That ain't shit, homie. This is the life of a rural Irishman such as myself - hard as flint, black as coal, been in the bog a thousand yeeeaaaaar
4am: rise and brush my teeth and have a few swigs of Jameson, ready for the day
4.30am: swim across crocodile infested lakes with snipers in the trees to get to my land to milk the cows
8am: navigate my way back past through the lava and quick sand, a good 15 mile hike
10am: cut turf - good manual labour and great for conditioning - 5 hours of that and I start to break a sweat
3.30pm: few pints of guinness for nutrition and a pint glass of brandy to wash it down
5pm: shower and put on my sunday best, my favourite aran sweater and tweed hat and hit the local watering hole (pub)
4am: fall out door of local after 30 pints of stout, few gallons of whiskey and a quart of brandy
Sunday: puke my soul out all day long and go to the local for a cure about 7pm and fall out again about 2-3am
All in a good day's work