galain
Getbig III
Posts: 536
Getbig!
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« Reply #50 on: September 27, 2012, 11:27:36 PM » |
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Women don't care about money, they will always love you for being the scruffily yet charming, secretly damaged but smiling on the outside handyman they saw when they first laid eyes on you.
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sync pulse
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« Reply #51 on: September 27, 2012, 11:31:51 PM » |
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uhhhh is that the same shit I use to put on my face? lol
yes... |
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BIG ACH
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« Reply #52 on: September 27, 2012, 11:48:41 PM » |
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If you run a car on a ramp that flings your car over a body of water, you will ALWAYS make it to the other side, there is no way in hell that you will end up in the water.... and when you do make it to the other side, the car will definitely still be drivable!
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booty
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« Reply #53 on: September 27, 2012, 11:53:32 PM » |
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You can be 5 feet away from a massive explosion and feel nothing, especially true when casually walking away from the blast.
Yes I've always wondered about this also. |
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booty
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« Reply #54 on: September 27, 2012, 11:56:47 PM » |
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Female actresses always wake up with perfectly brushed hair, makeup and clean teeth. Males wake up with the perfect amount of stubble and are able to quickly get dressed and be out the door packing a gun if a bad guy is beating down the door.
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BigCyp
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« Reply #55 on: September 28, 2012, 06:06:33 AM » |
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Stalking a woman is the way to her heart
Taxi Driver |
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BigCyp
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« Reply #56 on: September 28, 2012, 06:16:17 AM » |
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If you kill every single bad guy in the remote warehouse, you won't have anybody coming after you in revenge for killing half of the local mob.
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cart@@n
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« Reply #57 on: September 28, 2012, 06:26:14 AM » |
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If you are taking a brutal beating in a fight, you need to relax and remember the teachings of your martial arts master.
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JasonH
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« Reply #58 on: September 28, 2012, 06:27:04 AM » |
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John Travolta and Tom Cruise All A-List Stars are Heterosexual
Fixed. |
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Papyrus
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« Reply #59 on: September 28, 2012, 01:03:59 PM » |
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The detectives ALWAYS, ALWAYS have to go interrogate the guy moving crates from one pile to another pile 10 feet away, in order to solve the crime.
Lol i love this thread  |
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ukjeff
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« Reply #60 on: September 28, 2012, 01:48:57 PM » |
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Top tip
If you catch James bond, shoot him in the head instantly, do not, I repeat do not give him a guided tour of your underground base and explain your plans of world domination.
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snx
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« Reply #61 on: September 28, 2012, 02:01:50 PM » |
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I learned that if I run my car at full speed into the back of a parked car, I won't simply crumple into a twisted heap of metal and crush both cars. Instead, I'll ramp over the car in a sideways fashion, and twist the car over itself in mid-air, landing on my wheels at some point down the road. There will likely also be minimal damage to the front fenders, which is nice.
I learned that it's relatively ok to spy on sorority houses and the girls showering inside. At worst, I'll probably fall off my ladder into a bush and smile, or have a finger wagged at me sternly by the house mother. No charges will be laid by police, who will simply play it off as boys being boys.
I learned that you can't ever kill a serial killer, ever. No matter what you do. Especially if they have a prop that makes them easily identifiable and somewhat memorable (i.e. hockey mask, or finger blades). Also, you should never have sex with a hot girl in the vicinity of said serial killer, or you'll be the first to get popped, most likely while you do her.
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JBGRAY
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« Reply #62 on: September 28, 2012, 03:16:52 PM » |
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You can blow up cars, planes, and helicopters merely by shooting a few rounds into it with a handgun.
Navy SEALs are typically cooks assigned to Navy ships.
Women can fight upwards to 20 men completely unscathed.....and then pose dramatically as the last man falls down dead.
Governors, athletes, and other high profile persons like to visit prisons often and walk among the inmate population.
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Army of One
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« Reply #63 on: September 28, 2012, 03:20:47 PM » |
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Fixed.
Fixed John Travolta, Tom Cruise, Hugh Jackman, George Clooney, Kevin Spacey, Keanu Reeves,Jeremy Reneir, Vin Diesel etc etc etc etc are Heterosexual
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BigCyp
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« Reply #64 on: September 28, 2012, 03:26:52 PM » |
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The detectives ALWAYS, ALWAYS have to go interrogate the guy moving crates from one pile to another pile 10 feet away, in order to solve the crime.
Hahaha yes! |
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Army of One
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« Reply #65 on: September 28, 2012, 03:31:54 PM » |
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Murder Detectives always have a 100% crime solving rate
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dr.chimps
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« Reply #66 on: September 28, 2012, 03:35:59 PM » |
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You can blow up cars, planes, and helicopters merely by shooting a few rounds into it with a handgun.
Navy SEALs are typically cooks assigned to Navy ships.
Women can fight upwards to 20 men completely unscathed.....and then pose dramatically as the last man falls down dead.
Governors, athletes, and other high profile persons like to visit prisons often and walk among the inmate population.
OK, Casey. |
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BOW
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« Reply #67 on: September 28, 2012, 03:39:32 PM » |
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as a normal human you can get hit through wooden walls, concrete pillars,etc. by beings and creatures of immense strength without any major damage to yourself even though they can fuck the shit out of a car.
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Army of One
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« Reply #68 on: September 28, 2012, 03:42:21 PM » |
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Bodybuilders get women in bars
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ukjeff
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« Reply #69 on: September 28, 2012, 03:43:35 PM » |
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Spidermans Aunt May can get thrown off buildings and smacked to kingdom come, yet real grannies trip up and are in bed for a month.
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bike nut
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« Reply #70 on: September 28, 2012, 03:43:47 PM » |
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A Sicilian cannot refuse a request on his daughter's wedding day.
Some people call it a slingblade.
Toe Blake played old time hockey.
The secret to clear eyesight is asking Mick to cut you.
You can outrun a Terminator, they're horribly pigeon-toed.
Apparently icebergs are bigger up close.
I would bang the living snot out of a six foot tall blue chick that flies on a large bird.
Don't invite anyone named John McLean to one of your parties.
You can build a small nuclear reactor in a cave in Afghanistan.
No one will recognize you with a black mask and a small amount of eye liner.
Never take a job tending mountain sheep with another man.
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garebear
Time Out
Getbig V
Gender: 
Posts: 6525
Never question my instincts.
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« Reply #71 on: September 28, 2012, 04:43:14 PM » |
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Never trust the bagman.
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G
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doison
Getbig IV
Gender:
Posts: 2368
Rum Ham
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« Reply #72 on: September 28, 2012, 06:07:01 PM » |
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If you are taking a brutal beating in a fight, you need to relax and remember the teachings of your martial arts master.
And possibly begin fighting with your eyes closed as flashbacks to your training overlay the fight scene. |
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Army of One
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« Reply #73 on: September 28, 2012, 06:12:15 PM » |
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And possibly begin fighting with your eyes closed as flashbacks to your training overlay the fight scene.
You are not a Tanaka! |
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arce1988
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« Reply #74 on: September 28, 2012, 08:00:53 PM » |
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Females always trip and fall down when they are running from a killer
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