That's right! Grown men with responsibilities to others do not have "their own life". The whole concept of "own life" are for those who should remain single and do as they damn please! Once you establish strong connections with other human beings, there is no "own life" as a relationship, even a close friendship, is a two-way concept. Same goes for taking care of older relatives. If one wants their own life, then he can go to a remote island. My wife is part of my life. And so will my future kids. It will be OUR lives.
Ok?
Obviously, plenty of good men, love being devoted fathers.
BUT, selfless , genuine LOVE can take different forms as you pointed out.
Believe it or not, I recently spent 2 weeks at my mother's side as she faded away from this earth.
It wasn't fun, but it was one of the most meaningful experiences of my life.
My wife and I were there at her time of need out of love , pure and simple.
Nobody made me do it and I felt honored to be the one she wanted at her side during this time.
I don't need a medal or pat on the back to make me feel good about my actions.
I wanted to do it, so with my Mom's blessing , I did. That's all that matters in my book.
If someone wants to raise kids and loves doing it, that's great.
What bugs me, is how some act "morally superior" to childless by choice couples ( like me/wife).