Brian Hankins Rises Like a Phoenix (On GetBig.com)
The Iron Resurrection Chronicles
Beneath locked threads and mod-whispered bans,
Where avatars fade like tren from hands,
Where reps were won, and souls were flamed—
He stirs once more, unbanned, unnamed.
A glitch.
A post.
A thread revived.
Brian Hankins — back. Alive.
No burner account. No alias fake.
No sock puppet. No natty snake.
Rising like a phoenix, wings of fire,
He logs in clean with pure desire.
“Still natty. Still alpha. Still better than you.”
The forum blinks—could it be true?
Shizzo cries from a bench in the void,
“Brother Hankins! I was never paranoid!”
He posts ten vids, does a half pull-up,
Then speaks in tongues about filling cups.
240isback appears on cue,
Whispers, “Life is pain, but pain is true.”
He links a paper, then vanishes again—
Back to thinking about T-nation sin.
Vince Goodrum releases a statement, bold:
“I have no beef, but Hankins is cold.
If he steps to me, he best be clean—
No fake natty, no injectable lean.”
Then links a press kit, and three domain names,
And challenges Hankins to legal games.
But Hankins grins, just one reply:
“You wrote a book no one will buy.”
Thread explodes. Mods lose control.
GetBig burns with protein soul.
Funk51 drops in with studies from Mars,
Citing clenbuterol found in prison bars.
“Studies show Hankins can’t be beat,
His muscle density defies elite.”
The trolls regroup. They post old memes.
They quote old bans, revive old schemes.
But Hankins deadlifts every lie—
He’s recomped truth, and bulked sky high.
He calls out whey shills, flexes past mods,
Mocks sponsored links and fake mirage gods.
No IG clout, no TikTok fame,
Just chalk-stained hands and iron flame.
So hail the king, whose flame won’t dim—
From permaban’s pit, they couldn’t end him.
With GH15 shaking in chem-sweat fear,
And Vince still typing press kits near—
This tale is inked in BCAA blood,
In mod tears, and a natty flood.
For from GetBig’s broken thread of dread…
Brian Hankins rose from the dead.
⸻