand most of the time people are just trying to start shit cause they feel "hurt" looking like crap compared to you. there s nothing nice in this kind of discussion, they re here to annoy you, so i make sure to not disapoint em.
I just point at their insecurities, complexes and frustration without any remorse and with a big smile...In one sentence, you destroy em, and after a while, they come back to you, trying another aproach, more humble, and asking you how you did "this" to your body.
At this point, you re the one who decides how to treat em, they re basically just asking you to give em some attention and hope you will excuse em for their first aggressive and insecure reaction.
You decide to be cool, or to burry em a bit deeper.

Its always the same process.


Camel Jockey

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #21 on: April 14, 2007, 12:04:28 PM »
Man, what do you eat?

rice krispies treats and mountain dew

Do you work out?

Nah, I just have great genes.

How often do you workout?

After gorging on coronas and icecream.

finurface

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #22 on: April 14, 2007, 12:10:55 PM »


Do you work out?

Nah, I just have great genes.



haha good one.

what about : "i'm just genetically superior to most people"  hahahaha

ManBearPig...

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #23 on: April 14, 2007, 12:16:54 PM »
you first answer is too complicated and would cause them to use brain power...

a better answer would be "I have nothing better to do?"

ha ha, i say that to the gym rats assholes who try to be friends with everyone at the gym.

"swelling up again bro??"
"(roll eyes) Yeah, got nothing better to do."
Deep Tissue Massage

Croatch

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Re: Funny questions you get on lifting...
« Reply #24 on: April 14, 2007, 06:37:30 PM »
Quote
so basically you a "grown man" wants to show other "grown men" that you got some tits? how old are you again?
hahah, I love this guy Bluto.  The only "man" who gives me shit about smacking 2 oversized milkbags in my face.  Yeah, you got me Bluto, I'm boring and childish...haha
Yes, everyone I know has a big pair of DD's smacking themselves in the face in a gif format...ahahah  Fucking Bluto man, guy is a demented freak..a.ahaha
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