Thanks as always guys and great to see you here wave_length.......it`s been a while buddy.
OK The doc confirmed that I do indeed have Cancer.......a tumor about the size of a quarter on my lower left lobe.
He says he can remove it with surgery but I was quick to remind him that his close friend and associate told me that my lung capacity was so bad that if I layed down for surgery i would never get up again.
I have the worst stage of COPD and any removed lung tissue would just kill me according to the first pulmonary doc I spoke with.
So any way he says lets go for a walk .............so we climb 2 flights of stairs and we`re talking and he says that since I can talk that it`s a good sign.................... I then started to get a bit winded but of course I had a fucking mask on which didn`t help.
So we get back to his office and he says he`s gonna consult with the other doctor and one other doc I saw that ran tests on my lung capacity and then come up with the best plan of attack.
The doc that told me my Cancer was inoperable and that I`d never pull through told me about a ray (not chemo) that was just about 95 % as effective as surgery...............th is doc says if I get the ray chemo has to go along with it......fine with me !!
Personally, and I dont care about what anyone thinks, my white ass isn`t laying down if there is a chance of me not getting back up..............that doc put the fear of God into me.
I think,but I`m not sure, I still respect the doctors opinion of course,but I`d rather opt for a ray that is 95 % as effective as surgery over the surgery itself which I may not pull through from according to that doctor.
So I`m waiting utill he has those breathing test results faxed to him and his consultation with the other 2 docs.
In my heart of hearts I believe ( not positive ) that I`m going with the ray chemo combination cuz I`d like to rise off the operating table like The Phoenix not be zipped into a bag and carried off the fucking table........fuck that noise !!
So that`s it in a nutshell gotta wait for the docs to consult.
Just wanna thank all of you guys as well as Josh ...........you guys have helped to instill confidence in me when I had none at all.
For some reason and this isn`t typical of me under stress I believe I will come out of this alive.
Then they still have to address the tumor in my throat so I have miles to go, but no matter the repercussions I ain`t going out easy and in my mind I intend to be here for quite a while longer whether it be on oxygen or a voice box it beats the alternative.
Life is precious and you never realize just how precious it is until you meet a monster like this and I`m no preacher but if any of you guys still fucking smoke..........QUIT TODAY RIGHT FUCKING NOW !!
Stay safe fellas and thanks again for the constant encouragement it means a helluva lot to me believe it or not.