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Author Topic: Eliot & Silda Spitzer  (Read 22419 times)
BayGBM
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« on: March 11, 2008, 10:36:08 PM »

Would finding out that your husband of many years (not your boyfriend) had seen a hooker end your relationship?

http://www.nypost.com/seven/03112008/news/regionalnews/spitzer_has_used_hookers_for_6_years__so_101444.htm?page=0

Somehow, I doubt that this marriage is going to end over this.  Your thoughts?


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w8m8
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« Reply #1 on: March 12, 2008, 06:13:34 AM »

Would finding out that your husband of many years (not your boyfriend) had seen a hooker end your relationship?
Somehow, I doubt that this marriage is going to end over this.  Your thoughts?

Finding out something that affects so many people in so many ways

Hell Yes , he'd be in so much pain he'd never be right again  Angry
He humiliated her !!!! in front of the whole friggin' world !!

I'm really an odd person , here's my take on prostitution  > if he was able to afford me AND a few tricks a yr. , keep it wrapped up , make sure I don't get anything from it , and have yourself a blast .

You're as sick as your secrets
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« Reply #2 on: March 12, 2008, 06:44:17 AM »

Would finding out that your husband of many years (not your boyfriend) had seen a hooker end your relationship?

Yes



Somehow, I doubt that this marriage is going to end over this.  Your thoughts?
I think it will end.



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« Reply #3 on: March 12, 2008, 07:17:11 AM »

Yes

Are you married?  Have you been married for years with children?  Or are you just answering theoretically?  Women who stay with a man who cheated are often criticized, but I think it's a lot harder to give up on a marriage after you've invested so many years together and children are involved.  Especially if you love the guy and he is otherwise (aside from cheating with a hooker Undecided ) a good spouse.


I think it will end.

The fact that Silda stood there next to him during his little news conference suggests to me that she may not leave him.  He'd be in the doghouse for a good long while and she could milk that for a while...  Wink   Seriously, with a lot of marriage counseling they could work things out and still make a go of it, don't you think?

Here's another thought.  Assuming she leaves him what are his prospects?  Would you date someone who had this very public episode in his past even if he had $$?  If not you, what kind of woman would date or marry a man like this?  It's not as if he is 80; his romantic life is far from over.  If he ends up single when this is all over, what sort of woman does he go for?  A young bimbo with no standards?  A submissive foreign woman who is not clued into American scandals?


The unspoken element in all the press coverage of this story is what I call the "cockroach effect."  For every one you see, there are literally dozens you don't see.  Hillary Clinton, Jim McGreevy, Terry McMillan, Mrs. Larry Craig, Mrs. Ted Haggard--all had cheating spouses but the incidence of infidelity is far more common than all these judgmental talking heads on TV seem prepared to acknowledge.

No one--especially no woman--should be quick to judge Silda Spitzer.  Remember the wife of Senator David Vitter (R-La)?  Years ago in an interview she mocked Hillary Clinton and indicated she had better control of her man and that she would not tolerate him cheating on her.  Fast forward a few years and her words came back to haunt her when her husband's name and number showed up on the DC Madam's phone records.  http://www.thekansan.com/stories/071007/topstories_071007006.shtml


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« Reply #4 on: March 12, 2008, 07:26:45 AM »

If his wife swallowed............... ........he wouldn't have "spit"

get it??

swallowed
spit

spitzer

hahha?
no?


never  mind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   Angry
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Laura Lee
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« Reply #5 on: March 12, 2008, 08:39:57 AM »

I have absolutely no tolerance for anyone who cheats.  They wouldn't even have the opportunity to remove my shoe from their ass before they were out the door.  Wink
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« Reply #6 on: March 12, 2008, 08:59:32 AM »

I have absolutely no tolerance for anyone who cheats.  They wouldn't even have the opportunity to remove my shoe from their ass before they were out the door.  Wink

Would you consider "Machine Porn" (Sybian) cheating?HuhHuh................
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« Reply #7 on: March 12, 2008, 09:08:50 AM »

Would you consider "Machine Porn" (Sybian) cheating?HuhHuh................
I'd consider it having a problem in your relationship that you have the need to use one.  Grin
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Cheesy Weee
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« Reply #8 on: March 12, 2008, 10:20:59 AM »

Are you married?  Have you been married for years with children?  Or are you just answering theoretically?  Women who stay with a man who cheated are often criticized, but I think it's a lot harder to give up on a marriage after you've invested so many years together and children are involved.  Especially if you love the guy and he is otherwise (aside from cheating with a hooker Undecided ) a good spouse.

Yes, I've been married almost 14 years.  No children.

I'm not criticizing anyone who stays w/a cheater...that is their decision. 

Your question was if he cheated w/a hooker....that indicates to me a planned, intentionally devious escapade.  It's not like it was a "mistake."  If he sought out and paid for a  hooker, he is not who I thought he was. 



Here's another thought.  Assuming she leaves him what are his prospects?  Would you date someone who had this very public episode in his past even if he had $$?  If not you, what kind of woman would date or marry a man like this? 

No, I wouldn't date him.  I don't know who would date him; I'm sure there are plenty of women that wouldn't have a problem w/it and that's fine for them.

  If he ends up single when this is all over, what sort of woman does he go for? 

probably hookers





The unspoken element in all the press coverage of this story is what I call the "cockroach effect."  For every one you see, there are literally dozens you don't see.  Hillary Clinton, Jim McGreevy, Terry McMillan, Mrs. Larry Craig, Mrs. Ted Haggard--all had cheating spouses but the incidence of infidelity is far more common than all these judgmental talking heads on TV seem prepared to acknowledge.

No one--especially no woman--should be quick to judge Silda Spitzer.  Remember the wife of Senator David Vitter (R-La)?  Years ago in an interview she mocked Hillary Clinton and indicated she had better control of her man and that she would not tolerate him cheating on her.  Fast forward a few years and her words came back to haunt her when her husband's name and number showed up on the DC Madam's phone records.  http://www.thekansan.com/stories/071007/topstories_071007006.shtml

Are people judging Silda?  I haven't seen that.





The fact that Silda stood there next to him during his little news conference suggests to me that she may not leave him.  He'd be in the doghouse for a good long while and she could milk that for a while...  Wink   Seriously, with a lot of marriage counseling they could work things out and still make a go of it, don't you think?



Why stand by these men?
A disgraced politician apologizes to the public, wife by his side. He has to be there. What's her reason?
By Nara Schoenberg
March 12, 2008

The sight of a political wife standing at her husband's side as he issues an awkward apology in connection with an alleged sexual indiscretion is at once heart-wrenchingly particular and oddly familiar.

Haven't we seen it all before?

Indeed, Silda Wall Spitzer's appearance in support of her husband, Eliot, the New York governor who allegedly met with a prostitute, echoed that of Dina McGreevey, the former New Jersey first lady whose husband in 2004 admitted to an affair with a man, right down to the wife's choice of attire (pastel blue jacket) and accessories (demure pearls).
 
In what is developing into a set piece of American political scandal, Silda Spitzer chose to deploy the silence of Suzanne Craig, wife of Idaho Sen. Larry Craig, and the G-rated physical contact (hand-holding) of Carlita Kilpatrick, wife of Kwame Kilpatrick, mayor of Detroit.

"That's always" the case, that the wife makes an official appearance in the face of sexual scandal, says Kathleen Gilbert, an associate professor of family studies at Indiana University. "Even if they want to kill him, they're there."

What these women are going through is probably "pretty horrifying," says Gilbert, but their options are few: "Just try to put yourself in their shoes and think of all these years you have portrayed a public role. In some ways, it becomes automatic. This is what you do. You're a good soldier and you go in and you play the role."

Many political spouses are impressive figures in their own right, including Silda Spitzer, a Harvard-trained lawyer.

Experts offered a wide range of reasons why a political spouse might choose to undergo the humiliation of a public appearance in behalf of her husband: the alleged indiscretion might be a first stumble, the wife might be planning divorce but want the best possible settlement, or she might be deeply invested in her husband's political agenda.

Dina McGreevey said in an " Oprah Winfrey" interview that it was difficult to appear at her husband's side, but she did so for the sake of their then 2-year-old daughter.

"I thought about it, and I thought, well, I've stood by his side all these years. We have a daughter together, and one day she's going to hear about this or read about it, and she's going to ask me, 'Mommy, why weren't you at Daddy's side?'" she says.

The appearance by the wife accomplishes at least one thing, according to Northwestern University political science professor Kenneth Janda: "It tends to make the offense seem somewhat less serious. If the wife were not there, it would appear the family had fallen apart."

Interestingly, though, the trot-out-the-wife technique may be no more beneficial to politicians than it is pleasant for their spouses.

"It rarely works," says Brian Gaines, an assistant professor at the Institute of Government and Public Affairs at the University of Illinois.

"McGreevey was basically throwing in the towel anyway. He was stepping down. Craig I think is making it interesting and stretching it out, but I think his political career is over as well" as a result of allegations he tried to solicit sex in an airport restroom.

In political science, researchers have found that likability is not nearly as important in weathering a scandal as competence, Gaines says.

"People will forgive a scandal if they think a politician or candidate is particularly competent. And in [Bill] Clinton's case I think it was competence that saved him. People thought: Well, I wouldn't want him alone in an elevator with my daughter, but he seems pretty good at running the economy."

And what of the women who are called upon to perform the painful -- and maybe ineffective -- role of supportive spouse in a sex scandal?

Some, most notably Hillary Clinton, emerge largely unscathed, although it is worth noting that she did not appear at her husband's side during the live televised address in which he confessed to an inappropriate relationship with Monica Lewinsky.

Suzanne Craig is still soldiering on, according to news reports.

Silda Spitzer, 50, who is raising three teenage daughters, has not yet deviated from the standard script.

But McGreevey not only appeared on "Oprah" but wrote a book, "Silent Partner: A Memoir of My Marriage."

McGreevey, who listened with an incongruous smile on her face as her husband announced that he was gay, later told Winfrey, "I smiled because I didn't want to break down. But, as his world was falling apart, he was still choreographing the entire day and how everything would play out. [He] told me when to smile, what to say if I was asked a question by reporters.

"He was telling me what to do, and he said, 'You have to be Jackie Kennedy today.' And I'm thinking, 'Jackie Kennedy -- her husband was murdered. You lied and cheated on me, and I have to be Jackie Kennedy?'"


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« Reply #9 on: March 12, 2008, 10:26:45 AM »

Yes, I've been married almost 14 years.  No children.

I'm not criticizing anyone who stays w/a cheater...that is their decision. 

Your question was if he cheated w/a hooker....that indicates to me a planned, intentionally devious escapade.  It's not like it was a "mistake."  If he sought out and paid for a  hooker, he is not who I thought he was. 

No, I wouldn't date him.  I don't know who would date him; I'm sure there are plenty of women that wouldn't have a problem w/it and that's fine for them.
probably hookers

Are people judging Silda?  I haven't seen that.



Why stand by these men?
A disgraced politician apologizes to the public, wife by his side. He has to be there. What's her reason?
By Nara Schoenberg
March 12, 2008

The sight of a political wife standing at her husband's side as he issues an awkward apology in connection with an alleged sexual indiscretion is at once heart-wrenchingly particular and oddly familiar.

Haven't we seen it all before?

Indeed, Silda Wall Spitzer's appearance in support of her husband, Eliot, the New York governor who allegedly met with a prostitute, echoed that of Dina McGreevey, the former New Jersey first lady whose husband in 2004 admitted to an affair with a man, right down to the wife's choice of attire (pastel blue jacket) and accessories (demure pearls).
 
In what is developing into a set piece of American political scandal, Silda Spitzer chose to deploy the silence of Suzanne Craig, wife of Idaho Sen. Larry Craig, and the G-rated physical contact (hand-holding) of Carlita Kilpatrick, wife of Kwame Kilpatrick, mayor of Detroit.

"That's always" the case, that the wife makes an official appearance in the face of sexual scandal, says Kathleen Gilbert, an associate professor of family studies at Indiana University. "Even if they want to kill him, they're there."

What these women are going through is probably "pretty horrifying," says Gilbert, but their options are few: "Just try to put yourself in their shoes and think of all these years you have portrayed a public role. In some ways, it becomes automatic. This is what you do. You're a good soldier and you go in and you play the role."

Many political spouses are impressive figures in their own right, including Silda Spitzer, a Harvard-trained lawyer.

Experts offered a wide range of reasons why a political spouse might choose to undergo the humiliation of a public appearance in behalf of her husband: the alleged indiscretion might be a first stumble, the wife might be planning divorce but want the best possible settlement, or she might be deeply invested in her husband's political agenda.

Dina McGreevey said in an " Oprah Winfrey" interview that it was difficult to appear at her husband's side, but she did so for the sake of their then 2-year-old daughter.

"I thought about it, and I thought, well, I've stood by his side all these years. We have a daughter together, and one day she's going to hear about this or read about it, and she's going to ask me, 'Mommy, why weren't you at Daddy's side?'" she says.

The appearance by the wife accomplishes at least one thing, according to Northwestern University political science professor Kenneth Janda: "It tends to make the offense seem somewhat less serious. If the wife were not there, it would appear the family had fallen apart."

Interestingly, though, the trot-out-the-wife technique may be no more beneficial to politicians than it is pleasant for their spouses.

"It rarely works," says Brian Gaines, an assistant professor at the Institute of Government and Public Affairs at the University of Illinois.

"McGreevey was basically throwing in the towel anyway. He was stepping down. Craig I think is making it interesting and stretching it out, but I think his political career is over as well" as a result of allegations he tried to solicit sex in an airport restroom.

In political science, researchers have found that likability is not nearly as important in weathering a scandal as competence, Gaines says.

"People will forgive a scandal if they think a politician or candidate is particularly competent. And in [Bill] Clinton's case I think it was competence that saved him. People thought: Well, I wouldn't want him alone in an elevator with my daughter, but he seems pretty good at running the economy."

And what of the women who are called upon to perform the painful -- and maybe ineffective -- role of supportive spouse in a sex scandal?

Some, most notably Hillary Clinton, emerge largely unscathed, although it is worth noting that she did not appear at her husband's side during the live televised address in which he confessed to an inappropriate relationship with Monica Lewinsky.

Suzanne Craig is still soldiering on, according to news reports.

Silda Spitzer, 50, who is raising three teenage daughters, has not yet deviated from the standard script.

But McGreevey not only appeared on "Oprah" but wrote a book, "Silent Partner: A Memoir of My Marriage."

McGreevey, who listened with an incongruous smile on her face as her husband announced that he was gay, later told Winfrey, "I smiled because I didn't want to break down. But, as his world was falling apart, he was still choreographing the entire day and how everything would play out. [He] told me when to smile, what to say if I was asked a question by reporters.

"He was telling me what to do, and he said, 'You have to be Jackie Kennedy today.' And I'm thinking, 'Jackie Kennedy -- her husband was murdered. You lied and cheated on me, and I have to be Jackie Kennedy?'"




Jess!................please keep your posts down to a Short Story (not a Novel!)

TY!.........(the management)
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Butterbean
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« Reply #10 on: March 12, 2008, 10:30:55 AM »

Jess!................please keep your posts down to a Short Story (not a Novel!)

TY!.........(the management)
Just don't read the article guy!  I mean Goober!
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« Reply #11 on: March 12, 2008, 10:57:30 AM »

yes, he has a problem, and total disregard for the health of his wife.


 
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« Reply #12 on: March 12, 2008, 10:59:40 AM »

Stella:

For the most part, I like your answers.  You go girl!

>Q. If he ends up single when this is all over, what sort of woman does he go for?

>A. probably hookers

I donítí think he would go for a hooker type.  At least not for a relationship.  Remember, his wife was also a Harvard law school grad.  I think guys like this want what they consider a peer in a relationship.  Someone respectable they can introduce to family and friends, & whom they can enjoy talking to day to day... but they want a whore in the sac.  Someone who will do whatever they want with no questions ask. 

Hmm, I think I just described myself!   Embarrassed Grin

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w8m8
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« Reply #13 on: March 12, 2008, 11:02:10 AM »

Just don't read the article guy!  I mean Goober!

 Grin






ps : Spitzer is one goofy looking dude , his choices would be limited  Roll Eyes unless he's still loaded with cash
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« Reply #14 on: March 12, 2008, 11:04:43 AM »



 Roll Eyes at Bay comparing himself to Spitzer.

Spitzer's dad is worth close to a billion dollars.

And Spitzer can be quite personable.
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w8m8
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« Reply #15 on: March 12, 2008, 11:23:13 AM »


 Roll Eyes at Bay comparing himself to Spitzer.

Spitzer's dad is worth close to a billion dollars.

And Spitzer can be quite personable.

I'm sure there will always be someone willing to hook up with him

I just know they won't be there for his "charm"

he's a putz with big ears and a idiot look about him


his name should be Goober
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calmus
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« Reply #16 on: March 12, 2008, 11:30:11 AM »

I'm sure there will always be someone willing to hook up with him

I just know they won't be there for his "charm"

he's a putz with big ears and a idiot look about him


his name should be Goober

LOL.  He's an extremely wealthy, intelligent, and ambitious man.  I doubt there's five women in a hundred who wouldn't jump in the sack with him. 

The interesting thing is he opted for a hooker.... 


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« Reply #17 on: March 12, 2008, 12:16:25 PM »


Here's another thought.  Assuming she leaves him what are his prospects?  Would you date someone who had this very public episode in his past even if he had $$?  If not you, what kind of woman would date or marry a man like this? 

Apparently, you're not familiar with the upper-eastside of Manhattan. He'll get another woman in 2 seconds flat.
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« Reply #18 on: March 12, 2008, 02:03:29 PM »

LOL.  He's an extremely wealthy, intelligent, and ambitious man.  I doubt there's five women in a hundred who wouldn't jump in the sack with him. 

The interesting thing is he opted for a hooker.... 




Maybe hookers are easier to get rid of.
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BayGBM
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« Reply #19 on: March 12, 2008, 03:10:23 PM »

Maybe hookers are easier to get rid of.

"You don't pay a hooker for sex... you pay her to leave."
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« Reply #20 on: March 12, 2008, 06:17:05 PM »

He's worth $400 million?

he'll do okay if he ends up single.  Woman always seem to find the inner beauty of very rich men.
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« Reply #21 on: March 13, 2008, 02:29:01 AM »

What I find really fascinating is that the population is so quick to want to impeach a man from public service for private indiscretions, ...but will readily accept men whose public lying, cheating, stealing, and reckless profiteering from his public office leads to so many dead people both at home & abroad.  Undecided  Boggles my mind.
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« Reply #22 on: March 13, 2008, 05:51:43 AM »

Stella:

For the most part, I like your answers.  You go girl!

>Q. If he ends up single when this is all over, what sort of woman does he go for?

>A. probably hookers

I donítí think he would go for a hooker type.  At least not for a relationship.  Remember, his wife was also a Harvard law school grad.  I think guys like this want what they consider a peer in a relationship.  Someone respectable they can introduce to family and friends, & whom they can enjoy talking to day to day... but they want a whore in the sac.  Someone who will do whatever they want with no questions ask. 

Hmm, I think I just described myself!   Embarrassed Grin


Do you think he'll keep seeing hookers on the side?
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« Reply #23 on: March 13, 2008, 05:54:25 AM »

Do you think he'll keep seeing hookers on the side?

That's what I've been wondering too STella  Undecided
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« Reply #24 on: March 13, 2008, 05:56:45 AM »

That's what I've been wondering too STella  Undecided
Yeah, seems like whomever dates him if he becomes single should take it into consideration
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