Author Topic: Trouble with the wife (Read 13566 times)

shiftedShapes · « **Reply #75 on:** April 30, 2010, 12:13:41 PM »

Quote from: The True Adonis on April 29, 2010, 04:22:42 PM

Just err on the side of Fact, Evidence, Science and Logic.

Shifted, can you detail the argument so that we can assess who was correct and who was not.

This should be easy.

The substance of the confrontation would bore you all to tears.

The good news is though I waited for her to come around and approach me looking to reconcile. At that point we did and had a very constructive conversation. Hopefully fights will be less frequent and less intense going forward.

I'm happy that I don't have to deal with this shit anymore it is a real weight off my chest. Also glad I waited it out and didn't cave, that would definitely send the wrong message.

shiftedShapes · « **Reply #76 on:** April 30, 2010, 12:19:02 PM »

Quote from: The Showstoppa on April 29, 2010, 04:48:22 PM

My guess is that she won't let go of a past relationship you had, right?

nah way past that, we've been living together over 10 years and married for almost 5!

K-1 · « **Reply #77 on:** April 30, 2010, 12:19:59 PM »

Quote from: shiftedShapes on April 30, 2010, 12:13:41 PM

The substance of the confrontation would bore you all to tears.

The good news is though I waited for her to come around and approach me looking to reconcile. At that point we did and had a very constructive conversation. Hopefully fights will be less frequent and less intense going forward.

I'm happy that I don't have to deal with this shit anymore it is a real weight off my chest. Also glad I waited it out and didn't cave, that would definitely send the wrong message.

congrats...I hate drama in house. There is enough drama and stuff you can't control that goes on in the world...the last thing I need is to come home to it.

You guys should plan an evening alone and have a few drinks or something together. Do a date or something different this weekend.

jaejonna · « **Reply #78 on:** April 30, 2010, 12:21:38 PM »

If you don't please your wife, she will find someone who will ..

shiftedShapes · « **Reply #79 on:** April 30, 2010, 01:16:21 PM »

Quote from: K-1 on April 30, 2010, 12:19:59 PM

congrats...I hate drama in house. There is enough drama and stuff you can't control that goes on in the world...the last thing I need is to come home to it.

You guys should plan an evening alone and have a few drinks or something together. Do a date or something different this weekend.

yeah you read my mind.

Actually having a few days apart and not getting along really does make it that much sweeter to reconcile, especially because we work together as well so we are accustomed to 24/7 togetherness.

shiftedShapes · « **Reply #80 on:** April 30, 2010, 01:20:37 PM »

Quote from: jaejonna on April 30, 2010, 12:21:38 PM

If you don't please your wife, she will find someone who will ..

I don't worry about that shit. I think actually that worrying about it makes you more vulnerable, if your woman can tell that you are not worried she will assume that you are deserving.

Cardfan · « **Reply #81 on:** April 30, 2010, 02:14:55 PM »

poison

shiftedShapes · « **Reply #82 on:** April 30, 2010, 02:27:42 PM »

Quote from: Cardfan on April 30, 2010, 02:14:55 PM

poison

maybe next time

heathen · « **Reply #83 on:** April 30, 2010, 02:34:28 PM »

beat her with a phonebook

benchmstr · « **Reply #84 on:** April 30, 2010, 02:37:14 PM »

Quote from: heathen on April 30, 2010, 02:34:28 PM

beat her with a phonebook

i dont care what anybody says that shit makes a mess......

bench

Wiggs · « **Reply #85 on:** April 30, 2010, 02:45:07 PM »

Quote from: chaos on April 29, 2010, 11:15:01 PM

If you're looking for advice on how to beat women, who better to look to then a black man?

If I want any lip out of you I'll dangle my zipper.

chaos · « **Reply #86 on:** April 30, 2010, 03:56:35 PM »

Quote from: Wiggs on April 30, 2010, 02:45:07 PM

If I want any lip out of you I'll dangle my zipper.

Speaking of lips..........

drkaje · « **Reply #87 on:** April 30, 2010, 04:14:25 PM »

Quote from: shiftedShapes on April 30, 2010, 12:13:41 PM

The substance of the confrontation would bore you all to tears.

The good news is though I waited for her to come around and approach me looking to reconcile. At that point we did and had a very constructive conversation. Hopefully fights will be less frequent and less intense going forward.

I'm happy that I don't have to deal with this shit anymore it is a real weight off my chest. Also glad I waited it out and didn't cave, that would definitely send the wrong message.

Most of the stuff they go on about is boring, LOL!

Tapeworm · « **Reply #88 on:** April 30, 2010, 05:38:36 PM »

Quote from: jaejonna on April 30, 2010, 12:21:38 PM

If you don't please your wife, she will find someone who will ..

Are you suggesting there's been some sort of vagina crisis?

newmom · « **Reply #89 on:** April 30, 2010, 05:40:38 PM »

Quote from: K-1 on April 30, 2010, 12:19:59 PM

You guys should plan an evening alone and have a few drinks or something together. Do a date or something different this weekend.

See that is a great idea..spot on K1

drkaje · « **Reply #90 on:** April 30, 2010, 05:53:43 PM »

Quote from: newmom on April 30, 2010, 05:40:38 PM

See that is a great idea..spot on K1

Serious question: Why reward bad behavior?

This is the main reason relationships are so messed up. If someone's nice, treat them nice. A nice night out, dinner, dancing and a movie will only teach her that being a pain in the ass gets rewarded.

newmom · « **Reply #91 on:** April 30, 2010, 06:00:20 PM »

I dont see it as rewarding for bad behavior..but come on making up is the best part IMO

drkaje · « **Reply #92 on:** April 30, 2010, 06:04:32 PM »

Quote from: newmom on April 30, 2010, 06:00:20 PM

I dont see it as rewarding for bad behavior..but come on making up is the best part IMO

Newmom,

Not being a dick but that's foolish.

Most people, like puppies, can't tell the difference between positive and negative attention. At some point his wife could just as easily begin starting big fights just to make up.

newmom · « **Reply #93 on:** April 30, 2010, 06:09:02 PM »

well its just my opinion. I don't like fighting, so I either just cool off..give me 5 minutes alone and I'm usually fine. Life is to short to argue

Tapeworm · « **Reply #94 on:** April 30, 2010, 06:13:41 PM »

Quote from: drkaje on April 30, 2010, 05:53:43 PM

Serious question: Why reward bad behavior?

This is the main reason relationships are so messed up. If someone's nice, treat them nice. A nice night out, dinner, dancing and a movie will only teach her that being a pain in the ass gets rewarded.

I'd like to find someone that I enjoy making happy without ulterior motivation or scorekeeping and who feels the same about me. Who wants to marry a lab rat?

Admit I am very possibly living in la la land.

benchmstr · « **Reply #95 on:** April 30, 2010, 06:15:57 PM »

Quote from: newmom on April 30, 2010, 06:09:02 PM

well its just my opinion. I don't like fighting, so I either just cool off..give me 5 minutes alone and I'm usually fine. Life is to short to argue

you masturbate?

bench

newmom · « **Reply #96 on:** April 30, 2010, 06:16:23 PM »

Quote from: Tapeworm on April 30, 2010, 06:13:41 PM

I'd like to find someone that I enjoy making happy without ulterior motivation or scorekeeping and who feels the same about me. Who wants to marry a lab rat?

Admit I am very possibly living in la la land.

No I dont think you are tapeworm. It's actually refreshing there are men out there that think the way you do, unless your being sarcastic

drkaje · « **Reply #97 on:** April 30, 2010, 06:30:04 PM »

Quote from: Tapeworm on April 30, 2010, 06:13:41 PM

I'd like to find someone that I enjoy making happy without ulterior motivation or scorekeeping and who feels the same about me. Who wants to marry a lab rat?

Admit I am very possibly living in la la land.

Good relationships take a lot of work. You have to say no to stuff that doesn't work or isn't good for both parties.

Parker · « **Reply #98 on:** April 30, 2010, 06:37:31 PM »

Quote from: drkaje on April 30, 2010, 06:04:32 PM

Newmom,

Not being a dick but that's foolish.

Most people, like puppies, can't tell the difference between positive and negative attention. At some point his wife could just as easily begin starting big fights just to make up.

"Make up, to Break Up"
by The Stylistics

Tapeworm · « **Reply #99 on:** April 30, 2010, 06:43:38 PM »

Quote from: newmom on April 30, 2010, 06:16:23 PM

No I dont think you are tapeworm. It's actually refreshing there are men out there that think the way you do, unless your being sarcastic

No, being serious. Trouble is I'm not sure there are any women out there who think the way I do! My main gripe is that women who are single in their 30s are basically pissed off because some guy(s) fucked them around/over. And now they have this list of demands and operation protocols which you'd think came down in stone from Mt Sinai. Love is pretty much an afterthought, after the accounting is taken care of. Strikes me as ice cold and it really puts me off. Imo all the accounting in the world won't make a happy marriage. All you get is two people arguing about the score, and even if they both agree it's a tie, that's a far cry from my idea of marital harmony.