"TOP TEN QUALIFICATIONS TO WRITE FOR MUSCULAR DEVELOPMENT
1. Missing at least one kidney.
2. Must meet requirement of one felony conviction or two misdemeanor convictions or three outstanding warrants.
3. Cannot locate "truth" in dictionary or own vocabulary.
4. Minimum of one appearance on cable television wearing dopey chef hat.
5. Must have tried anabolic steroids with either no noticeable improvement or 3 Arnold Classic wins.
6. MUST HATE WOMEN...LOVE TAKING DUMPS...BE PALS WITH DRUG DEALERS...USE ALL CAPS
7. Must pretend to believe that non-steroid supplements work.
8. Great imagination required for magazine that uses cartoons instead of photos.
9. Epitestosterone:Testosterone ratio of 12:1 or higher.
10. Negative letters of reference from no less than five previous employers."
Obviously, Im not qualified to write for MD.
