I need help with a problem regarding 'Sea Monkeys'

[gym**rat]

Forget this bitch. Utilise your strengths.

Advertise on Craigslist for a woman who's into this sort of thing.

Great idea! Thank you!

[gym**rat]

You are obese.  Lose some fat and your problem will disappear.

Sorry to disapoint your steller owning of me but I am absolutely not obese, just having this particular issue. But thank you because your post really helped give me a whole new way of thinking. You have such great insight. Maybe someday I can be a True Adonis..   

[The True Adonis]

Sorry to disapoint your steller owning of me but I am absolutely not obese, just having this particular issue. But thank you because your post really helped give me a whole new way of thinking. You have such great insight. Maybe someday I can be a True Adonis..   

Don`t count on it anytime soon at least.

[gym**rat]

Bump for the S.M.U.  (Sea Monkey Update)

BBm thank you for your concern. I just sat down for this meeting 3 minutes ago and so far all is good. There was one cloth seat at this round table and some 500 lb fat skank waddled over and took it, probably because she has the same problem as me. The first meeting break is in an hour so I will see what grows. If I can discretely snap a pic of the little sea monkey I will.

[gym**rat]

Don`t count on it anytime soon at least.

Would you be my mentor and guru so that I can reach my goal at an optimal time? Come on, be a bud.

[supernick]

i have the same prob man. I think i have it worse, i sweat right through shorts and leave an ass print on any chair.  One thing i do now is put pressure on one ass cheek for like 10 min and then switch while the other cheek cools. give it a try.

[gym**rat]

i have the same prob man. I think i have it worse, i sweat right through shorts and leave an ass print on any chair.  One thing i do now is put pressure on one ass cheek for like 10 min and then switch while the other cheek cools. give it a try.

Wow a whole ass print! I am fully impressed! I cannot sit cheek to cheek because my bottom 2 back segments are fused and that would cause some major discomfort. My little sea monkeys would feel quite inferior next to your full cheek print.

[Butterbean]

.  One thing i do now is put pressure on one ass cheek for like 10 min and then switch while the other cheek cools. give it a try.

hahaha!

[gym**rat]

UPDATE: Got up for the first break but did the slide out of the chair to wipe it off. I could barely make out the steam print. Just remembering to do that everytime is my problem. I looked around at the other seats to see if they had goo ass as well but I guess I am the only freak in the room.

[Tapeworm]

ORLY?

http://www.flamewarriors.com/warriorshtm/archivist.htm

[Rambone]

UPDATE: Got up for the first break but did the slide out of the chair to wipe it off. I could barely make out the steam print. Just remembering to do that everytime is my problem. I looked around at the other seats to see if they had goo ass as well but I guess I am the only freak in the room.

How much you weigh brah? Sound like a mass monster freak

[gym**rat]

How much you weigh brah? Sound like a mass monster freak

215, 5' 10" pretty thick.  Def off season right now. I was born with great genetics, well except for the goo ass gene. But always big upper body and quads way before I started lifting. Small calves though, same as my dad. My dad was a big strong MF'r.

[El Diablo Blanco]

You need to get yourself a brazillian wax.  Get that hair clean away.  When you wipe your ass you'll use less toilet paper and your ass will feel cool.

I always end up getting sweaty in the hammy area.  Always worried about wearing khakis on a hot day when I have to sit down for a while.  Get rid of the hair!

[Rambone]

215, 5' 10" pretty thick.  Def off season right now. I was born with great genetics, well except for the goo ass gene. But always big upper body and quads way before I started lifting. Small calves though, same as my dad. My dad was a big strong MF'r.

Solid. I sweat a shitload myself, and I wear those UA boxer briefs that I think you or someone else said they used to wear. I think it's making it worse. Ill throw them on after a shower and in an hour they smell like ballsack sweat.

[TrapsMcLats]

You haven't said if you're carrying any extra lbs.

If so, dropping a few usually helps in the sweat department.

If you're a "sweater" weight makes no difference.  At my heaviest, I sweat like a pig.  At my lightest (difference between 270 and 200), I still sweat like a fucking pig.  I never get sick, though, and I don't have any wrinkles (ok, im not even 30), but I look much better than mots of my similarly aged friends.

[chunkramwell]

I buy a crapload of these things from Napa to clean up oil spills in our garage.  Maybe cut to fit your drawers?

[makaveli25]

Who cares anyways. Just push the chair under the desk real quick. So you have a sweaty ass there's worse things in life. What if you had a huge tumor on your face.

[gym**rat]

Solid. I sweat a shitload myself, and I wear those UA boxer briefs that I think you or someone else said they used to wear. I think it's making it worse. Ill throw them on after a shower and in an hour they smell like ballsack sweat.

The UA definitely made it worse. Those are not cheap either.

[gym**rat]

Who cares anyways. Just push the chair under the desk real quick. So you have a sweaty ass there's worse things in life. What if you had a huge tumor on your face.

I am kinda hurt, I thought you did care.   

[El Diablo Blanco]

The UA definitely made it worse. Those are not cheap either.

Stay away from any "sport performance" underwear.  That material is made to allow sweat to breath through keeping your ass dry but pushes the sweat out to your pants causing an even bitter sweat monkey.  You need 100% cotton briefs.  Stay away from the calvin bullshit with spandex and such.  Like a poster said earlier.  I can shower be fresh and wear UA, calvin etc... and then start smelling sweaty balls right away.  I bought some normal cotton underwear and never had that smell or sweat issue.  Those breathable materials are shit.  Makes you hot and sweaty.  Use to wear Addidas. Nike, UA shit to workout.  The sweat just makes the shirts feel heavy and uncomfortable.  I wear a normal tank top or t shirt and I feel lighter and better.

[loco]

I tried Bodyglide, that made it worse. I researched and found a link that suggested Corn Starch. That shit ended up like I rammed a whole tube of raw biscuits in my ass crack. Not pretty.

ROFLFAO !!!! I nominate this " Funniest Post Of The Year " !!!!

LOL...I second that.

[Hulkotron]

Up the dosage + upright rows.

[K-1]

I have to wear dress pants for work. I either conduct or attend meetings all week long. When I sit on a vinyl or leather covered chair for over a 1/2 an hour, when I get up I leave what I like to call a "Sea Monkey". A small line of ass and/or ballsack sweat on the seat of the chair. Yesterday I was sitting next to a pretty good looking woman and was working her a little but when we got up for a break she looked down and seen my sea monkey. That pretty much ruined any chance I had if any. I bath everyday and have even tried baby powder in the morning. The baby powder just turns into cake batter.
Anyone else have this problem and has a solution? I thought of stuffing a slice of Wonder Bread in my shorts to soak it up but that could get messy as well. Pic available on request. Thank you in advance.

I love the honesty and realness of this. LMAO. I sweat like running water and go through baby powder like it's deodorant myself. It won't work for ass crack sweat though. Try this lol

[makaveli25]

Up the dosage + upright rows.

He needs a dry ass not win Mr. Olympia 

[Rambone]

Is anybody else's balls sweating while reading this thread? Wearing a pair of UAs boxer briefs as we speak.