Getbig Bodybuilding, Figure and Fitness Forums
Getbig Main Boards => General Topics => Topic started by: Howard on August 28, 2014, 10:14:06 AM
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Background - I'm a 55 yr old former bodybuilding douchebag and been married 4x ( 3 divorces).
I'm currently happily married to wife #4 and learned some things the hard way LOL.
I teach physics and live in North Georgia.
Marriage
1.Partnership - Marriage is all about building a life with a loving PARTNER at your side. Both people need to work and have a stable career.
A man doesn't need to dominate and control his wife. He herds her along with gentle persuasion and by his own example.
BOTH people need to work and bring something to the table. It's the only way to be true partners and maintain mutual respect and dignity.
2. Age - Don't even think about getting married in your 20's.
a) age 35 is the minimum age anyone who doesn't really want kids to get married. 40 is even better, especially for men.
b) age 30 for a woman who wants to have kids with a mature man ( at least 30) who really wants to be a dad.
That's young enough to have a healthy , safe birth , BUT be mature enough to deal with the demands of parenthood.
3. Personal choice - Do NOT let religious doctrine or tradition rule your decisions when it comes to marriage.
a) I have a basic spiritual belief in GOD, but, I wouldn't let some Priest, Rabi or Pastor tell you, how you should live when married.
What's good for organized religion may NOT be in a married couple's personal interest.
For example, the catholic church is still against most forms of birth control , even for married couples. WTF!
b) Breaking marital traditions just to be different or obnoxious is dumb. For example, I thought that goofy choreographed dance , down the aisle video, was stupid and self serving to get attention. Blindly following tradition when it doesn't feel right is even worse then some goofy dance. For example, don't live beside parents or in-laws because "that's just what you do", could be marital disaster.
4. Having children - I never had kids and considered them to be a major source of work, money and stress . But that's me and many others feel blessed and rewarded by having children.
a. Too many people have kids by "accident". The man shoots his load into his girl , oops , and 9 months later a baby. That's careless and unfair to everyone involved. I used "withdrawal" to prevent unwanted pregnancy. I know what the naysayers think about withdrawal, but it's near impossible to get a girl pregnant IF you pull out 8-10 sec BEFORE ejaculation. Of course this assume the man can control his dick from shooting at will LOL. Being able to exhibit some basic dick control will make any man a much better lover.
b. Many couples get even closer when they PLAN the pregnancy and birth, etc. If a woman is with a man that isn't into being a dad, find another one to impregnate her or she should raise it on her own. If a woman tries to pressure or manipulate a man into getting her pregnant...RUN!
c. From what I've observed kids can be real marriage killers . The couple needs to work as a loving team to raise the kids. I've also heard it can be the both the most demanding and rewarding task anyone could take on. Having kids isn't a lukewarm deal, you will either love it or hate it for many years. Listen to your heart and if you have any doubts about having children...DON'T.
d. The terms "baby mama and baby daddy" make me cringe. This " whatever" attitude about pregnancy and parenting is dumb.
If you want kids, great, work together to raise the kids. If you don't want to be a parent, avoid getting a woman pregnant.
Humans are NOT animals,so use some self control and birth control.
5. Fidelity - If you want to screw around, don't get married. Just stay single or get divorced.
Don't give that , "it was an accident or mistake" crap when it comes to screwing around on your spouse.
An accident is slipping and falling. Unless you slipped and fell into her vavjaja, it was no mistake.
6. LIFE - My most cherished moments with my wife is when we just relax in bed watching some goofy show or movie , together.
Real life has many tedious times, for EVERYONE. Life and marriage isn't meant to be a amusement park. The key is to enjoy the basic stuff as much as the sex and fun times.
next up - SEX
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Whatever Howard says, do the opposite. Dude's been married four times...LOL
Just kidding, Howard...but really, guys, don't do as Howard does. :)
-
Background - I'm a 55 yr old former bodybuilding douchebag and been married 4x ( 3 divorces).
I'm currently happily married to wife #4 and learned some things the hard way LOL.
I teach physics at a moderate sized college and live in North Georgia.
Marriage
1.Partnership - Marriage is all about building a life with a loving PARTNER at your side. Both people need to work and have a stable career.
A man doesn't need to dominate and control his wife. He herds her along with gentle persuasion and by his own example.
BOTH people need to work and bring something to the table. It's the only way to be true partners and maintain mutual respect and dignity.
2. Age - Don't even think about getting married in your 20's.
a) age 35 is the minimum age anyone who doesn't really want kids to get married. 40 is even better, especially for men.
b) age 30 for a woman who wants to have kids with a mature man ( at least 30) who really wants to be a dad.
That's young enough to have a healthy , safe birth , BUT be mature enough to deal with the demands of parenthood.
3. Personal choice - Do NOT let religious doctrine or tradition rule your decisions when it comes to marriage.
a) I have a basic spiritual belief in GOD, but, I wouldn't let some Priest, Rabi or Pastor tell you, how you should live when married.
What's good for organized religion may NOT be in a married couple's personal interest.
For example, the catholic church is still against most forms of birth control , even for married couples. WTF!
b) Breaking marital traditions just to be different or obnoxious is dumb. For example, I thought that goofy choreographed dance , down the aisle video, was stupid and self serving to get attention. Blindly following tradition when it doesn't feel wrong is even worse then some goofy dance. For example, don't live beside parents or in-laws because "that's just what you do", could be marital disaster.
4. Having children - I never had kids and considered them to be a major source of work, money and stress . But that's me and many others feel blessed and rewarded by having children.
a. Too many people have kids by "accident". The man shoots his load into his girl , oops , and 9 months later a baby. That's careless and unfair to everyone involved. I used "withdrawal" to prevent unwanted pregnancy. I know what the naysayers think about withdrawal, but it's near impossible to get a girl pregnant IF you pull out 8-10 sec BEFORE ejaculation. Of course this assume the man can control his dick from shooting at will LOL. Being able to exhibit some basic dick control will make any man a much better lover.
b. Many couples get even closer when they PLAN the pregnancy and birth, etc. If a woman is with a man that isn't into being a dad, find another one to impregnate her or she should raise it on her own. If a woman tries to pressure or manipulate a man into getting her pregnant...RUN!
c. From what I've observed kids can be real marriage killers . The couple needs to work as a loving team to raise the kids. I've also heard it can be the both the most demanding and rewarding task anyone could take on. Having kids isn't a lukewarm deal, you will either love it or hate it for many years. Listen to your heart and if you have any doubts about having children...DON'T.
d. The terms "baby mama and baby daddy" make me cringe. This " whatever" attitude about pregnancy and parenting is dumb.
If you want kids, great, work together to raise the kids. If you don't want to be a parent, avoid getting a woman pregnant.
Humans are NOT animals,so use some self control and birth control.
5. Fidelity - If you want to screw around, don't get married. Just stay single or get divorced.
Don't give that , "it was an accident or mistake" crap when it comes to screwing around on your spouse.
An accident is slipping and falling. Unless you slipped and fell into her vavjaja, it was no mistake.
6. LIFE - My most cherished moments with my wife is when we just relax in bed watching some goofy show or movie , together.
Real life has many tedious times, for EVERYONE. Life and marriage isn't meant to be a amusement park. The key is to enjoy the basic stuff as much as the sex and fun times.
next up - SEX
Highlighted portion is a waste of time. May as well believe in ghosts and Dennis Wolf`s Calves.
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Background - I'm a 55 yr old former bodybuilding douchebag and been married 4x ( 3 divorces).
I'm currently happily married to wife #4
Seriously this is sadder than me giving advice on how to flirt with bitches at the club. using body language, facial expressions and tone of voice.
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Marriage
1.Partnership - Marriage is all about building a life with a loving PARTNER at your side. Both people need to work and have a stable career.
A man doesn't need to dominate and control his wife. He herds her along with gentle persuasion and by his own example.
BOTH people need to work and bring something to the table. It's the only way to be true partners and maintain mutual respect and dignity.
And married four times!? This is like getting a lecture from a bald barber. ::)
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I went to my 25 year high school reunion and practically every person who got married in their 20's is now divorced. Several have had 2 divorces already. The hot stuck-up chicks are now chubby and the scrawny nerds are now fit and muscular. Complete role reversal.
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not gonna read that wall of text. im not taking advice from someone who been married 4 times.
-
Background - I'm a 55 yr old former bodybuilding douchebag and been married 4x ( 3 divorces).
I'm currently happily married to wife #4 and learned some things the hard way LOL.
I teach physics at a moderate sized college and live in North Georgia.
Marriage
1.Partnership - Marriage is all about building a life with a loving PARTNER at your side. Both people need to work and have a stable career.
A man doesn't need to dominate and control his wife. He herds her along with gentle persuasion and by his own example.
BOTH people need to work and bring something to the table. It's the only way to be true partners and maintain mutual respect and dignity.
2. Age - Don't even think about getting married in your 20's.
a) age 35 is the minimum age anyone who doesn't really want kids to get married. 40 is even better, especially for men.
b) age 30 for a woman who wants to have kids with a mature man ( at least 30) who really wants to be a dad.
That's young enough to have a healthy , safe birth , BUT be mature enough to deal with the demands of parenthood.
3. Personal choice - Do NOT let religious doctrine or tradition rule your decisions when it comes to marriage.
a) I have a basic spiritual belief in GOD, but, I wouldn't let some Priest, Rabi or Pastor tell you, how you should live when married.
What's good for organized religion may NOT be in a married couple's personal interest.
For example, the catholic church is still against most forms of birth control , even for married couples. WTF!
b) Breaking marital traditions just to be different or obnoxious is dumb. For example, I thought that goofy choreographed dance , down the aisle video, was stupid and self serving to get attention. Blindly following tradition when it doesn't feel wrong is even worse then some goofy dance. For example, don't live beside parents or in-laws because "that's just what you do", could be marital disaster.
4. Having children - I never had kids and considered them to be a major source of work, money and stress . But that's me and many others feel blessed and rewarded by having children.
a. Too many people have kids by "accident". The man shoots his load into his girl , oops , and 9 months later a baby. That's careless and unfair to everyone involved. I used "withdrawal" to prevent unwanted pregnancy. I know what the naysayers think about withdrawal, but it's near impossible to get a girl pregnant IF you pull out 8-10 sec BEFORE ejaculation. Of course this assume the man can control his dick from shooting at will LOL. Being able to exhibit some basic dick control will make any man a much better lover.
b. Many couples get even closer when they PLAN the pregnancy and birth, etc. If a woman is with a man that isn't into being a dad, find another one to impregnate her or she should raise it on her own. If a woman tries to pressure or manipulate a man into getting her pregnant...RUN!
c. From what I've observed kids can be real marriage killers . The couple needs to work as a loving team to raise the kids. I've also heard it can be the both the most demanding and rewarding task anyone could take on. Having kids isn't a lukewarm deal, you will either love it or hate it for many years. Listen to your heart and if you have any doubts about having children...DON'T.
d. The terms "baby mama and baby daddy" make me cringe. This " whatever" attitude about pregnancy and parenting is dumb.
If you want kids, great, work together to raise the kids. If you don't want to be a parent, avoid getting a woman pregnant.
Humans are NOT animals,so use some self control and birth control.
5. Fidelity - If you want to screw around, don't get married. Just stay single or get divorced.
Don't give that , "it was an accident or mistake" crap when it comes to screwing around on your spouse.
An accident is slipping and falling. Unless you slipped and fell into her vavjaja, it was no mistake.
6. LIFE - My most cherished moments with my wife is when we just relax in bed watching some goofy show or movie , together.
Real life has many tedious times, for EVERYONE. Life and marriage isn't meant to be a amusement park. The key is to enjoy the basic stuff as much as the sex and fun times.
next up - SEX
Are you related to Elizabeth taylor in any way,,she had luck too in the marriage dept..
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I am going to have to redline all of Section IV, all subparts. Your views on parenting are not relevant after disclosure of your no-kids status.
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What about Grape-fruiting and white toweling? any successful marriage can't possible exist without them ;D
Howard, how many of your ex-wives are you paying alimony to? Also, how much has each marriage cost you? seriously, each wife must have taken a chunk of assets with her.
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I went to my 25 year high school reunion and practically every person who got married in their 20's is now divorced. Several have had 2 divorces already. The hot stuck-up chicks are now chubby and the scrawny nerds are now fit and muscular. Complete role reversal.
I got married 3x before this one . Bottom line is PEOPLE CHANGE!
You won't be the same person at 40, that you were at 20.
Woman tend to change even more then men between 20 -35.
I was mistaken to get married in my younger years and they all failed.
In brief, the first two wives aid they didn't want kids when we got married .
They CHANGED a few years into marriage and wanted kids and I never did.
No way to compromise on that so we got divorced.
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Whatever Howard says, do the opposite. Dude's been married four times...LOL
Just kidding, Howard...but really, guys, don't do as Howard does. :)
It takes some guys longer to get to the winner's circle.
Jay got 2nd for several years before he finally took home the Olympia prize.
I learned the hard way about pitfalls and disasters when it comes to marriage...the hard way.
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I got married 3x before this one . Bottom line is PEOPLE CHANGE!
You won't be the same person at 40, that you were at 20.
Woman tend to change even more then men between 20 -35.
I was mistaken to get married in my younger years and they all failed.
In brief, the first two wives aid they didn't want kids when we got married .
They CHANGED a few years into marriage and wanted kids and I never did.
No way to compromise on that so we got divorced.
Give me a break so because your marriage failed in your 20s nobody should get married in their 20s, are you aware that a lot of people are different from whatever you where in your 20s.
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I got married 3x before this one . Bottom line is PEOPLE CHANGE!
You won't be the same person at 40, that you were at 20.
Woman tend to change even more then men between 20 -35.
I was mistaken to get married in my younger years and they all failed.
In brief, the first two wives aid they didn't want kids when we got married .
They CHANGED a few years into marriage and wanted kids and I never did.
No way to compromise on that so we got divorced.
Good read, thank you Howard.
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I got married 3x before this one . Bottom line is PEOPLE CHANGE!
You won't be the same person at 40, that you were at 20.
Woman tend to change even more then men between 20 -35.
So do you advice men to get a new wife every decade of their adult life? ;D
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any tips for a 55 year old highly educated self employed divorced man with basically no social life on where to meet decent women?
dating sites seem to attract scambag gold diggers with nothing to offer
too old for clubbing
this is really a big issue
i cant find an answer to it
any idea howard?
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Give me a break so because your marriage failed in your 20s nobody should get married in their 20s, are you aware that a lot of people are different from whatever you where in your 20s.
Well, I wouldn't make a law to ban anyone from being married in their 20's.
I'm just giving my 2 cents worth of information based only on MY own life experience.
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not gonna read that wall of text. im not taking advice from someone who been married 4 times.
I know many will disagree, but staying in an unhappy , loveless marriage is dumb.
There is NOTHING honorable about doing that. It's just being stubborn and refusing to move on and accept reality.
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It takes some guys longer to get to the winner's circle.
Jay got 2nd for several years before he finally took home the Olympia prize.
I learned the hard way about pitfalls and disasters when it comes to marriage...the hard way.
You see the difference is, cutler didn't start off playing basketball, switching to baseball failing moving on to college football, and then deciding on bodybuilding.
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Your views on parenting are not relevant after disclosure of your no-kids status.
Boom. This.
It's amusing to read the comments based on a few friends' experiences though. Common theme here.
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I got married 3x before this one . Bottom line is PEOPLE CHANGE!
You won't be the same person at 40, that you were at 20.
Woman tend to change even more then men between 20 -35.
I was mistaken to get married in my younger years and they all failed.
In brief, the first two wives aid they didn't want kids when we got married .
They CHANGED a few years into marriage and wanted kids and I never did.
No way to compromise on that so we got divorced.
Following this Zen-like wisdom - you will most certainly not be the same at 65 as you are now so then you will work on number 5??????
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Allow me to expound on the divorce part.
Once you sign that marriage certificate (i.e. a legally binding contract), she owns 50% of you from that point on. You might as well cut off one of your testicles and give it to her because she owns it.
DIVORCE will kill a man. You are going to be financially ass-raped by her and her lawyer. Men are so stupid to believe that: "my girl would never do that to me"... oh yes she can, and probably will... whenever she wants to... no matter what the reason is.
DO NOT GET MARRIED... EVER. That goes for gay men as well.
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any tips for a 55 year old highly educated self employed divorced man with basically no social life on where to meet decent women?
dating sites seem to attract scambag gold diggers with nothing to offer
too old for clubbing
this is really a big issue
i cant find an answer to it
any idea howard?
Join a good church that's involved with the community. Get involved with their volunteer, charitable, community work. The single women you meet there doing volunteer charity work, are a lot less likely to be gold diggers and more likely to make selfless, goodhearted, loving wives.
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Join a good church that's involved with the community. Get involved with their volunteer, charitable, community work. The single women you meet there doing volunteer charity work, are a lot less likely to be gold diggers and more likely to make selfless, goodhearted, loving wives.
no church activity in these parts except foreign culture churches or a handful diehard nutcases
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no church activity in these parts except foreign culture churches or a handful diehard nutcases
Are you Canadian? That's whacha get for driving out the Christians and bringing in Muslems...LOL...I kid, I kid. ;D
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srsly it's tough out there for a guy close to 60 looking for a new partner that isnt fucked up from past experiences or plain gold digger
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One of the best pieces of financial advice ever given: "Marry a frugal woman, once, and stay married."
It's too late for you, Howard, but I wish you and your wife best of luck and may you stay happily married to her for the rest of your life.
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I think human consciousness is a tragic misstep in evolution. We became too self-aware. Nature created an aspect of nature separate from itself. We are creatures that should not exist by natural law. We are things that labor under the illusion of having a self, that accretion of sensory experience and feelings, programmed with total assurance that we are each somebody, when in fact everybody's nobody. I think the honorable thing for our species to do is to deny our programming. Stop reproducing. Walk hand in hand into extinction. One last midnight, brothers and sisters opting out of a raw deal.
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I think human consciousness is a tragic misstep in evolution. We became too self-aware. Nature created an aspect of nature separate from itself. We are creatures that should not exist by natural law. We are things that labor under the illusion of having a self, that accretion of sensory experience and feelings, programmed with total assurance that we are each somebody, when in fact everybody's nobody. I think the honorable thing for our species to do is to deny our programming. Stop reproducing. Walk hand in hand into extinction. One last midnight, brothers and sisters opting out of a raw deal.
we should just realize we are nothing more than a product of evolution and not expect life to be a smooth ride but a struggle
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I think human consciousness is a tragic misstep in evolution. We became too self-aware. Nature created an aspect of nature separate from itself. We are creatures that should not exist by natural law. We are things that labor under the illusion of having a self, that accretion of sensory experience and feelings, programmed with total assurance that we are each somebody, when in fact everybody's nobody. I think the honorable thing for our species to do is to deny our programming. Stop reproducing. Walk hand in hand into extinction. One last midnight, brothers and sisters opting out of a raw deal.
This thread is not about reproducing. Howard has been married four times, yet he neither wants nor has any kids.
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My lust for women has died off almost completely.. :-\
Am I in male menopause now at thirty?
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http://qz.com/254477/its-time-to-accept-this-fact-a-really-great-marriage-is-rare/
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http://qz.com/254477/its-time-to-accept-this-fact-a-really-great-marriage-is-rare/
Good read, good read!
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I think human consciousness is a tragic misstep in evolution. We became too self-aware. Nature created an aspect of nature separate from itself. We are creatures that should not exist by natural law. We are things that labor under the illusion of having a self, that accretion of sensory experience and feelings, programmed with total assurance that we are each somebody, when in fact everybody's nobody. I think the honorable thing for our species to do is to deny our programming. Stop reproducing. Walk hand in hand into extinction. One last midnight, brothers and sisters opting out of a raw deal.
meh not words of a great mind.
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Howard giving marriage advice is like...
JK Howard... There's some good advice in alot of what you wrote.
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I am going to have to redline all of Section IV, all subparts. Your views on parenting are not relevant after disclosure of your no-kids status.
I'd NEVER try to tell someone how to raise kids .
I'm simply pointing out the pros/cons of having children.
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Whatever Howard says, do the opposite. Dude's been married four times...LOL
Just kidding, Howard...but really, guys, don't do as Howard does. :)
Seriously...........End of thread.
Howard has made a joke out of marriage. If he really had any assests, his first three wives would have bled him dry.
Maybe Howard isn't telling the whole story.
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What about Grape-fruiting and white toweling? any successful marriage can't possible exist without them ;D
Howard, how many of your ex-wives are you paying alimony to? Also, how much has each marriage cost you? seriously, each wife must have taken a chunk of assets with her.
We each went our separate ways with nobody owing anything.
My current wife is a VP for a major bank and I sold my place and moved in with her.
Of course, I never had kids , so that makes it easier when you divorce
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any tips for a 55 year old highly educated self employed divorced man with basically no social life on where to meet decent women?
dating sites seem to attract scambag gold diggers with nothing to offer
too old for clubbing
this is really a big issue
i cant find an answer to it
any idea howard?
http://www.match.com
I'm 100% serious and met my current wife on there a few yrs ago
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This thread is not about reproducing. Howard has been married four times, yet he neither wants nor has any kids.
True dat.
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My lust for women has died off almost completely.. :-\
Am I in male menopause now at thirty?
Knowing who you really are is half the battle.
Now come out, all the way and act on it ;D
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Howard giving marriage advice is like...
JK Howard... There's some good advice in alot of what you wrote.
Had Matt Foley listened to me he might not be piss broke paying child support and living in
A VAN BY THE RIVER
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Highlighted portion is a waste of time. May as well believe in ghosts and Dennis Wolf`s Calves.
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Join a good church that's involved with the community. Get involved with their volunteer, charitable, community work. The single women you meet there doing volunteer charity work, are a lot less likely to be gold diggers and more likely to make selfless, goodhearted, loving wives.
Unless you share a similar religious faith, I don't think a "church going" woman would be interested in dating.
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Seriously...........End of thread.
Howard has made a joke out of marriage. If he really had any assests, his first three wives would have bled him dry.
Maybe Howard isn't telling the whole story.
I never had a bad divorce where I got "bled dry".
My wives all had good careers .
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My lust for women has died off almost completely.. :-\
Am I in male menopause now at thirty?
Too many oily shredded glutes made you gay.
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The whole general-belief-in-god thing is so ridiculous.
It seems only those who have lost all this brainwashing horseshit can truly see the utter nonsense in such a thing.
As the years pass further from the point when I began to emerge from my own brainwashed younger years, I see the concept of "god", etc. as being just beyond idiotic and juvenile.
And it's not that I DON'T think there is possibility to the idea that we were created by something. However, even if this is true, why do we have to label this other entity a god? We create things and we don't refer to ourselves as gods. Just because what we've created isn't as sophisticated as, well, us, doesn't mean anything. We're simply not yet at that level of intelligent evolution.
It pains me that this species is so damn pathetic and juvenile.
P.S. I don't want to get married and certainly don't want children. To bring someone whom I love into this violent and goofy world to suffer all its indignities and stresses and pain is PURE CRUELTY.
When I'm gone, good riddance. This place sucks ass.
Of course, I do LOVE my music.
Heavy metal!
Fuck the world ~ Hail and Kill!
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The whole general-belief-in-god thing is so ridiculous.
It seems only those who have lost all this brainwashing horseshit can truly see the utter nonsense in such a thing.
As the years pass further from the point when I began to emerge from my own brainwashing younger years, I see the concept of "god", etc. as being just beyond idiotic and juvenile.
And it's not that I DON'T think there is possibility to the idea that we were created by something. However, even if this is true, why do we have to label this other entity a god? We create things and we don't refer to ourselves as gods. Just because what we've created isn't as sophisticated as, well, us, doesn't mean anything. We're simply not yet at that level of intelligent evolution.
It pains me that this species is so damn pathetic and juvenile.
P.S. I don't want to get married and certainly don't want children. To bring someone whom I love into this violent and goofy world to suffer all its indignities and stresses and pain is PURE CRUELTY.
When I'm gone, good riddance. This place sucks ass.
Of course, I do LOVE my music.
Heavy metal!
Fuck the world ~ Hail and Kill!
Satanist of peace.
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Oh, I wanted to add that I think a couple should date for a year and then live together for a year before they get married.
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http://www.match.com
I'm 100% serious and met my current wife on there a few yrs ago
What was your opening line?
Assume you had a topless selfie on there, to seal the deal.
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Maybe someone could get Titus a smartphone and have him make a thread on how to treat women too.
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Background - I'm a 55 yr old former bodybuilding douchebag and been married 4x ( 3 divorces).
I'm currently happily married to wife #4 and learned some things the hard way LOL.
I teach physics and live in North Georgia.
Marriage
1.Partnership - Marriage is all about building a life with a loving PARTNER at your side. Both people need to work and have a stable career.
A man doesn't need to dominate and control his wife. He herds her along with gentle persuasion and by his own example.
BOTH people need to work and bring something to the table. It's the only way to be true partners and maintain mutual respect and dignity.
2. Age - Don't even think about getting married in your 20's.
a) age 35 is the minimum age anyone who doesn't really want kids to get married. 40 is even better, especially for men.
b) age 30 for a woman who wants to have kids with a mature man ( at least 30) who really wants to be a dad.
That's young enough to have a healthy , safe birth , BUT be mature enough to deal with the demands of parenthood.
3. Personal choice - Do NOT let religious doctrine or tradition rule your decisions when it comes to marriage.
a) I have a basic spiritual belief in GOD, but, I wouldn't let some Priest, Rabi or Pastor tell you, how you should live when married.
What's good for organized religion may NOT be in a married couple's personal interest.
For example, the catholic church is still against most forms of birth control , even for married couples. WTF!
b) Breaking marital traditions just to be different or obnoxious is dumb. For example, I thought that goofy choreographed dance , down the aisle video, was stupid and self serving to get attention. Blindly following tradition when it doesn't feel right is even worse then some goofy dance. For example, don't live beside parents or in-laws because "that's just what you do", could be marital disaster.
4. Having children - I never had kids and considered them to be a major source of work, money and stress . But that's me and many others feel blessed and rewarded by having children.
a. Too many people have kids by "accident". The man shoots his load into his girl , oops , and 9 months later a baby. That's careless and unfair to everyone involved. I used "withdrawal" to prevent unwanted pregnancy. I know what the naysayers think about withdrawal, but it's near impossible to get a girl pregnant IF you pull out 8-10 sec BEFORE ejaculation. Of course this assume the man can control his dick from shooting at will LOL. Being able to exhibit some basic dick control will make any man a much better lover.
b. Many couples get even closer when they PLAN the pregnancy and birth, etc. If a woman is with a man that isn't into being a dad, find another one to impregnate her or she should raise it on her own. If a woman tries to pressure or manipulate a man into getting her pregnant...RUN!
c. From what I've observed kids can be real marriage killers . The couple needs to work as a loving team to raise the kids. I've also heard it can be the both the most demanding and rewarding task anyone could take on. Having kids isn't a lukewarm deal, you will either love it or hate it for many years. Listen to your heart and if you have any doubts about having children...DON'T.
d. The terms "baby mama and baby daddy" make me cringe. This " whatever" attitude about pregnancy and parenting is dumb.
If you want kids, great, work together to raise the kids. If you don't want to be a parent, avoid getting a woman pregnant.
Humans are NOT animals,so use some self control and birth control.
5. Fidelity - If you want to screw around, don
't get married. Just stay single or get divorced.
Don't give that , "it was an accident or mistake" crap when it comes to screwing around on your spouse.
An accident is slipping and falling. Unless you slipped and fell into her vavjaja, it was no mistake.
6. LIFE - My most cherished moments with my wife is when we just relax in bed watching some goofy show or movie , together.
Real life has many tedious times, for EVERYONE. Life and marriage isn't meant to be a amusement park. The key is to enjoy the basic stuff as much as the sex and fun times.
next up - SEX
Your advice is biased based on your personal experience. My children, their spouses, my wife and I all married very young. 50, 26 & 20 years later respectively, we are all still happily married. This is my experience.
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Your advice is biased based on your personal experience. My children, their spouses, my wife and I all married very young. 50, 26 & 20 years later respectively, we are all still happily married. This is my experience.
Wait for it.......
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Your advice is biased based on your personal experience. My children, their spouses, my wife and I all married very young. 50, 26 & 20 years later respectively, we are all still happily married. This is my experience.
pretty amazing
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Your advice is biased based on your personal experience. My children, their spouses, my wife and I all married very young. 50, 26 & 20 years later respectively, we are all still happily married. This is my experience.
(http://gifwall.net/gif/gw-close20door.gif)
You are an old fart who's fucked one woman all life. It's understandable your "experience" must be positive (even if negative) as you'd go insane otherwise, after realising you've missed so much wet pussies.
Giving advice on relathionships after being 100 years with one person is like giving advices on cars after driving one Toyota camry for 40 years ::)
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(http://gifwall.net/gif/gw-close20door.gif)
You are an old fart who's fucked one woman all life. It's understandable your "experience" must be positive (even if negative) as you'd go insane otherwise, after realising you've missed so much wet pussies.
Giving advice on relathionships after being 100 years with one person is like giving advices on cars after driving one Toyota camry for 40 years ::)
I just wanted to see the gif pal.
No need for the juvenile insults.
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I just wanted to see the gif pal.
No need for the juvenile insults.
Lol..
These who say that Howard is a wrong person to take advice on a marriage - that's completely wrong. Dude obviously is IN LOVE with marriage itself - he's marrying, and marrying, and marrying, like a mad man and there's no force to stop him from another marriage if this one would fail once again. Do you know many people who have such a strong belief in marriage??
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Lol..
These who say that Howard is a wrong person to take advice on a marriage - that's completely wrong. Dude obviously is IN LOVE with marriage itself - he's marrying, and marrying, and marrying, like a mad man and there's no force to stop him from another marriage if this one would fail once again. Do you know many people who have such a strong belief in marriage??
He is failing like a madman. Marriage is for life. Till death do us part. If your marriage fails you have no business finding another partner.
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(http://gifwall.net/gif/gw-close20door.gif)
You are an old fart who's fucked one woman all life. It's understandable your "experience" must be positive (even if negative) as you'd go insane otherwise, after realising you've missed so much wet pussies.
Giving advice on relathionships after being 100 years with one person is like giving advices on cars after driving one Toyota camry for 40 years ::)
For fuck's sake. Relationships can hardly be equated to cars. The beauty of a marriage relationship is in its perdurability.
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any tips for a 55 year old highly educated self employed divorced man with basically no social life on where to meet decent women?
dating sites seem to attract scambag gold diggers with nothing to offer
too old for clubbing
this is really a big issue
i cant find an answer to it
any idea howard?
Try sugar daddy website senor Leopold :)
Chesterfield decorated & cohiba puffers clubs for older gents actually have the best looking ladies ........
Club de Madrid is 1 for the best social connections ( ;)), U should join this $$$ club ;D
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My lust for women has died off almost completely.. :-\
Am I in male menopause now at thirty?
No worries - now is the time to shine.
Leather slippers, reading newspapers, feeding birds - the whole nine yards.
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He is failing like a madman. Marriage is for life. Till death do us part. If your marriage fails you have no business finding another partner.
Quitters never win.
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Quitters never win.
Exactly. That is why divorce is anathema to the noble gentleman.
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Exactly. That is why divorce is anathema to the noble gentleman.
As you can witness - dude is in a happy marriage. These who said it must be "for life", well.. let's say that humans are known for wishful thinking. ::)
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(http://gifwall.net/gif/gw-close20door.gif)
You are an old fart who's fucked one woman all life. It's understandable your "experience" must be positive (even if negative) as you'd go insane otherwise, after realising you've missed so much wet pussies.
Giving advice on relathionships after being 100 years with one person is like giving advices on cars after driving one Toyota camry for 40 years ::)
Were in my post did I offer advice?
Relationships are more involved than just sex.
If my choices drove me insane, I am not aware of it. All is good.
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My advice to others is to do what feels right to you in your heart and mind. What I have witnessed over my lifetime is that sometimes relationships are successful in the long term and other times they are not.
Most of my friends and some of my extended family have been or are currently divorced. My mom and dad separated when I was 4 years old. My mom and stepdad stayed together for over 30 years until my step dad died. Their relationship was tumultuous and seemingly extremely disfunctional.
What i have learned about relationships from my and other's experiences is that it is not easy to figure out what makes a relationship work or not. Therefore any advice offered should be taken lightly.
Howard is looking at a narrow window of relationship experience. Without doubt, he honestly believes in the advice he offered which was to wait until you are more mature before marrying. I wish him success in his present relationship.
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My advice to others is to do what feels right to you in your heart and mind. What I have witnessed over my lifetime is that sometimes relationships are successful in the long term and other times they are not.
Most of my friends and some of my extended family have been or are currently divorced. My mom and dad separated when I was 4 years old. My mom and stepdad stayed together for over 30 years until my step dad died. Their relationship was tumultuous and seemingly extremely disfunctional.
What i have learned about relationships from my and other's experiences is that it is not easy to figure out what makes a relationship work or not. Therefore any advice offered should be taken lightly.
Howard is looking at a narrow window of relationship experience. Without doubt, he honestly believes in the advice he offered which was to wait until you are more mature before marrying. I wish him success in his present relationship.
I agree with you Prime. Everyone is different and one must do what's right for them.
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I agree with you Prime. Everyone is different and one must do what's right for them oneself.
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(http://i58.tinypic.com/2zdpptz.jpg)
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You're giving marriage and relationship advice? It's like taking mental health advice from a schizophrenic homeless man living in a cardboard box. Yes, you're preaching is advice by standing on a soap box espousing your rhetoric on how one should be in a relationship with a woman. We heard the same kind of nonsense with your other wife.
I do wish you well. I hope this is the last time and wish you nothing but the best. I hope she knows what she got herself into.
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Your advice is biased based on your personal experience. My children, their spouses, my wife and I all married very young. 50, 26 & 20 years later respectively, we are all still happily married. This is my experience.
C'mon now, this is a forum and my advice is going to be based on my life experience.
I have no doubt you and many others have had different experiences and will have a different opinion.
FYI, my own maternal grandparents were married for 74 yrs. They seemed happy.
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Lol..
These who say that Howard is a wrong person to take advice on a marriage - that's completely wrong. Dude obviously is IN LOVE with marriage itself - he's marrying, and marrying, and marrying, like a mad man and there's no force to stop him from another marriage if this one would fail once again. Do you know many people who have such a strong belief in marriage??
Thanks, but I don't dismiss other's opinions and experiences that differ from mine on this issue.
My main issue is to do things on your own terms.
Too many people end up getting married, and having kids, because " it's just what you do."
I suspect ,too many people end of living lives of quiet desperation.
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The whole general-belief-in-god thing is so ridiculous.
It seems only those who have lost all this brainwashing horseshit can truly see the utter nonsense in such a thing.
As the years pass further from the point when I began to emerge from my own brainwashed younger years, I see the concept of "god", etc. as being just beyond idiotic and juvenile.
And it's not that I DON'T think there is possibility to the idea that we were created by something. However, even if this is true, why do we have to label this other entity a god? We create things and we don't refer to ourselves as gods. Just because what we've created isn't as sophisticated as, well, us, doesn't mean anything. We're simply not yet at that level of intelligent evolution.
It pains me that this species is so damn pathetic and juvenile.
P.S. I don't want to get married and certainly don't want children. To bring someone whom I love into this violent and goofy world to suffer all its indignities and stresses and pain is PURE CRUELTY.
When I'm gone, good riddance. This place sucks ass.
Of course, I do LOVE my music.
Heavy metal!
Fuck the world ~ Hail and Kill!
Your kids may just contribute to making this world better. Imagine if your parents thought the same. All the contribution that you have made to the bodybuilding world, Musclemag, strength world, would have never existed.
This world is violent, yes. As it has ALWAYS been. People today think that they and times that they live in are so special, when in the grand scheme of things, the opposite is true.
We've become a bitter, cynical people. And in general, bitter cynical people don't want to propagate, nor cannot stand one another.
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I am going to have to redline all of Section IV, all subparts. Your views on parenting are not relevant after disclosure of your no-kids status.
People that don't kids have crack me up when they tell you what it's like having kids
It's like me speaking on what's it's like to be a black man in America ::)
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People that don't kids have crack me up when they tell you what it's like having kids
It's like me speaking on what's it's like to be a black man in America ::)
Yeah, my sister used to be all full of parental advice for me before she had kids of her own. She and her husband have two now with another on the way and she has completely STFU with parental advice now. :D
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Your kids may just contribute to making this world better. Imagine if your parents thought the same. All the contribution that you have made to the bodybuilding world, Musclemag, strength world, would have never existed.
This world is violent, yes. As it has ALWAYS been. People today think that they and times that they live in are so special, when in the grand scheme of things, the opposite is true.
We've become a bitter, cynical people. And in general, bitter cynical people don't want to propagate, nor cannot stand one another.
Fortress is an intelligent guy, but he never made it past 18,emotionally.
Fuck the world, hail kill.
What the fuck does that even mean. Who am I hailing who am I supposed to be "killing"
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People that don't kids have crack me up when they tell you what it's like having kids
It's like me speaking on what's it's like to be a black man in America ::)
I can only go by my own observations and what others tell me who have kids.
You are right, I don't what it's like to have kids , but it looked stressful to me.
Ya know, I've never been screwed up the ass in prison, but I know I don't want that LOL
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My advice to others is to do what feels right to you in your heart and mind. What I have witnessed over my lifetime is that sometimes relationships are successful in the long term and other times they are not.
Most of my friends and some of my extended family have been or are currently divorced. My mom and dad separated when I was 4 years old. My mom and stepdad stayed together for over 30 years until my step dad died. Their relationship was tumultuous and seemingly extremely disfunctional.
What i have learned about relationships from my and other's experiences is that it is not easy to figure out what makes a relationship work or not. Therefore any advice offered should be taken lightly.
Howard is looking at a narrow window of relationship experience. Without doubt, he honestly believes in the advice he offered which was to wait until you are more mature before marrying. I wish him success in his present relationship.
Good post. Thanks for adding another thoughtful viewpoint to the thread topic.
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As you can witness - dude is in a happy marriage. These who said it must be "for life", well.. let's say that humans are known for wishful thinking. ::)
I'll never understand the logic behind blindly obeying the "death till your part" edict.
I think that harkens back to old religious values and tradition.
I honestly don't think it applies in the 21st century.
Why should anyone stay for life, in a loveless, dysfunctional, unhappy marriage?
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You're giving marriage and relationship advice? It's like taking mental health advice from a schizophrenic homeless man living in a cardboard box. Yes, you're preaching is advice by standing on a soap box espousing your rhetoric on how one should be in a relationship with a woman. We heard the same kind of nonsense with your other wife.
I do wish you well. I hope this is the last time and wish you nothing but the best. I hope she knows what she got herself into.
LOL :D
I was asked by another poster to start a thread outlining my views on marriage and relationships.
I didn't have anything better to do and it was fun to see my thoughts get organized in text.
Thanks for the kind words about my current marriage and I'm doing my best .
FYI, my views here posted on getbig are just my OPINION , based on my own unique life experience.
I think it's obvious, plenty don't or won't agree with me.
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Some good advice from Howard based on his life experiences. Prime and Booty also. I think the most important thing regarding relationships and especially marriage is to know who you are. Once you know that you have a good shot of being in a long term relationship.
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C'mon now, this is a forum and my advice is going to be based on my life experience.
I have no doubt you and many others have had different experiences and will have a different opinion.
FYI, my own maternal grandparents were married for 74 yrs. They seemed happy.
I'm nitpicking, but sometimes it is wiser to simply relay your experience without offering any advice. Your track record when it comes to successful marriages isn't to hot....just saying. So even though you've had ample experience with marriage, it has mostly been negative.
The above being said, I sincerely wish you every success in your current marriage. It is time for you to have a positive relationship experience.
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haha!!
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Not only advice on marriage from someone that's failed 3 times - but advice on having kids from someone that's never had them.
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Not only advice on marriage from someone that's failed 3 times - but advice on having kids from someone that's never had them.
I used outline form to post my thoughts. I'm not trying to be a counselor or give marital advice here.
I'm simply trying to show an alternative way to look at marriage and relationships.
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I'm nitpicking, but sometimes it is wiser to simply relay your experience without offering any advice. Your track record when it comes to successful marriages isn't to hot....just saying. So even though you've had ample experience with marriage, it has mostly been negative.
The above being said, I sincerely wish you every success in your current marriage. It is time for you to have a positive relationship experience.
I don't think marriage is always meant to be a lifetime deal.
I view marriage as a loving partnership, NOT some lifetime contract, signed by GOD.
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I don't think marriage is always meant to be a lifetime deal.
I view marriage as a loving partnership, NOT some lifetime contract, signed by GOD.
I am not a religious person. God has nothing to do with my views on marriage. Marriage is a loving partnership, just as you suggest. A few of us get lucky the first time around. It is fairly certain I will remain married to my one and only wife until one of us dies.
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Fuck the world, hail kill.
What the fuck does that even mean. Who am I hailing who am I supposed to be "killing"
It is a Satanic anthem of sorts. The aim naturally is to destroy everything good.
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Married Getbigger getting blown up...
without a bomb.
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http://qz.com/254477/its-time-to-accept-this-fact-a-really-great-marriage-is-rare/
Great read and I'm glad that me and the girlfriend don't adhere to much of what's said in that article. As a primary school teacher she earns what I spend on beer every month, and I don't really drink at all. With the business and my full time job I earn enough by a country mile that she never have to think about work again if that's what she wanted. But because it's just me and her there's little point for her to sit at home. She enjoys her job too much. But with my crazy work habits and coming home fucked every night, she takes care of all the chores. I help where I can but it's all her. In return when she goes shopping with her sister or friends I'll give her my debit card (access to the Roman Empire as I call it) and tell her to go wild. She rarely spends more than a few 100 bucks as she feels too bad to spend my money (our money as she calls it). I might take that time that she's away to tidy up around the house and surprise her that way. So it does balance out. I also 'surprise' her with coffee in bed every morning, feed the cats, do any dishes from the night before, as I'm pretty much up never later than 4am. Little things and women love that type of shit.
I think it's also very important to give each other plenty of space. This weekend she's at a baby shower and then having a girls night whilst I'm meeting up with my bros for some top shelf stuff. Tomorrow (Sunday) we'll do something together.
And I might have some whores come down on me for saying this, but I don't think a relationship should be 100% equal. Or 50-50, whichever way you see it. I do however think the illusion of it being equal is quite important, but either one of the slightly more responsible/mature/intelligent party should gently steer the other one towards an agreed upon goal. As long as you never ever abuse that responsibility. And if you earn more than her, never make her ask you for money or blatantly seem like you hold all the good cards (because you do), it breeds resentment. Offer to buy them gifts all the time, if she's a keeper, she won't accept them. Just yesterday I offered her diamond ear rings, a business class ticket to Australia to see her friend next weekend and a fancy handbag. She told me to save 'our' money instead. When I gave her my bank card when she went shopping with her sister, she made a point of it to only buy specials and bring me the receipts, unprompted.
You can train them anyway you like, just be stealthy about it and never abuse that fact.
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The whole general-belief-in-god thing is so ridiculous.
It seems only those who have lost all this brainwashing horseshit can truly see the utter nonsense in such a thing.
As the years pass further from the point when I began to emerge from my own brainwashed younger years, I see the concept of "god", etc. as being just beyond idiotic and juvenile.
And it's not that I DON'T think there is possibility to the idea that we were created by something. However, even if this is true, why do we have to label this other entity a god? We create things and we don't refer to ourselves as gods. Just because what we've created isn't as sophisticated as, well, us, doesn't mean anything. We're simply not yet at that level of intelligent evolution.
It pains me that this species is so damn pathetic and juvenile.
P.S. I don't want to get married and certainly don't want children. To bring someone whom I love into this violent and goofy world to suffer all its indignities and stresses and pain is PURE CRUELTY.
When I'm gone, good riddance. This place sucks ass.
Of course, I do LOVE my music.
Heavy metal!
Fuck the world ~ Hail and Kill!
You're a very cool poster and smart guy, but I don't understand why you always seem so negative about life. It's not THAT bad man. Sometimes you sound like a suicidal teenager. You don't have to interact with a brainless society at all if you don't want to. You can spend and focus your life with all that you deem beautiful and precious. Money is THE most important thing to a happy life. Don't let morons tell you otherwise. With money you can shield yourself and your family of halfwits and having to live between scum. Around my house we don't read any popular news media, NEVER watch any TV, don't spend all our time sitting online with imaginary 'friends' or do any stupid shit everyone suddenly deem 'normal'.
Forget the bad and classless tossers. Try and focus on the beautiful.
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Great read and I'm glad that me and the girlfriend don't adhere to much of what's said in that article. As a primary school teacher she earns what I spend on beer every month, and I don't really drink at all. With the business and my full time job I earn enough by a country mile that she never have to think about work again if that's what she wanted. But because it's just me and her there's little point for her to sit at home. She enjoys her job too much. But with my crazy work habits and coming home fucked every night, she takes care of all the chores. I help where I can but it's all her. In return when she goes shopping with her sister or friends I'll give her my debit card (access to the Roman Empire as I call it) and tell her to go wild. She rarely spends more than a few 100 bucks as she feels too bad to spend my money (our money as she calls it). I might take that time that she's away to tidy up around the house and surprise her that way. So it does balance out. I also 'surprise' her with coffee in bed every morning, feed the cats, do any dishes from the night before, as I'm pretty much up never later than 4am. Little things and women love that type of shit.
I think it's also very important to give each other plenty of space. This weekend she's at a baby shower and then having a girls night whilst I'm meeting up with my bros for some top shelf stuff. Tomorrow (Sunday) we'll do something together.
And I might have some whores come down on me for saying this, but I don't think a relationship should be 100% equal. Or 50-50, whichever way you see it. I do however think the illusion of it being equal is quite important, but either one of the slightly more responsible/mature/intelligent party should gently steer the other one towards an agreed upon goal. As long as you never ever abuse that responsibility. And if you earn more than her, never make her ask you for money or blatantly seem like you hold all the good cards (because you do), it breeds resentment. Offer to buy them gifts all the time, if she's a keeper, she won't accept them. Just yesterday I offered her diamond ear rings, a business class ticket to Australia to see her friend next weekend and a fancy handbag. She told me to save 'our' money instead. When I gave her my bank card when she went shopping with her sister, she made a point of it to only buy specials and bring me the receipts, unprompted.
You can train them anyway you like, just be stealthy about it and never abuse that fact.
Good post and it sounds like you have a relationship that works for you both.
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Good post and it sounds like you have a relationship that works for you both.
It does. That's because we don't listen to 'experts' on how relationships should be. 90% of people survive on wishful thinking in an ideal world/situation/how it is in books or movies.. We live with how they naturally evolve to be and in reality. Relationships in REALITY isn't a daily dose of meeting for organic lattes in quirky Italians shops whilst planning our holiday clearing up land mines in Sierra Leone, kissing in rain, hiring a quartet to play her songs you wrote her, flying off to romantic destinations filled with smiling people with perfect lives. People expect this bullshit and when reality hits them like a meteor they want out because 'Life' taught them to expect only the best. 'The Best' will spontaneously and magically fall into their laps without them having to put any effort in to gain that. They can't commit because they don't know what Life really is. They've never been taught or had the intelligence to see through all the fake-ness that people put out there. You see it on this forum in all its glory more than you see it on that people media, things, whatever the cool kids call it these days. I never bother to keep up or remember it past 2 seconds.
We just seem to gravitate more easily towards historical gender roles and we're both fine with it. And to the obvious envy of friends. 'You guys always seem to have it made'. All the while they struggle for control in their bullshit relationships.
We're a team and help each other. I don't waste my time shopping (I'd rather hack my own testicles off) nor does she waste hers chopping trees down or fighting office wars. It works. We both do what we're good at and whilst it we're not perfect people, we're perfect for each other.
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Your kids may just contribute to making this world better. Imagine if your parents thought the same. All the contribution that you have made to the bodybuilding world, Musclemag, strength world, would have never existed.
This world is violent, yes. As it has ALWAYS been. People today think that they and times that they live in are so special, when in the grand scheme of things, the opposite is true.
We've become a bitter, cynical people. And in general, bitter cynical people don't want to propagate, nor cannot stand one another.
I'd prefer noone to have kids as they are rivals to me and my relatives. I don't care about any of their possible "contributions", noone cares, it makes no sense. We only care about ourselves and these who are close to us. Period.
Bunch of ants reproducing blindly, nothing more.
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I am not a religious person. God has nothing to do with my views on marriage. Marriage is a loving partnership, just as you suggest. A few of us get lucky the first time around. It is fairly certain I will remain married to my one and only wife until one of us dies.
I would not be surprised that you didn't even have much options so what else is left...
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It does. That's because we don't listen to 'experts' on how relationships should be. 90% of people survive on wishful thinking in an ideal world/situation/how it is in books or movies.. We live with how they naturally evolve to be and in reality. Relationships in REALITY isn't a daily dose of meeting for organic lattes in quirky Italians shops whilst planning our holiday clearing up land mines in Sierra Leone, kissing in rain, hiring a quartet to play her songs you wrote her, flying off to romantic destinations filled with smiling people with perfect lives. People expect this bullshit and when reality hits them like a meteor they want out because 'Life' taught them to expect only the best. 'The Best' will spontaneously and magically fall into their laps without them having to put any effort in to gain that. They can't commit because they don't know what Life really is. They've never been taught or had the intelligence to see through all the fake-ness that people put out there. You see it on this forum in all its glory more than you see it on that people media, things, whatever the cool kids call it these days. I never bother to keep up or remember it past 2 seconds.
We just seem to gravitate more easily towards historical gender roles and we're both fine with it. And to the obvious envy of friends. 'You guys always seem to have it made'. All the while they struggle for control in their bullshit relationships.
We're a team and help each other. I don't waste my time shopping (I'd rather hack my own testicles off) nor does she waste hers chopping trees down or fighting office wars. It works. We both do what we're good at and whilst it we're not perfect people, we're perfect for each other.
Hey , whatever works!
I agree with your individualists ideals and refusal to do things like everyone else says to. ;)
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It does. That's because we don't listen to 'experts' on how relationships should be. 90% of people survive on wishful thinking in an ideal world/situation/how it is in books or movies.. We live with how they naturally evolve to be and in reality. Relationships in REALITY isn't a daily dose of meeting for organic lattes in quirky Italians shops whilst planning our holiday clearing up land mines in Sierra Leone, kissing in rain, hiring a quartet to play her songs you wrote her, flying off to romantic destinations filled with smiling people with perfect lives. People expect this bullshit and when reality hits them like a meteor they want out because 'Life' taught them to expect only the best. 'The Best' will spontaneously and magically fall into their laps without them having to put any effort in to gain that. They can't commit because they don't know what Life really is. They've never been taught or had the intelligence to see through all the fake-ness that people put out there. You see it on this forum in all its glory more than you see it on that people media, things, whatever the cool kids call it these days. I never bother to keep up or remember it past 2 seconds.
We just seem to gravitate more easily towards historical gender roles and we're both fine with it. And to the obvious envy of friends. 'You guys always seem to have it made'. All the while they struggle for control in their bullshit relationships.
We're a team and help each other. I don't waste my time shopping (I'd rather hack my own testicles off) nor does she waste hers chopping trees down or fighting office wars. It works. We both do what we're good at and whilst it we're not perfect people, we're perfect for each other.
Very good post by the mighty James28
Like I used to say to my Ex, life isnt a lite beer commercial
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Fortress is an intelligent guy, but he never made it past 18,emotionally.
Fuck the world, hail kill.
What the fuck does that even mean. Who am I hailing who am I supposed to be "killing"
Perhaps you are right regarding my emotional maturity. Heck, I don't know.
The "hail and kill" tag is from the band MANOWAR (can't not use all capitals when speaking about the mighty ... MANOWAR). The way I interpret it is, rebel against all you dislike and/or hate and push to triumph over all that stands in your way.
And then when you're dying, say/think, Ah, fuck it all, anyway. Suck it, everyone. ;D
We're the dust of stars. No god is going to retrieve you when your human form dies.
Far from being a downer for me, this reality frees me and allows me to extend more compassion towards those who deserve it.
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Great read and I'm glad that me and the girlfriend don't adhere to much of what's said in that article. As a primary school teacher she earns what I spend on beer every month, and I don't really drink at all. With the business and my full time job I earn enough by a country mile that she never have to think about work again if that's what she wanted. But because it's just me and her there's little point for her to sit at home. She enjoys her job too much. But with my crazy work habits and coming home fucked every night, she takes care of all the chores. I help where I can but it's all her. In return when she goes shopping with her sister or friends I'll give her my debit card (access to the Roman Empire as I call it) and tell her to go wild. She rarely spends more than a few 100 bucks as she feels too bad to spend my money (our money as she calls it). I might take that time that she's away to tidy up around the house and surprise her that way. So it does balance out. I also 'surprise' her with coffee in bed every morning, feed the cats, do any dishes from the night before, as I'm pretty much up never later than 4am. Little things and women love that type of shit.
I think it's also very important to give each other plenty of space. This weekend she's at a baby shower and then having a girls night whilst I'm meeting up with my bros for some top shelf stuff. Tomorrow (Sunday) we'll do something together.
And I might have some whores come down on me for saying this, but I don't think a relationship should be 100% equal. Or 50-50, whichever way you see it. I do however think the illusion of it being equal is quite important, but either one of the slightly more responsible/mature/intelligent party should gently steer the other one towards an agreed upon goal. As long as you never ever abuse that responsibility. And if you earn more than her, never make her ask you for money or blatantly seem like you hold all the good cards (because you do), it breeds resentment. Offer to buy them gifts all the time, if she's a keeper, she won't accept them. Just yesterday I offered her diamond ear rings, a business class ticket to Australia to see her friend next weekend and a fancy handbag. She told me to save 'our' money instead. When I gave her my bank card when she went shopping with her sister, she made a point of it to only buy specials and bring me the receipts, unprompted.
You can train them anyway you like, just be stealthy about it and never abuse that fact.
In Oregon, primary school teachers earn about $60 k a year plus benefits. You must drink very expensive beer.
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Giving advice on relathionships after being 100 years with one person is like giving advices on cars after driving one Toyota camry for 40 years ::)
:DDDDDDDDDD
Your kids may just contribute to making this world better. Imagine if your parents thought the same. All the contribution that you have made to the bodybuilding world, Musclemag, strength world, would have never existed.
This world is violent, yes. As it has ALWAYS been. People today think that they and times that they live in are so special, when in the grand scheme of things, the opposite is true.
We've become a bitter, cynical people. And in general, bitter cynical people don't want to propagate, nor cannot stand one another.
Yes, but they could have as well been another Hitler, who the fuck knows, who the fuck cares. "Good of mankind" is the worst argument for having kids I have ever heard. I do not give a single fuck about "mankind" because "mankind" does not give a single fuck about me. It's only a matter of time before human becomes extinct anyway. If you know anything about probability, if there is any chance something will happen, given enough trial it suddenly becomes very likely to happen. We have means to destroy the world and there is no doubt that we will and the only reason why it will happen is because we can do that and we have shitload of time to do that. So, in grand scheme of things it is irrelevant if you reproduce or not. "What if my parents thought the same"... Parker, what if you were a goat. They didn't, case closed. I do not want to have kids because they are pain in the ass and I hate them. Yeah, may awesome genes won't be passed on, what a fucking shame.
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:DDDDDDDDDD
Yes, but they could have as well been another Hitler, who the fuck knows, who the fuck cares. "Good of mankind" is the worst argument for having kids I have ever heard. I do not give a single fuck about "mankind" because "mankind" does not give a single fuck about me. It's only a matter of time before human becomes extinct anyway. If you know anything about probability, if there is any chance something will happen, given enough trial it suddenly becomes very likely to happen. We have means to destroy the world and there is no doubt that we will and the only reason why it will happen is because we can do that and we have shitload of time to do that. So, in grand scheme of things it is irrelevant if you reproduce or not. "What if my parents thought the same"... Parker, what if you were a goat. They didn't, case closed. I do not want to have kids because they are pain in the ass and I hate them. Yeah, may awesome genes won't be passed on, what a fucking shame.
Why are you so angry, cynical and bitter?
Go outside, look at the goat, say "baaah", and the goat will say "baaaah" back...
Then laugh. And then think, you just had a conversation with a goat.
It's a beautiful thing, life, nature, this world. Full of probability. Thank your parents that you turned out smart, stop focusing on all the negative aspects of life.
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In Oregon, primary school teachers earn about $60 k a year plus benefits. You must drink very expensive beer.
I was speaking in metaphor. I obviously don't drink beer that cost that much. I drink a six pack of Hansa every month. If that. Not much of a drinker at all.
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Howard tell the truth
1) You don't have kids because of your narrow urethra.
2) All your ex-wives left you because of your inability to control your autistic tendencies. You know how you can't ever get your mind of certain subjects and have to talk about them over and over and over and over and over...........
I want you to know I would tell you this if I ever saw you at a local NPC show, minor league baseball game or some fish place.
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Why are you so angry, cynical and bitter?
Go outside, look at the goat, say "baaah", and the goat will say "baaaah" back...
Then laugh. And then think, you just had a conversation with a goat.
It's a beautiful thing, life, nature, this world. Full of probability. Thank your parents that you turned out smart, stop focusing on all the negative aspects of life.
I guess I'm a walking cliche but I blame my parents. They could've been so much more than they are now. My dad was/is or was a tall handsome educated man, a grand lover of Life but never had any balls. He endured a shit job that drove him to drink and when he finally resigned and started his own business, he became rich. But by then the drink had a hold. My mom, a smart, incredibly perceptive lovely woman but to her DNA pathologically scared of ANY change or taking responsibility just endured under the excuse that she's 'doing it for us children'. Children that now lives abroad but she won't spend a penny of her own fortune to visit us unless we pay for her. Maybe in time I can forgive their shortcomings and fuck ups but at 34, I guess I'm still too much of a hothead to do so. I just know that I can't surround myself with people that, I don't know. Small? No ambition apart from making it to the weekend and doing ... fuck all. Just make it to next weekend. Existing. Breathing in and out until the breaths run out and the existence ceases and molecules unbind and go off to form new life .
Definitely a marriage not worth emulating or looking up to. However, as I said in a previous post. Whatever works for them. After 35 years together something must be working.
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Howard tell the truth
1) You don't have kids because of your narrow urethra.
2) All your ex-wives left you because of your inability to control your autistic tendencies. You know how you can't ever get your mind of certain subjects and have to talk about them over and over and over and over and over...........
I want you to know I would tell you this if I ever saw you at a local NPC show, minor league baseball game or some fish place.
Hi Joon!
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Perhaps you are right regarding my emotional maturity. Heck, I don't know.
The "hail and kill" tag is from the band MANOWAR (can't not use all capitals when speaking about the mighty ... MANOWAR). The way I interpret it is, rebel against all you dislike and/or hate and push to triumph over all that stands in your way.
And then when you're dying, say/think, Ah, fuck it all, anyway. Suck it, everyone. ;D
We're the dust of stars. No god is going to retrieve you when your human form dies.
Far from being a downer for me, this reality frees me and allows me to extend more compassion towards those who deserve it.
All good...you're an alright guy, I'd like to see you lighten up man, life is too fucking short
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All good...you're an alright guy, I'd like to see you lighten up man, life is too fucking short
Thanks, dude.
:)
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:DDDDDDDDDD
Yes, but they could have as well been another Hitler, who the fuck knows, who the fuck cares. "Good of mankind" is the worst argument for having kids I have ever heard. I do not give a single fuck about "mankind" because "mankind" does not give a single fuck about me. It's only a matter of time before human becomes extinct anyway. If you know anything about probability, if there is any chance something will happen, given enough trial it suddenly becomes very likely to happen. We have means to destroy the world and there is no doubt that we will and the only reason why it will happen is because we can do that and we have shitload of time to do that. So, in grand scheme of things it is irrelevant if you reproduce or not. "What if my parents thought the same"... Parker, what if you were a goat. They didn't, case closed. I do not want to have kids because they are pain in the ass and I hate them. Yeah, may awesome genes won't be passed on, what a fucking shame.
Like me, you feel that having kids is a pain in the ass.
Too many people have kids and then hate the lifestyle.
They want others to do the same because misery loves company.
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Like me, you feel that having kids is a pain in the ass.
Too many people have kids and then hate the lifestyle.
They want others to do the same because misery loves company.
That and you have a penis too small to inseminate an ovulating woman on fertility drugs.
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That and you have a penis too small to inseminate an ovulating woman on fertility drugs.
Fair enough, you got me on that . :D
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Howard has balls to post on this subject!
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Howard has balls to post on this subject!
LOL, that's the thread, right there :D
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LOL, that's the thread, right there :D
you just gave vince basille confirmation
might as well cut your cock off
and get it done with
you gay elderly bastard
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Hmmmm, I don't want to cheat on my wife and I don't want kids.
Maybe I should shoot off my genitals ?I'll never miss 'em?
I hope you are joking. Your partner might miss them if you didn't have them. I don't know about you, but my genitals are a source of pleasure both to me and at one time to my wife when she was healthy enough for intercourse.
Whether or not you want kids is not relevant to this. Humans are sexual beings. Not all humans make good parents.
If the world were underpopulated, I might take up a different argument with you. But the world is anything but underpopulated. I am all for people choosing not to have children.
Having said that, I love my children and have never once regretted my and my wife's decision to have them and to have known them the last 40 some years. They are good people, better than me, and they are an asset to the world. How can I not take pride in whatever role I may have played in creating them.
You bring this having children thing up a lot. Are you sure that you are completely comfortable with your decision not to have them? Have there been moments when you had second thoughts?
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Hmmmm, I don't want to cheat on my wife and I don't want kids.
Maybe I should shoot off my genitals ?I'll never miss 'em?
Hey H, just happen to glance at your first post on this thread, says you're from NG, been to Augusta (Ft. Gordon) a couple of times. I love the people, friendly as hell!