Self-Centered/Selfish women

[Dago_Joe]

I don't see the problem here.  All women are this way.   Period.  They all need CONSTANT validation and attention.  CONTINUOUS, RELENTLESS, SOUL-DRAINING ATTENTION.  

I crashed my car a while ago and got a massive cut on my head with a concussion to boot and my gf was furious at me for not calling to tell her I was going to be late!  Sorry, I was in hospital trying to stay conscious while i was getting stitches in my head, honey I will try to be more considerate to YOUR FUCKING NEEDS.   She is smoking hot btw.  Smokinggggg hott. (read:  the only reason i put up with her bullshit selfishness).

I am old enough now to accept that this is how all women are and it will never change.  Either get castrated or deal with it, if she is that hot its totally worth it.

[Danimal77]

Well, it doesn't matter anymore. This is what she texted me last night (I just checked her texts now):

"Well, I guess we won't be talking. Not really sure if I'm up for this relationship. I think I'm tired of trying to fix this when I shouldn't be trying to fix something that's just me. If you can't accept that I can't connect and don't communicate then that's your choice."

She left it at that.

I could probably call her in a couple of days and she would probably change her mind, but her text basically says, hey, I don't want to put in any effort. Either you accept that or not, OR, she's just being insecure and trying to tell herself that she's not so bad and it's my loss if I can't see the good in her. I feel bad and am worried that I might be ruining my chance with her, but if I take her off the hook this quickly, then I give in too quickly. Have to sit this one out. Probably not right to ignore her last text, but I didn't see anything in it that says she WANTS this to work. She sees I'm not happy with her lack of effort, so it looks like she's willing to walk, knowing that I would eventually anyways.

A lot of people on here are saying that she's just insecure and I could work with that and make her crazy for me. Other's are saying dump her azz. Looks like she sort of did the latter with me last night. Probably her trying to get me to chase her. Not doing that right away.

[temple_of_dis]

pics?

she better not be a shorty with 0 tits bro...

[Danimal77]

I don't see the problem here.  All women are this way.   Period.  They all need CONSTANT validation and attention.  CONTINUOUS, RELENTLESS, SOUL-DRAINING ATTENTION.  

I crashed my car a while ago and got a massive cut on my head with a concussion to boot and my gf was furious at me for not calling to tell her I was going to be late!  Sorry, I was in hospital trying to stay conscious while i was getting stitches in my head, honey I will try to be more considerate to YOUR FUCKING NEEDS.   She is smoking hot btw.  Smokinggggg hott. (read:  the only reason i put up with her bullshit selfishness).

I am old enough now to accept that this is how all women are and it will never change.  Either get castrated or deal with it, if she is that hot its totally worth it.

SO, based on what she wrote me last night: "Well, I guess we won't be talking. Not really sure if I'm up for this relationship. I think I'm tired of trying to fix this when I shouldn't be trying to fix something that's just me. If you can't accept that I can't connect and don't communicate then that's your choice."

How would you handle it?

[Parker]

SO, based on what she wrote me last night: "Well, I guess we won't be talking. Not really sure if I'm up for this relationship. I think I'm tired of trying to fix this when I shouldn't be trying to fix something that's just me. If you can't accept that I can't connect and don't communicate then that's your choice."

How would you handle it?

I find it odd that she wrote this and that she didn't say this in person...Ahh, 21st century romances lack the personal touch, don't they.

She admits it right there that she cannot connect or communicate (could this be a downfall of her other relationships. This is learned behavior)...
It's beyond you, it is her, and she already recognizes the issue, but she doesn't see it as a problem.
Roll out...

[Danimal77]

1) Totally out of line for her to come at you for choosing your sister.

2) Girls like this can be a nice change of pace.  Sit back and relax, don't take it too seriously.  Enjoy the ride.  You don't have to be "in charge".   You don't have to run things.  Just enjoy dinner and let her talk.  And keep your eyes  open for the next one.

So 240, what would you write back to this text she sent me last night: 

"Well, I guess we won't be talking. Not really sure if I'm up for this relationship. I think I'm tired of trying to fix this when I shouldn't be trying to fix something that's just me. If you can't accept that I can't connect and don't communicate then that's your choice."

How would you handle that? Would you wait a couple of days to reply and let it simmer for a bit?

[phreak]

SO, based on what she wrote me last night: "Well, I guess we won't be talking. Not really sure if I'm up for this relationship. I think I'm tired of trying to fix this when I shouldn't be trying to fix something that's just me. If you can't accept that I can't connect and don't communicate then that's your choice."

How would you handle it?

I would handle it by not being a pussy-whipped phaggot, and read her message for what it is: She is literally admitting that she is defective and does not want to do anything about it. You are not worth the effort to her, by her own admission.

So get back together for one fuck session, take pics, post them everywhere, then dump her.

[Danimal77]

I would handle it by not being a pussy-whipped phaggot, and read her message for what it is: She is literally admitting that she is defective and does not want to do anything about it. You are not worth the effort to her, by her own admission.

So get back together for one fuck session, take pics, post them everywhere, then dump her.

If I had made her feel good about herself and had been very critical, she would be more drawn to me and would feel I was worth more the effort. It's an investment. She already felt low and that's where that text came from. If I was the guy who smiled and didn't complain about her selfishness until the last day and consequently then came as a shock to her, she would be willing to fight to keep me around. I weened her off me by constantly being critical of her selfishness, while not balancing it with enough emotional fulfillment. I could turn that around, but how to while still keeping my balllls in check?

[Dago_Joe]

SO, based on what she wrote me last night: "Well, I guess we won't be talking. Not really sure if I'm up for this relationship. I think I'm tired of trying to fix this when I shouldn't be trying to fix something that's just me. If you can't accept that I can't connect and don't communicate then that's your choice."

How would you handle it?

Baiting you.  She is trying to see how far she can push you and how you will respond.  If you give in and apologize for hurting her feelings or whatever, she will have your balls on her mantle.  She wants you to apologize to her even though you did nothing wrong because that way SHE BECOMES THE VICTIM.  You are now the bad boyfriend and she is so hurt by how insensitive you are. DO NOT FALL FOR THIS TRICK!! 

[Danimal77]

I find it odd that she wrote this and that she didn't say this in person...Ahh, 21st century romances lack the personal touch, don't they.

She admits it right there that she cannot connect or communicate (could this be a downfall of her other relationships. This is learned behavior)...
It's beyond you, it is her, and she already recognizes the issue, but she doesn't see it as a problem.
Roll out...

No, she wanted to talk and asked me if we could talk. I didn't answer her and 2-3 hours later (her impatience got to her), she sent me the text I pasted.

She only doesn't see it as a problem imo because I was more critical of her behavior than I provided emotional fulfillment (to make her feel I was worth the effort).

[Danimal77]

Baiting you.  She is trying to see how far she can push you and how you will respond.  If you give in and apologize for hurting her feelings or whatever, she will have your balls on her mantle.  She wants you to apologize to her even though you did nothing wrong because that way SHE BECOMES THE VICTIM.  You are now the bad boyfriend and she is so hurt by how insensitive you are. DO NOT FALL FOR THIS TRICK!! 

So, how would you handle it to turn it around? Again, I sensed more a level of indifference in her text from 24 hours ago. BTW, she never went longer than 2-3 hours without texting me, so she must be pretty steadfast in her conviction by having gone 24 hours now.

Would you let her sit on it for a couple more days and then do something small? If so, what (without handing my balls over to her on a silver platter)?

[Tito24]

[Danimal77]

The irony is she has it right now 

[Dago_Joe]

So, how would you handle it to turn it around? Again, I sensed more a level of indifference in her text from 24 hours ago. BTW, she never went longer than 2-3 hours without texting me, so she must be pretty steadfast in her conviction by having gone 24 hours now.

Would you let her sit on it for a couple more days and then do something small? If so, what (without handing my balls over to her on a silver platter)?

Depends.  If she is really hot and you enjoy being with her more than you are annoyed, then call her up and tell her what you really feel.  Girls are annoying.  Period.  But they are also lots of fun and the whole sex thing, remember?  Being alone and whacking your pud is not as fun as going out with a hot whore and banging her constantly.  You gotta weigh the two options on your own.  I don't know what you feel about her.  You will never find a girl that does not annoy you and bitch.  That is what they do.  They will mindfuck you, but I think its all worth it overall.  Some guys don't.  Decide for yourself mang.

[Ronnie Rep]

Use her for sex for as long as you can with minimal time investment and date other women in the meanwhile.

This X 10! This chick probably has a ton of baggage and will make you miserable!

[38-26-40]

Wow! She admits to not connecting or communicating? Lol at least she admits it, but you should know that lack of communication in a relationship is bad. You shouldn't accept it.

At least you found out sooner than later. Enjoy your New Year with a fresh start.

[38-26-40]

I know how women think.

She's trying now to get you to chase.

You can easily take control and she'll be begging for your forgiveness...but ONLY if she really wants you. That's a chance you'll have to take.

You should get your side of the story in with her as well. If she cares, she will listen, realize she was out of line, apologize and want to continue with you. However, she might not find anything wrong with what she did, not apologize and use the same "accept me or don't" line. That's when you should walk. Because again, lack of communication is not good in any relationship and you shouldn't be accepting of that. Think about it. I wanna know what happens.

[Danimal77]

Depends.  If she is really hot and you enjoy being with her more than you are annoyed, then call her up and tell her what you really feel.  Girls are annoying.  Period.  But they are also lots of fun and the whole sex thing, remember?  Being alone and whacking your pud is not as fun as going out with a hot whore and banging her constantly.  You gotta weigh the two options on your own.  I don't know what you feel about her.  You will never find a girl that does not annoy you and bitch.  That is what they do.  They will mindfuck you, but I think its all worth it overall.  Some guys don't.  Decide for yourself mang.

I already told her how I feel, hence her text from last night. I just think she's feeling rejected and she's already insecure, and so she's playing the victim and looking for me to chase after her, to boost her bruised ego. She already knows how I feel about her selfish actions.

[Mrdibbs]

Well, it doesn't matter anymore. This is what she texted me last night (I just checked her texts now):

"Well, I guess we won't be talking. Not really sure if I'm up for this relationship. I think I'm tired of trying to fix this when I shouldn't be trying to fix something that's just me. If you can't accept that I can't connect and don't communicate then that's your choice."

She left it at that.

I could probably call her in a couple of days and she would probably change her mind, but her text basically says, hey, I don't want to put in any effort. Either you accept that or not, OR, she's just being insecure and trying to tell herself that she's not so bad and it's my loss if I can't see the good in her. I feel bad and am worried that I might be ruining my chance with her, but if I take her off the hook this quickly, then I give in too quickly. Have to sit this one out. Probably not right to ignore her last text, but I didn't see anything in it that says she WANTS this to work. She sees I'm not happy with her lack of effort, so it looks like she's willing to walk, knowing that I would eventually anyways.

A lot of people on here are saying that she's just insecure and I could work with that and make her crazy for me. Other's are saying dump her azz. Looks like she sort of did the latter with me last night. Probably her trying to get me to chase her. Not doing that right away.

Lol dude what she's basically saying is ''my personality is like this, you can't change me''.

You're just dating a superficial girl. A girl like that just needs a guy who just japs about himself the wholeday as well. They both will never notice they're talking to themselves basically and there won't be any problem.

So just as many have said before use her for sex and play the game. If she really makes you puke because she disrespects your family fuck it dump her ass.

The fact is you hate her personality but yet you are VERY keen on keeping her. You're attached and thats mainly because of looks. You just want to have a pretty girl and mold her into the personality form of your ideal woman. It doesn't work like that.

Since you're allready melting it displays you can't handle ''playing the game''. Best move is to get very intoxicated with her (choose substance that fits you best) and fuck her brains out one last time.

[SF1900]

Well, it doesn't matter anymore. This is what she texted me last night (I just checked her texts now):

"Well, I guess we won't be talking. Not really sure if I'm up for this relationship. I think I'm tired of trying to fix this when I shouldn't be trying to fix something that's just me. If you can't accept that I can't connect and don't communicate then that's your choice."

She left it at that.

I could probably call her in a couple of days and she would probably change her mind, but her text basically says, hey, I don't want to put in any effort. Either you accept that or not, OR, she's just being insecure and trying to tell herself that she's not so bad and it's my loss if I can't see the good in her. I feel bad and am worried that I might be ruining my chance with her, but if I take her off the hook this quickly, then I give in too quickly. Have to sit this one out. Probably not right to ignore her last text, but I didn't see anything in it that says she WANTS this to work. She sees I'm not happy with her lack of effort, so it looks like she's willing to walk, knowing that I would eventually anyways.

A lot of people on here are saying that she's just insecure and I could work with that and make her crazy for me. Other's are saying dump her azz. Looks like she sort of did the latter with me last night. Probably her trying to get me to chase her. Not doing that right away.

The part bolded in red says it all. People that use the excuse, "That is who I am, I will not change for anyone" are immature and stupid.

Life is about accepting feedback and growing. We all could use some good feedback in order to become better people. Who would want to accept being selfish and self-centered. IF anything, she should be taking your feedback seriously and trying to change. It sounds like something a 15 year old would say, "I am not changing for anyone."  

Granted, I do not mean we have to change completely who we are just to make people happy. But the fact of the matter is that life is about growth and change. Its about accepting feedback with humility, incorporating the feedback we receive, and becoming better.

She is dumb. Dump her.

[Danimal77]

I know how women think.

She's trying now to get you to chase.

You can easily take control and she'll be begging for your forgiveness...but ONLY if she really wants you. That's a chance you'll have to take.

You should get your side of the story in with her as well. If she cares, she will listen, realize she was out of line, apologize and want to continue with you. However, she might not find anything wrong with what she did, not apologize and use the same "accept me or don't" line. That's when you should walk. Because again, lack of communication is not good in any relationship and you shouldn't be accepting of that. Think about it. I wanna know what happens.

Unfortunately you're thinking like a logical, rational and mature adult (a male). This woman and MOST women are immature and irrational when it comes to this. This one especially. The only reason she is admitting to her flaws and not apologizing for them, is because I've more than brought them to her attention, which has turned her feelings colder (based on last night's take it or leave it text and NO follow up since).

The only way for her to want to put in that effort (she may not), is to give her the reassurance that I care about her (which she did not do for me last night) and then when she feels placated I will gain some browny points and she might then want to make the effort.

[Pray_4_War]

Best thing to do is tell her your concerns.  Be honest about it and see what she says.  You gotta start with a positive comment to keep her off the defense. 

If she doesn't respond to what you are saying then you have to make buttsex with her best friend(female).  Then text your girl the photos and be like "Yeah bitch, who's selfish now?  Fuck you hoe". 

Hope this helps.

[Danimal77]

The part bolded in red says it all. People that use the excuse, "That is who I am, I will not change for anyone" are immature and stupid.

Life is about accepting feedback and growing. We all could use some good feedback in order to become better people. Who would want to accept being selfish and self-centered. IF anything, she should be taking your feedback seriously and trying to change. It sounds like something a 15 year old would say, "I am not changing for anyone."  

Granted, I do not mean we have to change completely who we are just to make people happy. But the fact of the matter is that life is about growth and change. Its about accepting feedback with humility, incorporating the feedback we receive, and becoming better.

She is dumb. Dump her.

I of course was thinking the same thing. She hasn't chased me at all after last night's take it or leave it text, so that says either a lot about her commitment level, or it says she doesn't want to feel like she's walking on eggshells with everything she says. I think if you hammer someone too much, too often about their flaws, you get her reaction. There's a time and a place and a way to bring things up.

She most definitely is extremely immature (hence the excessive self-absorbed behavior).

[flinstones1]

Nah, it's cool bro. I appreciate the honesty. It's messed up, but she has this other AMAZING side to her, where she's extremely warm, sweet, complimenting and affectionate (which you don't find that much in chicks anymore), YET, there's that selfish/me me me side of her, like a fucking Jekyll and Hyde.

For now...your just her flavor of the month.

[Danimal77]

Lol dude what she's basically saying is ''my personality is like this, you can't change me''.

You're just dating a superficial girl. A girl like that just needs a guy who just japs about himself the wholeday as well. They both will never notice they're talking to themselves basically and there won't be any problem.

So just as many have said before use her for sex and play the game. If she really makes you puke because she disrespects your family fuck it dump her ass.

The fact is you hate her personality but yet you are VERY keen on keeping her. You're attached and thats mainly because of looks. You just want to have a pretty girl and mold her into the personality form of your ideal woman. It doesn't work like that.

Since you're allready melting it displays you can't handle ''playing the game''. Best move is to get very intoxicated with her (choose substance that fits you best) and fuck her brains out one last time.

HA. I like your reply. It nails it on the head in all areas.

So, to clear up something, I'm not just keen on keeping her around (until something better comes along) because of her looks. She also give a lot of attention, says sweet things and is warm and affectionate (when she's not only talking about herself), which is nice. Unfortunately, with one comes the other. They are not mutually exclusive.

The part where you said she doesn't notice how she just talks to herself is now in the open. I made her aware. It takes a mature and selfless person to want to change that ugly characteristic that clearly pushes people away. Why she doesn't want to do it, is because I've been giving her more bad than good lately and it's all about pros and cons and what we see as benefits. I've lowered my value by letting her know how much her behavior affects me, when I could have said nothing and just distanced myself from her (which she may not have even noticed) and then when I'm approached, I could have said something.

Slow and easy wasn't my approach with dealing with her issues. She's now rebelling against it.