LOL!!! That's actually funny, and it [plus R.A.M.'s post below yours] leads into another funny story:
I have mentioned [or whined about] here and there on Getbig that I have stopped talking to all new women [that I refuse to meet any new women - period, end of]. I did this starting January 1st, 2019, as a new year's resolution of sorts. This was because of wretched, gaslighting, complete slut, drug-addicted [opiates and benzos] piece of garbage I was seeing from around Early April of 2018, and ending by the time October 2018 rolled around. And she was out of my life by 2019-01-01, which is when I decided no new women EVER again.
Just take this example - she needed money to help get over her previous boyfriend, which included me buying her a queen size bed, among other things. When I realized she had been using money on drugs [opiates - specifically Percocet], and was 10 days into a bender on them, I calmly/politely told her that had to stop.
Three days later, she asked me again. I lost my sh*t. Money had NOTHING to do with it. I never held back from spending anything on her. I simply didn't want her to potentially become addicted to drugs [likely to have already at the least started] because of access to my money. I put my foot down in a stern way [which was swollen to the size of my shoe, and I had to go check it out at the Emergency Room later that night], and she started crying. Because the lying sack of sh*t had "PTSD" from her previous ex-boyfriend, I couldn't give her a hug because I thought that would be pushing boundaries [later, I found that the b*tch had watched every rape-themed porn movie on my Amazon Prime account - and with that information, was able to get her to admit she watches ACTUAL rape porn]. Meanwhile, she was telling me how delicate she was, from years of being abused by men [AND she later told me, while drunk, that she slept with over 30+ men, and she was not yet 30 by the time of this happening].
The next day after telling her I would not be giving her more money that would ultimately go to fuel a growing drug habit, she said "If you talk to me like that, we can't advance as a couple."
Here's the thing, and here's what's so INSANE about this entire incident - I have only been "in love" twice in my life: once in high school in 2000 [age 18] which ended DISASTROUSLY, and then this incident, 18 years later [age 36] in 2018.
Had this been any other time with any other woman, and a woman essentially said "You need to give me money to buy drugs or we can't "advance as a couple" or "advance our relationship" " or whatever she said, I would have said "GO F*CK YOURSELF. GTFO of my house, and come back when you are opiate-free, you piece of shit.
Then later, when it was clear she didn't want to be with me, I said [given that I was "in love" with her, which I now DEFINITIVELY see is no different than eating tacos, from the perspective of your brain chemistry], "When you said you didn't want to be with me, I guess I was happy you still needed to depend on me, because at least I got to see you."
Somehow, this garbage piece of sh*t human said "I have absolutely no doubt that you would have purposely made me depend on you for money for drugs, so that I would therefore be depending on on."
I was like "B*TCH - IF THAT WAS THE CASE, WHY WOULDN'T I HAVE INSISTED WE FUCK - YOU SPENT $20,000 OF MY MONEY AND WE DIDN'T EVEN HOLD HANDS BY THE TIME I HIT THE 10K MARK, AND MY MENTAL HEALTH WAS COLLAPSING OVER IT. I COULD INSISTED WE FUCK, OR YOU WOULD HAVE *HAD* TO GO INTO OPIATE WITHDRAWAL, BUT I DIDN'T DO THAT, YOU PIECE OF SH*T. AND THE FOUR MOST RECENT WOMEN I WAS SLEEPING WITH, I WASN'T TALKING TO, BECAUSE I WAS WAITING TO SEE WHERE THINGS WENT WITH US."
[plot twist: being annoyed with this whole situation, I fucked all four of those women in August of 2018 - but the POINT is, had I been "taking advantage" of her via her depending on me for money, wouldn't it have made sense that I used it to get sex from her? In reality, we didn't even kiss or hold hands...she even said "after me spending $10K on her "Do you think spending money on me entitles you to hold my hand?"
I was like "WTF?!" No, I didn't think "spending money" somehow entitles a man to intimacy with a woman, but I THINK SPENDING $10,000 ON SOMEONE AND GOING COMPLETELY OUT OF YOUR WAY TO HELP AN ALLEGEDLY BATTERED WOMAN START HER LIFE AGAIN AFTER BUYING HER A QUEEN SIZE BED AND BEING HER SHOULDER TO CRY ON DAY AFTER DAY WHILE DRIVING HER EVERYWHERE AND FOREGOING RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHER WOMEN, WHEN THE WOMAN YOU ARE DOING THAT FOR EXPLICITLY SAID SHE IS INTERESTED IN YOU AND INTERESTING IN SEEING IF THINGS WILL WORK ENTITLES A MAN TO AT LEAST HOLD HER HAND TO GET THE MINIMUM PEACE OF MIND NEEDED TO KNOW HE ISN'T BEING USED FOR MONEY.
Also, having seen her reply to a post on "Feminist Daily" on Facebook, I asked if she was a Facebook, stating that if she was, we could not talk. She then posted about Rape Culture, and that should have been it. And normally, that WOULD have been it - and this is why I NEVER want to fall in love again, and this is why I will simply never meet any new women ever again - it's simply not worth the risk of falling in love with another piece of sh*t leach like her.
I mean - I can understand a woman being like "No, you can't f*ck me after just buying me lunch." But to do everything in my power to ameliorate this woman's life and for her to deny HAND-HOLDING, which I only even asked for to get the peace of mind to know I wasn't being used...I think THAT is more than reasonable to ask for. And to think I had female friends over the year I could have been sleeping with all the way through but I was holding out for her.
It just boggles my mind to think - what are the odds that both the woman I cared about more and did more for than ANY other woman in my life also happened to be the woman who did the LEAST for me, and took advantage of me in the most egregious way? I can't pretend that me getting women has been much of a challenge in my adult life, because it hasn't been. And yet THIS happened to me...it's so strange.
Oh...then later I found out she was with some bum. On his Facebook, he was saying he couldn't pay back to a $264 tax bill because he spent the money on groceries, and that at the very least, he should be allowed to pay it back in two lump sums, since he got it in two lump sums. I sent her a text, and at first she denied that her boyfriend had a Facebook [which was technically true, because this was an account he used a few years earlier...what a coincidence though - same name, same occupation, same mutual friends, LMAO]. So then I said "Oh hey, well I read on your boyfriend's old Facebook account that he's in a bit of a rut right now. Does your boyfriend need my help buying his groceries?" LMAO...and she LOST HER SH*T.
HAHAHAHAHAHA, all along, the f*cking loser was just looking for a man to control. But she kept giving me one stupid reason after another for not dating me. Oh - and being racist online was possibly the biggest reason. But ultimately, had I just agreed to stop posting "controversial posts" [unlikely I would do that for a woman unless we were having children or something], the issue would have still been that I have my own house, car, rack of trophies from lightweight strongman contests, two university degrees and two minors [she's a janitor], etc. And ultimately she was looking for a man who was "beneath" her.
For perspective, when she told her new boyfriend that she wanted to get married, he was a bit reserved about it. She said "I can just get another boyfriend then", and then apparently he had flowers delivered to her work. HAHAHAHA, what a f*cking loser.
WHO SAYS THAT TO THEIR SPOUSE DURING THE HONEYMOON PHASE?! I mean, how much must someone care about you in order to say that?
Likewise, I was treated terribly by this b*tch, and I should have known better - but that's the issue with "love", or even thinking maybe you might be in love. It's a very dangerous emotion, IMO, and because I could NOT have done more for a person who could NOT have taken advantage of me more, I will NEVER meet a new woman ever again.
I AM ONLY NOW JUST RECOVERED! Admittedly, if not for COVID...I'd probably be killing it. In fact, things are going well for me in all areas BUT regular works [since they are not possible in Ontario right now].
Oh...and I spent $6,000 for this POS to reduce her Percocet addiction, and in the end, SHE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING TO REDUCE OR STOP. I later [July 2019] found out from a mutual friend that she had been addicted for FIVE YEARS!!! That means her guilt-trip comment about my essentially financing her addiction was even worse - it's like "B*TCH, YOU WERE ADDICTED FOR YEARS, *AND* YOU TOLD ME WE COULDN'T BE A COUPLE IF I DIDN'T CONTINUE TO GIVE YOU MONEY, AFTER I EXPLICITLY TOLD YOU I WANTED IT TO STOP, BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO BECOME ADDICTED."
To think of how many times I was sad because of something she said was my fault which was SOLELY OPIOID-WITHDRAWAL-RELATED. WOW.
She also asked me if she should tell her boyfriend that she uses Percocet. I was still naively of the mind that she wasn't addicted. I mean...she would always say she stopped for a few days, and on those days, get them elsewhere with her own money. I didn't know she was straight up hooked for 5+ years. I said that she wasn't obliged to tell him, if he just does them here and there. Later when I learned from the mutual friend the extent of her addiction, it was him who said "That's a horrible thing to bring into a relationship."
NO SH*T! Had I known that, it would have changed EVERYTHING. And she purposely made herself out like she didn't sleep with very many men too. She once asked me "If I got a vibrator, would that make me a bad person?" Later on I texted her that and said "Why are you worried about buying a vibrator? YOU F*CKED 30 GUYS!" LMAO @ this slut fucking everything with a dick in her twenties, and trying to pretend to me she was chaste.
Oh...and the "abusive boyfriend" was actually just fulfilling HER demands for BDSM, the sick f*ck. But conveniently, she failed to tell me any of that.

The fact is, I was lied to SO MUCH with this POS, that I will never, EVER meet a new woman ever again. I am just SO HAPPY I managed to recover from this with my life, because she drove me THAT insane. She was, without any doubt, the WORST thing to have ever happened to me. THE WORST. I guess when you care about someone, you are more vulnerable...and only to find out that she - this piece of garbage - was in a bad mood routinely because of opioid withdrawal? WOW! How many times did I believe her when she said it was something I did, and it was ONLY withdrawal that caused her mood swings. My mom met her with powder in her nose [from snorting Percocet], and she said "Anyone could tell she was an addict". I was like...uhh...if you see a drunk person, that doesn't tell you that they are an alcoholic, and if someone EXPLICITLY TELLS ME THEY ARE NOT ADDICTED, WTF am I supposed to think?
So yeah, my trust mechanism is now completely destroyed, and I cannot even FATHOM what I will do if any woman attempts to talk to me in person. I can barely stand when a woman at a store approaches me WITH REASON to tell me anything. I can't IMAGINE if any woman tries to push any conversation with me.
So the Cole's Notes are:
- Got treated like complete garbage by a leach.
- As of 2019-01-01, I stopped meeting new women F-O-R-E-V-E-R!!!
And in conclusion that is why it's easy for me to remember 2019-05-01 as the date I stopped watching porn forever.
I was talking to a friend who had told me multiple times that porn is a negative good. This was late April of 2019 - maybe April 24th.
From there, it was pretty easy to just make my start date for stop watching porn May 1st, and that is why I remember that date.

As to any Getbiggers who have girlfriends or wives...I admire you guys. Seriously, I do. But I don't know how you do it. Even the BEST women, from my experience, still demand a tremendous amount of resources, in order to fulfill them emotionally.
Women are just WAY to needy. And they complained about getting dick?

No, I mean - is that SERIOUSLY the biggest problem women have with men? "Oh, he tried to offer dick to me! He tried to give me an orgasm!"
HAHAHAHAHA! WOW. Complaining girls. Could you IMAGINE men going around "My girlfriend wants to suck my dick ALL THE TIME! Her pussy is wet, and she demands taking my dick 2-3 times a day! OH - THE HORROR!!!"
HAHAHAHA, and we believe these dumb b*tches when they complain about this!
I can tell you - I will NEVER meet a new woman ever again. There is a 0% chance I will ever meet a new woman, but there is a 5% chance I will murder one. So in case you're wondering about me being serious about never meeting a new woman ever again.
OH - I'M F*CKING SERIOUS.
I have about 15 female friends [my "girlfriends", as I call them], and I can't even tell you how much I LIKED women, before trying to devote to one. So here I was with female friends who I cared for, and was nice to, and got sex from any time, yet the first one [well - since the very short relationship I had in 2000] who I went out of my way for like no other...treated me worse than I can possibly describe, and has made me despise women so much that I look at them as less than human.
Never in my life did I do more for a human being, and never was I treated worse.
I can't even FATHOM taking $20,000 of someone's money, knowing they explicitly stated they cared about you, and asked you to give them the same assurance, and do nothing for them.
It would be akin to me being with a woman for 4-6 months, having her cook and clean from me, and say give me blowjobs daily, then say "I can't kiss you because I have PTSD over my ex", and continue to take these things from this woman, and then she asks just to hold hands to ensure I'm not using her, and finally she has a mental breakdown feeling taken advantage of.
ANYONE hearing such a story would say "That guy is a piece of trash for doing that."
Incidentally, I told two WAY HOTTER and younger women what happened, and the POS said "You shouldn't tell them what happened." I said "Why? You know I told them what happened in context, and that I would defend you." She replied "Yeah, but that makes me look like the villain."
What that means is that this piece of sh*t KNEW what she did was bad. Let me tell - at one point I sent this b*tch a text and said "Remember the time you implied I didn't provide enough for the first mother of my children [because at one time we got into a dispute where she had blocked me, so I couldn't send her spousal support which is NOT court-ordered, by the way, since I pay for 100% of my childrens' bills to begin with]. I should have never tolerated you saying that - implying I'm not doing my job as a dad. I should have split your f*cking head open over that."
YEP - THAT'S WHAT I SAID TO THIS PIECE OF SH*T, and I would have NO PROBLEM telling that to the world. THAT is how much of a piece of garbage this woman was.
Because I'm NOT ashamed of saying it - not at ALL. I actually SHOULD have given her a massive open-hand slap for what she did to me. Because her comment about how her actions "make her look like a villain" are indicative to me that she KNEW I was vulnerable and had feelings for her, and she was purposely doing everything she could to show me her worst side, because she had been abused in her life, and she was really just taking out her abuse on me.
Incidentally, a bit later, I was with a new girlfriend [LONG story how I met her, LOL, since I wasn't even meeting new women], and she was hot and amazing, and just wonderful...and I knew to make it clear from the very beginning that I had things I could offer her, but in my state of mind, it was not the ideal time to be in a relationship.
And what's the end result of that more recent relationship? Well - I knocked her up, but she miscarried in late 2019, unfortunately, but ultimately dumped me on August 1st of 2020 because I was still talking to other women [literally talking/texting - NOT seeing in person].
But at the end of the day, because she didn't take advantage of me, and because she knows I wasn't with those women sexually, we are still on good terms.
I am 100% certain we will get back together in the future.
Whereas that b*tch from 2018 was a straight-up parasite. You would just HAVE to know that a person is NEVER going to talk to you again if you use them to THAT extent. Again, could you imagine if I was accepting blowjobs from a woman DAILY for six months, then telling her "I can't kiss you because I'm still distraught over my previous breakup", and thinking that would end in ANY way except for that woman HATING YOU?
Part of why this situation makes no sense to me is because I just can't even fathom how a person would want to completely DESTROY a friendship with someone as hugely supportive as I am? I can tell you that I have one friend who is very worried about his health because heart disease runs in his family. Let me tell you - this guy means a lot to me, and I would hate to lose him. And I can't even fathom being in a situation where I take advantage of him to the point that he never wants to talk to me again.
Think of the person you did more for that any other person in your life. Now imagine that person doing everything they can to hate on you, be negative towards you, and treat you like garbage. Does that make ANY sense?
Hence why I will never meet a new woman ever again.
And I stopped watching porn because I want the remaining women in my life to be special to me. I want to actually be grateful to have them, and to not adapt my brain to scrolling over 20 thumbnails of different [fishy] vaginas to pick the best one, since that's NOT how it works in real life.
Again, I think porn in general is a negative good. I don't think my assessment is far off, but I could be wrong.
Either way, I will never be watching porn again - or meeting any new women EVER again. And I couldn't be happier about both decisions.