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Getbig Main Boards => Gossip & Opinions => Topic started by: DanielPaul on October 09, 2013, 06:17:58 PM
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How about we start a thread where we each tell a true story about ourselves that best identifies you as a getbigger...
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I once attended a party where a women who lost her legs in a car accident was giving blow jobs to any man who wanted one. Her wheel chair wouldn't fit through the bathroom door so she had to crawl across the floor into the bathroom.
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Is this true?
Yep.
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I carried a person that did not have legs. Civic duty.
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I once attended a party where a women who lost her legs in a car accident was giving blow jobs to any man who wanted one. Her wheel chair wouldn't fit through the bathroom door so she had to crawl across the floor into the bathroom.
you are a fucking king getbigger, awesome story
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This next admission will make me a real getbigger. Out of all the people there, only myself and one other person did not receive a blow job.
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This next admission will make me a real getbigger. Out of all the people there, only myself and one other person did not receive a blow job.
So you guys were helping her give them out, very honorable of you to make such a sacrifice for the mangled chick.
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I was gunna tell a story about fuckIng a fat chick but no way, not now
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Outed.
So you guys were helping her give them out, very honorable of you to make such a sacrifice for the mangled chick.
Hahahah ;D
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When I was in high school back in the 90s my girlfriend went out of state for the summer so I started fucking her best friend. So after my girl returned I stopped and then a week later my girls bf calls me and says we need to talk and we get together and she tells me " I'm pregnant" to which I reply "by who" and she starts crying and says it's mine, so I tell her that she should get back together with her ex FUCK him and blame it on him ;D ..... she says no, so a couple of weeks go by and I'm fucking scared to death because I catch her spending all kinds of time around my sisters and my girlfriend FUCK I even caught her talking to my mom I absolutely thought I was fucked then it happened, she calls me about a week later and says your in the clear I miscarried... I responded to that by saying " Oh thank God"then she hung up...
TRUE GETBIGGER APPROVED
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When I was 4 years old I got a toy fire truck for Christmas. .so I went to the woods next to my house with a book of matches and started a fire..to put out with my toy fire trucks WORKING water nozzle !!
When the fire department got there I had burned down the entire woods and set an apartment building on fire..
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When I was 4 years old I got a toy fire truck for Christmas. .so I went to the woods next to my house with a book of matches and started a fire..to put out with my toy fire trucks WORKING water nozzle !!
When the fire department got there I had burned down the entire woods and set an apartment building on fire..
I fucking laughed out loud
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In my defense, this girl not only lost her legs but suffered a head injury. Receiving a blow job from a drunk girl with a head injury didn't sound appealing to me.
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In my defense, this girl not only lost her legs but suffered a head injury. Receiving a blow job from a drunk girl with a head injury didn't sound appealing to me.
I would have fucked her and stolen her money.
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I once attended a party where a women who lost her legs in a car accident was giving blow jobs to any man who wanted one. Her wheel chair wouldn't fit through the bathroom door so she had to crawl across the floor into the bathroom.
This is not a story about you, it is a story about a woman who lost her legs and is now giving blow jobs in bathrooms.
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This is not a story about you, it is a story about a woman who lost her legs and is now giving blow jobs in bathrooms.
It's obviously Archers mum
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i once shit in a salmon and placed it inside of a friends car...in the Texas summer!
bench
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When I was a teenager, I drove up a Ventura freeway off ramp in Woodland Hills CA with a car full of friends on a dare at around midnight. Fortunately, no one was exiting at the time. I flipped a U and got the heck out of there. We were such idiots, we all thought this was funny.
When I was sixteen, I went to a New Years party in Hollywood, CA with friends. I brought a fifth of Vodka and drank most of it. When I had to piss, I pissed out the apartment window. In the early hours of the morning, I was sleeping in the car I had gone to the party in. Only problem was that it was the right make and model but not the right car. The owner came out to go to work, saw me sleeping in her car and called the police. I told them a sob story of epic proportions and they let me go with instructions to walk home. Problem was, I'd left my shoes and my jacket at the party. When I went up to get them, they were gone along with my wallet which had been in my jacket pocket. I walked from Hollywood to Encino in my bare feet. When I finally climbed into my own bed, my mom came in and announced that I had chores to do and not to expect to sleep all day. Thanks mom!
My wife who was my girlfriend at the time and I went to a Budweiser sponsored college party. I got loaded and when she dropped me off at my apartment, I threw up on the front lawn while she watched. She still married me.
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When I was a teenager, I drove up a Ventura freeway off ramp in Woodland Hills CA with a car full of friends on a dare at around midnight. Fortunately, no one was exiting at the time. I flipped a U and got the heck out of there. We were such idiots, we all thought this was funny.
When I was sixteen, I went to a New Years party in Hollywood, CA with friends. I brought a fifth of Vodka and drank most of it. When I had to piss, I pissed out the apartment window. In the early hours of the morning, I was sleeping in the car I had gone to the party in. Only problem was that it was the right make and model but not the right car. The owner came out to go to work, saw me sleeping in her car and called the police. I told them a sob story of epic proportions and they let me go with instructions to walk home. Problem was, I'd left my shoes and my jacket at the party. When I went up to get them, they were gone along with my wallet which had been in my jacket pocket. I walked from Hollywood to Encino in my bare feet. When I finally climbed into my own bed, my mom came in and announced that I had chores to do and not to expect to sleep all day. Thanks mom!
My wife who was my girlfriend at the time and I went to a Budweiser sponsored college party. I got loaded and when she dropped me off at my apartment, I threw up on the front lawn while she watched. She still married me.
It's not true love unless your girl has helped you puke in the toilet and clean you up after a night out.
8)
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I bought a boatload of M1T, 1-Test and 4AD powder from 1fast400/bulknutrition just before the prohormone ban of 2004 with plans of using it in the future. Ended up throwing it all away a year later after a car accident left me unable to train.
Still natty to this day but yes, I regret throwing all that gear in the trash especially the M1T which was known for some serious mass. I'll probably start my first cycle in a year or so.
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I like big tits. The end.
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Once i was taking a piss in the garden on a typicall friday night well on my way though a bottke of vodka when just at that second the pizza delivery bloke came through the gate. Tried to hold it and put it away but failed miserably and pissed my pants l.
Every week from then on when he dropped off our pizza he would point at me and in his stupid eastern european accent say "hoho pissy,pissy,pissy"
What a c unt.
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I like big tits. The end.
pics or it didnt happen
bench
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Once dropped off a friend in front of her downtown apartment building. When she got out of my car there was a person nearby who fell out of their wheel chair. My friend rushed over to help while I stayed in my car laughing then drove off.
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2nd year uni I'd just hooked up with a cute Vet Science student from the country before our end of term 2 week exam period. As usual, I only had a couple of exams, but one of them was always on the last freakin' day, while my vet had all hers done and out of the way after the first week. I agreed to go to her parents place once I was finished.
I arrived late at night, she tells me her family are really excited to meet me, I say "great" and then we set about reacquainting ourselves.
Anyway, next morning I wake up alone in bed, hear people talking downstairs, look at my watch and realise it's already 9 (early risers in the country) and they're all probably waiting for me, so I pull on some clothes and head off downstairs to say g'day to everyone and make a good first impression.
I arrive, girlfriend looks at me, screams and runs away, mother is just staring at me from the kitchen and dad is looking none too happy.
And I've literally just stepped off the bottom step. I'm standing there thinking "I must have some serious pillow hair going on", when dad says "You might want to check the mirror son."
I'd arrived for breakfast with a goatee of dried menstrual blood all over my face.
Needless to say, the vet and I didn't last too long after that.
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How about we start a thread where we each tell a true story about ourselves that best identifies you as a getbigger...
Only if Anabolichalo go 1st :) & Wiggs 2nd :)
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When I was 4 years old I got a toy fire truck for Christmas. .so I went to the woods next to my house with a book of matches and started a fire..to put out with my toy fire trucks WORKING water nozzle !!
When the fire department got there I had burned down the entire woods and set an apartment building on fire..
!
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When I was 4 years old I got a toy fire truck for Christmas. .so I went to the woods next to my house with a book of matches and started a fire..to put out with my toy fire trucks WORKING water nozzle !!
When the fire department got there I had burned down the entire woods and set an apartment building on fire..
Hahahahaha!!! When I was about 7/8 my and my best pal did the same thing in a deserted brushland, right next to the main shopping street. First we would set one match, let the bushes burn a little and then stamp it out, then two matches at the same time, let the fire get a little bigger and stamp it out again, and so on until we had used the first box. I grabbed the second box and set the whole thing at once and threw it into a bush (bear in mind the whole field was completely white dry brush lol) so the whole place goes up in under a minute and we run to the bottom of the road into a police station, I run to the front desk and shout "Quick, Quick the wasteground is on fire!!! There were two black kids messing with a lighter and they cycled away on their bikes!!!" the policeman is like "Well done boys, thanks for coming to tell us" I go home and tell my mum the story about the black boys and how we saved the day and she goes "Well that's funny, I just had Kirk's mum on the phone who's window overlooks the wasteground and she said that you and Grant were fucking about with matches and set the whole place on fire!!! You're grounded for the whole summer holidays." ;D ;D ;D
Six motherfucking weeks.
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I got shot in the balls. A fragment from a 9mm sub machine gun burned a hole through my pants. I felt it hit and immediately dropped trou to see how bad. I found the still hot brass jacket singed into the side of #2 ball, but did not penetrate. BRASS BALLS.
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I once was meeting friends for a ski trip and drove to the wrong mountain. 300 miles in the wrong direction
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I once was meeting friends for a ski trip and drove to the wrong mountain. 300 miles in the wrong direction
Lol! Was there still some snow there?
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Lol! Was there still some snow there?
i wasn't a big snow person anyway. There was a bar, that sufficed.
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i wasn't a big snow person anyway. There was a bar, that sufficed.
You at least ordered a Snowball though?
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Walking downtown on the sidewalk, I saw the this hot hoe across the street had my head turned and walked right into a light pole that shit hurt and was embarrassing people laughing and shit.
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Walking downtown on the sidewalk, I saw the this hot hoe across the street had my head turned and walked right into a light pole that shit hurt and was embarrassing people laughing and shit.
Oh man, i've done that and it stings. Luckily it was evening though so not many peeps about - what made it worse was the fact I was looking backwards to shout goodbye to a friend across the street and the pole in my face conicided with me quickly turning my head round to the front! Double impact lol, it felt like someone had ran and hit me with an Alu bat
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This is not a story about you, it is a story about a woman who lost her legs and is now giving blow jobs in bathrooms.
It's a personal experience I had.
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It's a personal experience I had.
Primemuscle is just mad because he tried to wheel his wife into the bathroom after reading your post, and even after hoisting her out the chair, her fat ass got stuck in the doorway
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Oh man, i've done that and it stings. Luckily it was evening though so not many peeps about - what made it worse was the fact I was looking backwards to shout goodbye to a friend across the street and the pole in my face conicided with me quickly turning my head round to the front! Double impact lol, it felt like someone had ran and hit me with an Alu bat
;D See why it hurts so bad you dont seeing coming.
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Primemuscle is just mad because he tried to wheel his wife into the bathroom after reading your post, and even after hoisting her out the chair, her fat ass got stuck in the doorway
Hahahaha.
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I used to sit in the Walmart parking lot and tug it to the tard girl that they let gather carts.
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I used to sit in the Walmart parking lot and tug it to Karl Kox while he was tugging it to the tard girl that they let gather carts.
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When I was younger I went out drinking and woke up the next morning next to a girl so ugly I left my own apartment.
....I literally walked around the neighborhood all morning until I knew she left.
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When I was younger I went out drinking and woke up the next morning next to a girl so ugly I left my own apartment.
....I literally walked around the neighborhood all morning until I knew she left.
My mom is always asking me how you're doing.
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When I was younger I went out drinking and woke up the next morning next to a girl so ugly I left my own apartment.
....I literally walked around the neighborhood all morning until I knew she left.
Respect
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My mom is always asking me how you're doing.
Fuck ;D
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When I was 12 or 13 I set the woods on fire down the street from my house! My brother and I waited down the block and watched the fire dept put it out! Wasn't every Getbigger a pyromaniac when they were kids?
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Oh man, i've done that and it stings. Luckily it was evening though so not many peeps about - what made it worse was the fact I was looking backwards to shout goodbye to a friend across the street and the pole in my face conicided with me quickly turning my head round to the front! Double impact lol, it felt like someone had ran and hit me with an Alu bat
I had that happen to me while leaving Sainsbury's, turned my head to watch an incredible arse walk into the supermarket and crashed onto the front part of the car, fucking up my knee.
Bitch was worth it though ;D
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London underground 1999.
Me and my best pal were on our way to a party when we spot an incredibly sexy black bitch walk into the wagon.
We were preparing to take French exams later in the week so we were on top form (or so we thought). I turn to him and say the French equivalent of "I wouldn't shag the arse off that munter if they paid me".
She turns to me, calm as cucumber, and says in French: "Oh, really?"
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When I was 12 or 13 I set the woods on fire down the street from my house! My brother and I waited down the block and watched the fire dept put it out! Wasn't every Getbigger a pyromaniac when they were kids?
I too enjoyed playing with fire , blowing things up.. as a young lad I had been lighting firecrackers and dropping them down a crevasse in concrete floor of a large wooden back yard tool shed when mum called me to supper, I ran to the house to eat didn't realize the shed had caught fire till we all heard the fire engines siren, shed burned to the ground ;D
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Sailed a 27 foot monohull with my friend from Key West to Cancun. I had several trips behind me and never ever had sea sickness. About 2 hours into the trip had a little enigine trouble. Stuck my head down into the engine bay to see what was wrong. When I stood up I was truly introduced to sea sickness. The trip took 8 days. I couldn't keep anything down except for coca cola and raisins ??? ???Anything else would come right back up and over the side of the boat.
Along the way I sailed through miles of iridescent algae in the middle of the night..... One night I swear to christ I heard darth vader breathing next to me, I looked over the side of the ship and saw 2 dolphins on each side of boat blowing water through their dorsal gill. Sounded just like darth vader. They swam next to me all night..... Almost ran into an underwater pipe that was about 2 miles long and being transported just a few feet beneath the surface of the water by some spanish speaking engineering rig. I couldn't speak spanish so when they tried contacting me on the short wave radio I had no fucking clue what they were talking about. Fortunately my buddy woke up and heard the warning.... At one point we were about a mile off the coast of Cuba. Talk about pristine water....Upon arrival in Cancun I was surrounded by the Mexican Navy. Who the fuck knew Mexico had a Navy? Turns out President Fox was arriving in Cancun the next morning.
I lost around 10 to 15 pounds on that trip. When I got back to the States I read in a local paper that 2 guys in a 25 foot monohull took the same route we took during the same week and they were never seen again. I have not sailed since.
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Once i was taking a piss in the garden on a typicall friday night well on my way though a bottke of vodka when just at that second the pizza delivery bloke came through the gate. Tried to hold it and put it away but failed miserably and pissed my pants l.
Every week from then on when he dropped off our pizza he would point at me and in his stupid eastern european accent say "hoho pissy,pissy,pissy"
What a c unt.
;D
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I too enjoyed playing with fire , blowing things up.. as a young lad I had been lighting firecrackers and dropping them down a crevasse in concrete floor of a large wooden back yard tool shed when mum called me to supper, I ran to the house to eat didn't realize the shed had caught fire till we all heard the fire engines siren, shed burned to the ground ;D
I had a cherry bomb that I had left over from Fourth of July! They are like M 80's loud as hell! I lit it and threw on a neighbors roof that lived in the house below mine! It was so loud it sounded like bomb! I took off into my house. I was sure someone would call the cops thinking there was an explosion in their house!
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my friend and i used to glue fins and launch tubes directly onto those model rocket engines and shoot them off. we didn't have the patience to wait for the glue to dry. so one goes off all haywire, and lands on a neighbors roof, still firing away. instead of just running away (no one actually saw us light it), we decided to run out front and act like we saw it flying over our heads or something, like we were as surprised as anyone. Busted immediately.
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Sailed a 27 foot monohull with my friend from Key West to Cancun. I had several trips behind me and never ever had sea sickness. About 2 hours into the trip had a little enigine trouble. Stuck my head down into the engine bay to see what was wrong. When I stood up I was truly introduced to sea sickness. The trip took 8 days. I couldn't keep anything down except for coca cola and raisins ??? ???Anything else would come right back up and over the side of the boat.
Along the way I sailed through miles of iridescent algae in the middle of the night..... One night I swear to christ I heard darth vader breathing next to me, I looked over the side of the ship and saw 2 dolphins on each side of boat blowing water through their dorsal gill. Sounded just like darth vader. They swam next to me all night..... Almost ran into an underwater pipe that was about 2 miles long and being transported just a few feet beneath the surface of the water by some spanish speaking engineering rig. I couldn't speak spanish so when they tried contacting me on the short wave radio I had no fucking clue what they were talking about. Fortunately my buddy woke up and heard the warning.... At one point we were about a mile off the coast of Cuba. Talk about pristine water....Upon arrival in Cancun I was surrounded by the Mexican Navy. Who the fuck knew Mexico had a Navy? Turns out President Fox was arriving in Cancun the next morning.
I lost around 10 to 15 pounds on that trip. When I got back to the States I read in a local paper that 2 guys in a 25 foot monohull took the same route we took during the same week and they were never seen again. I have not sailed since.
Cool story!
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Once i had this girl eating my asshole, i had a lot of protein shakes that day and i felt the urge to fart, so without warning her i let loose a loud really stinky fart, needless to say the look on her face was priceless.
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Once i had this girl eating my asshole, i had a lot of protein shakes that day and i felt the urge to fart, so without warning her i let loose a loud really stinky fart, needless to say the look on her face was priceless.
A job well done.
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my friend and i used to glue fins and launch tubes directly onto those model rocket engines and shoot them off. we didn't have the patience to wait for the glue to dry. so one goes off all haywire, and lands on a neighbors roof, still firing away. instead of just running away (no one actually saw us light it), we decided to run out front and act like we saw it flying over our heads or something, like we were as surprised as anyone. Busted immediately.
Used to do the same thing with model rockets! My friend and I used to buy the under water fusing used to launch them, and walk around throwing it into puddles and watch it burn!
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:D
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Hahahahaha!!! When I was about 7/8 my and my best pal did the same thing in a deserted brushland, right next to the main shopping street. First we would set one match, let the bushes burn a little and then stamp it out, then two matches at the same time, let the fire get a little bigger and stamp it out again, and so on until we had used the first box. I grabbed the second box and set the whole thing at once and threw it into a bush (bear in mind the whole field was completely white dry brush lol) so the whole place goes up in under a minute and we run to the bottom of the road into a police station, I run to the front desk and shout "Quick, Quick the wasteground is on fire!!! There were two black kids messing with a lighter and they cycled away on their bikes!!!" the policeman is like "Well done boys, thanks for coming to tell us" I go home and tell my mum the story about the black boys and how we saved the day and she goes "Well that's funny, I just had Kirk's mum on the phone who's window overlooks the wasteground and she said that you and Grant were fucking about with matches and set the whole place on fire!!! You're grounded for the whole summer holidays." ;D ;D ;D
Six motherfucking weeks.
Pwned....hahahahaaa
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I set my parents kitchen on fire when I was 12.....thought I knew how to cook.....I didn't.
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Lots of pyromaniacs in this thread ::)
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Lots of pyromaniacs in this thread ::)
I tossed a few M80's into someons house once through the mail slot in their front door
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I once attended a party where a women who lost her legs in a car accident was giving blow jobs to any man who wanted one. Her wheel chair wouldn't fit through the bathroom door so she had to crawl across the floor into the bathroom.
Did you partake???....
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In my defense, this girl not only lost her legs but suffered a head injury. Receiving a blow job from a drunk girl with a head injury didn't sound appealing to me.
Was it a "group" scenario where multiple men were around her chair, or was she sequestered off in some "crazy wheelchair chick blowjob room" to the side?
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Once when I was about 20 years old I met three different women in the span of about two weeks.....I used to walk around with business cards with my name and number on them so I wouldn't have to fumble for a pen and paper to write my number down for chicks.......anyway about a week or so after meeting said women I get a phone call from one of them finally........then all of a sudden the other women get on the line through three-way calling (remember that?)......anyway turns out ALL THREE WERE SISTERS!!!!!!!...what are the fucking odds of that??????
They tore into me big time.....I felt like a little lost lamb with his balls cut off..........One sister said that she had visited her sister's house and she saw my card on her sister's dresser and said to herself "Ive seen that card somewhere"............then she visited the other sister and found my card there as well and she put two and two together.....I was horrified...LOL..it was very traumatic ;D
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Was it a "group" scenario where multiple men were around her chair, or was she sequestered off in some "crazy wheelchair chick blowjob room" to the side?
She was on the bathroom floor and the guys would sit on the toilet. Couldn't fit her chair through the bathroom door so she crawled, dragging her stumps behind her. Guys would go in one after the other.
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She was on the bathroom floor and the guys would sit on the toilet. Couldn't fit her chair through the bathroom door so she crawled, dragging her stumps behind her. Guys would go in one after the other.
Ah the romance of it all.
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Ah the romance of it all.
I'm sure she thinks back fondly on those times at whatever group home she's currently residing.
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She was on the bathroom floor and the guys would sit on the toilet. Couldn't fit her chair through the bathroom door so she crawled, dragging her stumps behind her. Guys would go in one after the other.
Wow. Were any blumpkins administered that night, consciously or otherwise?
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Wow. Were any blumpkins administered that night, consciously or otherwise?
Maybe, I wasn't in there. When I did look in the toilet lid was down. I never heard any flushing.
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I once attended a party where a women who lost her legs in a car accident was giving blow jobs to any man who wanted one. Her wheel chair wouldn't fit through the bathroom door so she had to crawl across the floor into the bathroom.
So all I had to do was say I lost my legs in a car accident?
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So all I had to do was say I lost my legs in a car accident?
What do you usually say?
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What do you usually say?
I died In a car accident.
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I died In a car accident.
Yes. I remember when that happened and when you came back to life and some folks were pissed off because you weren't still dead. Sometimes it is better to stay dead once you die.
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Yes. I remember when that happened and when you came back to life and some folks were pissed off because you weren't still dead. Sometimes it is better to stay dead once you die.
hahahaha.
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Back in the good old days when "middle school" was properly called "junior high" we first got the experience of picking electives...sort of...
All the 7th grade that weren't in band took one unit of music, one of art, and one of either wood shop or home economics. Back then, most girls took home ec and most boys took wood shop (I realize that today most schools now make all students take all four)...
As a joke, I told several of my friends that I was going to sign up for home ec...I made up a b.s. story about "my cousin up in Maryland" who took home ec and was the only guy in the class, and that because the girls admired his "modern, sensitive" outlook, he got more tail than you could shake a stick at...
Sure enough, these guys told others (despite me "making them promise not to tell anyone about my plan") and that spring, 26 young men found themselves in the first (and likely only) all-male home ec class in the history of our school. I took wood shop like any heterosexual young man would...and told several girls that these guys were all queers and got myself some unexpected cheerleader tail for good measure.
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hahahaha.
Let me hasten to add that I for one, am happy you came back to life. So, how is life after death anyway? This is something I probably should learn about pretty soon, considering my age and all. ;D
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I tossed a few M80's into someons house once through the mail slot in their front door
Your first hate crime?
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I kissed a girl during recess when I was in 5th grade. We both wore braces. The wires on our braces somehow got tangled up right when the bell rang. We were late getting back to class. We never kissed again....too traumatic!
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Let me hasten to add that I for one, am happy you came back to life. So, how is life after death anyway? This is something I probably should learn about pretty soon, considering my age and all. ;D
I will not have sex with you prime. Even if I have no legs.
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I kissed a girl during recess when I was in 5th grade. We both wore braces. The wires on our braces somehow got tangled up right when the bell rang. We were late getting back to class. We never kissed again....too traumatic!
you should have told everyone she hurt your schlong blowing you...they would have called her black&decker pecker wrecker until she hung herself
and you call yourself a getbigger ::)
:D
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I will not have sex with you prime. Even if I have no legs.
What if I only have one good leg? Will you have sex with me then or do I have to wait until after I finish physical therapy and both legs are working?
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What if I only have one good leg? Will you have sex with me then or do I have to wait until after I finish physical therapy and both legs are working?
I there a creep button?
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you should have told everyone she hurt your schlong blowing you...they would have called her black&decker pecker wrecker until she hung herself
and you call yourself a getbigger ::)
:D
-Live and learn. Of course I don't think I can pass as a 5th grader these days, so I clearly lost my shot at being a true Getbigger.
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I there a creep button?
On my leg?
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-Live and learn. Of course I don't think I can pass on a 5th grader these days, so I clearly lost my shot at being a true Getbigger.
Fixed ;D
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-Live and learn. Of course I don't think I can pass as a 5th grader these days, so I clearly lost my shot at being a true Getbigger.
it's never too late, but it does get harder as one ages
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Fixed ;D
Has anyone ever told you that you have a perverse way of thinking?
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Has anyone ever told you that you have a perverse way of thinking?
No
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it's never too late, but it does get harder as one ages
Yes, but I don't wear braces anymore. ;D
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No
Well then, consider yourself informed.
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Well then, consider yourself informed.
Of what?
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Of what?
Keep up with the program. You are a perverted son of a bitch, that's what.
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Keep up with the program. You are a perverted son of a bitch, that's what.
You're the one who said it.
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You're the one who said it.
Perhaps you should reread the post you supposedly "fixed."
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Perhaps you should reread the post you supposedly "fixed."
I read between the lines. It was pretty obvious that's what you meant.
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Hahahahaha!!! When I was about 7/8 my and my best pal did the same thing in a deserted brushland, right next to the main shopping street. First we would set one match, let the bushes burn a little and then stamp it out, then two matches at the same time, let the fire get a little bigger and stamp it out again, and so on until we had used the first box. I grabbed the second box and set the whole thing at once and threw it into a bush (bear in mind the whole field was completely white dry brush lol) so the whole place goes up in under a minute and we run to the bottom of the road into a police station, I run to the front desk and shout "Quick, Quick the wasteground is on fire!!! There were two black kids messing with a lighter and they cycled away on their bikes!!!" the policeman is like "Well done boys, thanks for coming to tell us" I go home and tell my mum the story about the black boys and how we saved the day and she goes "Well that's funny, I just had Kirk's mum on the phone who's window overlooks the wasteground and she said that you and Grant were fucking about with matches and set the whole place on fire!!! You're grounded for the whole summer holidays." ;D ;D ;D
Six motherfucking weeks.
and not a single fuck was given about two black kids wrongly accused arrested and jailed by the white cops.
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and not a single fuck was given about two black kids wrongly accused arrested and jailed by the white cops.
Haha. Great thread guys
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I fucking laughed out loud
Loll...as I'm laughing out loud I read your comment. Haha!
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During a high school whoreticulture class we had these big plastic barrels full of scrap plants and dirt that had to be emptied in the dumpster after a while. Being the only getbigger in the greenhouse of course I had to do it. I carried this 600lb barrel across the 300 yard parking lot to a dumpster behind the vocational building. The dumpster had just been emptied so there was nothing in it and when I emptied the barrel into the side sliding door I accidentally dropped the barrel in. I looked around and since there was no one out there I just went dumpster diving to get it out. I was inside that thing for at least a minute banging around trying to pick a barrel up inside a cramped dumpster and finally pushed it out the side door and then fell out head first behind it. when I got up there was a whole auto class of rednecks all turned around staring open mouthed at me like I was a 20-something year old man in a bunny costume with the ass hole ripped out.
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Rookies. ::)
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:D
Your 5 min are up. No forearms=new TRT user that uses wrist straps and shity form while training arms,claims natty,FILT ::)
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(https://scontent-b-ams.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1379714_10151426960162325_1916852749_n.jpg)
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Got wasted on tequila ::) once. Well, I was already plenty drunk, and then I took 20 (yes, 20) shots of tequila in a row. Got to a bathroom somehow. Sat down to take a dump, and blacked out. A few hours later I was woken up because they were taking the door out of the stall to get me out. I know it was a few hours later, because it turned out I had puked into my crotch, filling my pants and underwear with tequila barf. Which had become crunchy already. :-X
They loaded me into the back of a van (275 Lbs at the time, so no easy feat) and rolled me out near my apartment. Woke up in bed, so apparently I figured out how my key worked. ;D
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i was 4 y.o. I was playing with my dick and start to get a boner. Didnt know what it was. Started to cry and called my parent.
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Back in the good old days when "middle school" was properly called "junior high" we first got the experience of picking electives...sort of...
All the 7th grade that weren't in band took one unit of music, one of art, and one of either wood shop or home economics. Back then, most girls took home ec and most boys took wood shop (I realize that today most schools now make all students take all four)...
As a joke, I told several of my friends that I was going to sign up for home ec...I made up a b.s. story about "my cousin up in Maryland" who took home ec and was the only guy in the class, and that because the girls admired his "modern, sensitive" outlook, he got more tail than you could shake a stick at...
Sure enough, these guys told others (despite me "making them promise not to tell anyone about my plan") and that spring, 26 young men found themselves in the first (and likely only) all-male home ec class in the history of our school. I took wood shop like any heterosexual young man would...and told several girls that these guys were all queers and got myself some unexpected cheerleader tail for good measure.
Genius!
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I had that happen to me while leaving Sainsbury's, turned my head to watch an incredible arse walk into the supermarket and crashed onto the front part of the car, fucking up my knee.
Bitch was worth it though ;D
Lol Sainsburys brings back bad memories of me and the wife going christmas shopping there a few years back, I'm pushing the trolley and periodically running with it and doing muscle ups on the handle, my wife tells me 3 or 4 times to stop doing it in case I make a pratt of myself, so I do it one more time with extra gusto and the back of the trolley goes towards the floor while i'm running full speed (and mid-jump) hahahaha, It took every ounce of getbig power within me to run the same speed as the trolley and gradually get it upright (my head is about 2 inches from the car park floor the whole time btw) and when I eventually look up there's a HUGE queue of shoppers waiting for taxi's laughing their evil asses off at me (even the children were laughing) My wife is sooooo embarrassed so I did the only thing I could think of to diffuse the situation - turned to the queue of mockery and pull a massive front double bi and then a theatrical bow!!!! This helped diffuse the situation a little
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Lol Sainsburys brings back bad memories of me and the wife going christmas shopping there a few years back, I'm pushing the trolley and periodically running with it and doing muscle ups on the handle, my wife tells me 3 or 4 times to stop doing it in case I make a pratt of myself, so I do it one more time with extra gusto and the back of the trolley goes towards the floor while i'm running full speed (and mid-jump) hahahaha, It took every ounce of getbig power within me to run the same speed as the trolley and gradually get it upright (my head is about 2 inches from the car park floor the whole time btw) and when I eventually look up there's a HUGE queue of shoppers waiting for taxi's laughing their evil asses off at me (even the children were laughing) My wife is sooooo embarrassed so I did the only thing I could think of to diffuse the situation - turned to the queue of mockery and pull a massive front double bi and then a theatrical bow!!!! This helped diffuse the situation a little
shopping trolley power slides are the most important part of a shopping trip
I wish I had a pound for every time ive power slid round a corner and hit someone in the back of the legs
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I've mentioned this before, but here it goes again:
When I was almost 16 (two months away) I went to my friends house to play video games, I didn't know he was trying out for our school's football team (I was on the soccer team)
so our days were mixed up! His Mom invited me in, fed me dinner, and joined me in playing (Intellivision back then, 1980's) video games. She eventually put her hand on my knee,
and I turned beet-red, my mouth was dry as fuck, and my heart was racing... she said to me bluntly "Let's go to the bedroom". Nine months later, my friend informed everyone his
Mom had a baby brother! When he got older, he had straight hair (everyone else in the family had extreme curly hair), and I have straight hair...
P.S. YES, this is a TRUE story!!
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I read between the lines. It was pretty obvious that's what you meant.
And you just made my point.
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And you just made my point.
It's consistent with your character.
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It's consistent with your character.
You don't know my character.
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Yes, but I don't now wear braces anymore on my legs. :-\
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You don't know my character.
Its seems like you.
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Back in the good old days when "middle school" was properly called "junior high" we first got the experience of picking electives...sort of...
All the 7th grade that weren't in band took one unit of music, one of art, and one of either wood shop or home economics. Back then, most girls took home ec and most boys took wood shop (I realize that today most schools now make all students take all four)...
As a joke, I told several of my friends that I was going to sign up for home ec...I made up a b.s. story about "my cousin up in Maryland" who took home ec and was the only guy in the class, and that because the girls admired his "modern, sensitive" outlook, he got more tail than you could shake a stick at...
Sure enough, these guys told others (despite me "making them promise not to tell anyone about my plan") and that spring, 26 young men found themselves in the first (and likely only) all-male home ec class in the history of our school. I took wood shop like any heterosexual young man would...and told several girls that these guys were all queers and got myself some unexpected cheerleader tail for good measure.
Sounds a bit ambitious. ..and you were fucking girls in the 7th grade ? Not buying it.
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Sounds a bit ambitious. ..and you were fucking girls in the 7th grade ? Not buying it.
I got laid the first time at about the end of the 8th grade, so 7th grade pussy doesn't sound too unlikely.
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When I was a teenager, I drove up a Ventura freeway off ramp in Woodland Hills CA with a car full of friends on a dare at around midnight. Fortunately, no one was exiting at the time. I flipped a U and got the heck out of there. We were such idiots, we all thought this was funny.
When I was sixteen, I went to a New Years party in Hollywood, CA with friends. I brought a fifth of Vodka and drank most of it. When I had to piss, I pissed out the apartment window. In the early hours of the morning, I was sleeping in the car I had gone to the party in. Only problem was that it was the right make and model but not the right car. The owner came out to go to work, saw me sleeping in her car and called the police. I told them a sob story of epic proportions and they let me go with instructions to walk home. Problem was, I'd left my shoes and my jacket at the party. When I went up to get them, they were gone along with my wallet which had been in my jacket pocket. I walked from Hollywood to Encino in my bare feet. When I finally climbed into my own bed, my mom came in and announced that I had chores to do and not to expect to sleep all day. Thanks mom!
My wife who was my girlfriend at the time and I went to a Budweiser sponsored college party. I got loaded and when she dropped me off at my apartment, I threw up on the front lawn while she watched. She still married me.
You walked from Hollywood to Encino??? Bare feet????? OMG!!!!!!!
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I got laid the first time at about the end of the 8th grade, so 7th grade pussy doesn't sound too unlikely.
7th grade is 11-12 years old. pre-puberty. and this guy is banging "cheerleader tail"....please ::)
and I'm sure Ferris Bueller here got 30 7th grade boys to sign up for Home Ec. without one person saying a word. it's bullshit.
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7th grade is 11-12 years old. pre-puberty. and this guy is banging "cheerleader tail"....please ::)
and I'm sure Ferris Bueller here got 30 7th grade boys to sign up for Home Ec. without one person saying a word. it's bullshit.
I agree, it's most likely a bullshit story.
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Traveled around the Country for a year and 1/2 with 3 strippers while they worked in various towns across Canada. Good times.
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You walked from Hollywood to Encino??? Bare feet????? OMG!!!!!!!
I had tough feet even before that walk. I was always going barefoot in those days. It was a long walk though. I don't think I could do it today. Fortunately, my parent's house was right near Sepulveda and Ventura Blvd in the flats as opposed to up in the hills.
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I once killed a disheveled drifter. Beat him to death with a Road Atlas. Good times.
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I once comtemplated going to seminary school...
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I once comtemplated going to seminary school...
There is a hidden message here.
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I once killed a disheveled drifter. Beat him to death with a Road Atlas. Good times.
Ridding the world of filthy vagrants is a noble goal. Thank you for your service.
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I was born at a very early age
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I once comtemplated going to seminary school...
What prevented you? King magazine? XXL? Flex? :-X