Hahaha that's cool I don't remember any of it any way!
Stealing Derek's toupee is, however, still stealing! He might go crying to the cops. But once that toupee reaches the complex maize that is the Ohio State campus area, Derek will have no chance of retreiving it...
I can picture it now, just get like 4 dudes all wearing the same shirt but be distanced apart, pull the stalking down over you head, snatch it and make the hand off, He'd just have the WTF look on his face. Don't think he'd get the cops involved cause he's not to bright. If they asked him to put a value on the stolen item his response would be it 3 rimjobs.
You'd seriously be a hero, Especially if someone got it on video.