Cool.....I'll get on that prayer right away.....
JEEZUS....sweet JEEZUS! I come to you today, in hopes that you'll cure the sick, the drug addicted, vain, self loathing, gay-4-paying, pro bber who shall remain anonymous. Please, ignore all other callings for help. Ignore the widows, the starving children, the terminally ill, thru no will of their own. Ignore the homeless......just help this scumbag pro bber who needs you, JEEZUS! SHAMALA, SHABALA, SHANGRA LA, M Night Shyamalan! JEEXZUS oh JEEZUS....I feel your presence!
While I got your attention JEEZUS, I have to ask you something: must you watch me masturbate? Never mind. Just heal the sick pro bber, who's bad shape right now. Help him get another sponsor, JEESZUS. One who'll pay for medical care, in exchange for sex, JEEZUS!
In your name I pray, JEEZUS.....amen!