Public health issue. You're ok with restrictions on smoking, drinking. Ok with requiring a script from a doctor for prescription drugs. You're ok with restrictions on driving, flying a plane. On and on.
You want to keep your guns to protect you from the government? Ask a Yemeni wedding party how that's working out.
There needs to be a law that says you must wear a condom for any and all male involved sexual relations including heterosexual, homosexual and masturbation. The Feds can bust your door down to make certain you're obeying this law. Only condoms can save the world from STDs. Don't like it? Too bad.
Let the battle cry be sounded. Penises kill.
And don't go telling us all about your right to the "pursuit of fappiness", kid.
Yeah...This is what you sound like to a reasonable human being.