X2. We can't lose you kwon. 
Let's just say that before 35, i was a positive virile young man that felt he could conquer the world (and had it all, a loving woman, a great outlook on life, money, goals etc), and nowadays after losing it all, (and my health) i just feel like an angry, bitter old man. (even though i'm not even 50)
But you do what you can do.
It's not especially uplifting either seeing what's happened to sweden or the areas around you that you used to love, that sure doesn't help the situation. Very depressing.
I both look (and feel) like a bag of smashed assholes these days, and i'm sure if i went to a shrink today (i've never visited one), he'd prolly diagnose me with everything in the book.