I'm collecting Unemployment and it feels fantabulous!

[The Idol]

I rise from bed at 10 AM, make the coffee and return to the bed to sip my mug o' joe and review the internet on my Galaxy. I then fall into a light nap and get up at around noon. I have an EBT card, free health insurance, fuel and electricity assistance, and, of course, a free weekly paycheck. All I have to do is apply for 3 jobs a week, which I do on Monster.com. I am eating well and work out on the regular. I can even afford creatine and whey protein. I visit malls, book stores, etc. I go to strip joints, but because I am on a fixed income, NO LAP DANCES. Just staring. Life is good.

[Coach is Back!]

Which explains why you have all day to stalk me for all these years with gimmick after gimmick..hahaha.

[Twaddle]

What's your retirement plan look like?  

[Coach is Back!]

What's your retirement plan look like?  

Obama has it all planned out for him. lol

[Powerlift66]

Typical loser...

[The Idol]

I may not be getting rich, but the relaxation, peace of mind and sense of well being is priceless. Time is my friend.

[Twaddle]

Typical loser getbigger...

Fixed!

[The Idol]

Go ahead and work, while I enjoy another bowl of ice cream, which YOU helped pay for. Thank you, I love you all.

[deadpan]

what happens when one of those jobs accept you? or do you apply to jobs you know you have no chance of getting? isn't there some sort of oversight for that kind of thing?

[usmcdevildoc]

Another "entitled", sucking off the tit of society.

DOC
Lift, fuck, make money

[The Idol]

and you cannot even invite a woman to dinner or a night out.

good "job"


you will soon realize life being skint sucks and having no perspectives sucks even more.

1 or 2 weeks holidays in sunny spain?

forget about it.

keep going

But you have brown teeth, and I don't.

[The Idol]

Another "entitled", sucking off the tit of society.

DOC
Lift, fuck, make money

Well, if you were a Marine then you were willing to lay down your life just so a guy like me could waltz his EBT card up to the grocery for more frozen pizza and ice cream. Thank you for your service.

[Frank Clairmonte]

this thread is priceless.

[reppingfor20]

I rise from bed at 10 AM, make the coffee and return to the bed to sip my mug o' joe and review the internet on my Galaxy. I then fall into a light nap and get up at around noon. I have an EBT card, free health insurance, fuel and electricity assistance, and, of course, a free weekly paycheck. All I have to do is apply for 3 jobs a week, which I do on Monster.com. I am eating well and work out on the regular. I can even afford creatine and whey protein. I visit malls, book stores, etc. I go to strip joints, but because I am on a fixed income, NO LAP DANCES. Just staring. Life is good.

good for you bro glad you are happy and i do not begrudge paying for your lifestyle as i know only a very small amount of my paycheck goes to you maybe a penny.

great post very motivational more people need to live like you.

[reppingfor20]

what happens when one of those jobs accept you? or do you apply to jobs you know you have no chance of getting? isn't there some sort of oversight for that kind of thing?

he can just ignore it ue doesnt keep good records.

[38-26-40]

I rise from bed at 10 AM, make the coffee and return to the bed to sip my mug o' joe and review the internet on my Galaxy. I then fall into a light nap and get up at around noon. I have an EBT card, free health insurance, fuel and electricity assistance, and, of course, a free weekly paycheck. All I have to do is apply for 3 jobs a week, which I do on Monster.com. I am eating well and work out on the regular. I can even afford creatine and whey protein. I visit malls, book stores, etc. I go to strip joints, but because I am on a fixed income, NO LAP DANCES. Just staring. Life is good.

Lol "just staring"

Everything on this page is hilarious...and very entertaining! Thank you

[arce1988]

 

[Irongrip400]

Benny, what if everybody thought like this, how would anyone live?

[Coach is Back!]

good for you bro glad you are happy and i do not begrudge paying for your lifestyle as i know only a very small amount of my paycheck goes to you maybe a penny.

great post very motivational more people need to live like you.

You don't pay for shit, your parents do. In order to pay for something you have to have a job. Comprehend?

[reppingfor20]

your always good for a laugh coach 

[The Idol]

i can afford to have them bleached,you dont.

but it doesnt even matter whether you have teeth at all or not, youre on standby for basicaly the entire female population.

you wont get closer to women than the cashier where you bring your foodstamps, or the employeees at umemployed offices or pictures on a screen.

in the long run, you might aswell kill yourself

[reppingfor20]

haha good post im sure the idol is pulling mad pussy good body all alpha bitches are attracted to him like a magnet.

[jude2]

I rise from bed at 10 AM, make the coffee and return to the bed to sip my mug o' joe and review the internet on my Galaxy. I then fall into a light nap and get up at around noon. I have an EBT card, free health insurance, fuel and electricity assistance, and, of course, a free weekly paycheck. All I have to do is apply for 3 jobs a week, which I do on Monster.com. I am eating well and work out on the regular. I can even afford creatine and whey protein. I visit malls, book stores, etc. I go to strip joints, but because I am on a fixed income, NO LAP DANCES. Just staring. Life is good.

How much is unemployment pay per week, serious question.

[che]

How much is unemployment pay per week, serious question.

It depends on how much money you make , mine $610 before taxes .

[The Idol]

How much is unemployment pay per week, serious question.

50% of your previous gross pay. Not a bad deal if you learn how to economize and like to take naps.