![](http://www.getbig.com/boards/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=484428.0;attach=533756)
What? Did mummy and daddy not teach you how to tie your shoesies?
You poor little, underachieving, overeating thing, you. I know, shoe strings are a plot by the Illuminati to bind us to their collective will.
By the way, from your bathroom self portraits (you're a regular Ansel Adams in color) it looks as though you're hold more water than a pregnant Blue Whale.