Anyone who thinks they have to post a photo of their privates on a discussion forum are beyond help! No one can help them. Matt, please completely stop responding to everyone who posts to or about you. That is a good rule for surviving around here.You just dig a deeper hole for yourself and even a team of oxen won't get you out.Walter should be ashamed of what he is doing to an autistic dude. How can any civil person think stirring such people is amusing?
Stop beating around the bush. The topic at hand is Matt's aesthetic cock. Your thoughts please sir.
Great post, but I think love does wacky things to people.I've only *thought* I was in love twice. And I have never been more vulnerable, and never tolerated more abuse from women than I did to those two women who I - for whatever reason - thought I was in love with.The sad thing is, I have met all sorts of beautiful women, but I seldom fall in love. But I guess in 2000 and again in 2018, I did. In the more recent case, I think the reason why it happened was because she misrepresented herself as being an innocent victim of male abuse, and only wanted a nice guy who cared about her, and blah, blah, blah. I later found out that she was addicted to Percocets, and had slept with around 35 guys, at leave five of whom she met on Tinder. What woman would need to use Tinder to get laid?Had I known those things about her, I would have never had the strong feelings for her that I did. But I have to say - having those feelings made me very vulnerable, and that is why I loathe the notion of being in love. It's the very last thing I want to happen to me.
Claims he’s a numerical savant.Measures his dick length to four decimal places (five significant figures).Yet can’t keep straight whether the ex-girlfriend fucked 20 guys or 35 guys while they were dating.
Killer! You really pulled that room together. Love the dual monitors. They make it look like you are really a busy professional.. I am definitely jealous. I gave up the bedroom I planned to make into my office, when I agreed to let my my grandson and his fiance moved in. Right now, my great granddaughter occupies the space. She's almost a year old. She needs the room more than I do. they are only suppose to be here for another year....we'll see.For the time being, I've got a mini-office setup in my bedroom. Fortunately, this room is pretty large. But, having one's office in the room where they sleep is not ideal. For Zoom meetings, I am using the living room because the light is better. Ultimately, I hope to have a bookcase full of books as a backdrop like all the folks on TV do. LOL!
The fuck you mean by having two monitors makes it look like I'm busy?? Of course I'm fucking busy, I work for one of the largest telecommunications companies in the world you crusty bastard. Having two monitors makes it easier for me to get things done instead of flipping from one window to another...that's it. You think you're fucking slick trying to compliment and throw a secret insult at the same time and you've pulled that shit with other people. Next time you run your trap, I'm going to run a choo choo train up your ass. Otherwise, stick to being a closet homo and hang up some coats while you're in there you sniveling little shit
Vince G “run the lip and you’ll get the full clip”
Nor you me.
Listen. The biggest mistake I ever made on here since I came back is messaging you and being nice. All Ive realized over time is that you are a level 100 narcissist who is despised on here. Maybe its old age, but you really like to come across that you are always right and much more intelligent than anyone. You clearly have a tendency towards, Im gonna attempt to not get banned here,,,,,interacting with younger folks. Your calling pillowtalk a character then trying to come up with some reason for it which registers with no one on the planet except you was vomit level. Now you admit you married even though you are a homo? Thats despicable. And the stories of you abandoning your dying wife, multiple people have messaged me proof of it, but whatever, youll deny it anyways. In the end I realize you are an awful person who would never admit to it, but rather live in your masquerade of thinking you are a good guy. The world will be better off when you join your wifeAnd oh, as most people do Im sure you are winding up to tell me what a shitty person I am. Listen grandpa, I know Im a shitty person. I deserve a beating from many people on here. The difference is Im self aware. You are not
I’m visiting New Orleans for the first time and we find ourselves at some dive bar surrounded by black folks. We’re shooting billiards and some humongous black chick starts flirting with me. I mean HUGE. She’s at least 350lbs no joke. Now I’m no prize but I usually date 5s and 6s. This beast was a solid zero. So I’m drinking and flirting back just for fun and before you know it I’m sitting on her lap and she’s now buying the drinks. I jokingly tell my buddy I’m pretty sure this chick is gonna kill me if I don’t fuck her. He says if you do and bring me proof I’ll pay for the flight back to Cleveland. That’s like $120. But aside from the money a part of me starts wondering ‘When was the last time this orca whale got laid?’ I mean she was absolutely horrendous monstrously obese and horribly sweaty and all. And she was being soooo nice to me that I started thinking about it in a charitable kind of way. So I when she asks me to come back to her place I accepted and immediately regretted my decision when we pulled up to what looked like an abandoned home and we had to go around the back and go into the basement where a filthy mattress sat on the floor next to a milk crate. I immediately panicked and thought I was about to be mugged. Then I realized she might be a prostitute and this was her flop house. I tried to get out of it by telling her I didn’t have any condoms and I didn’t want to get her pregnant but this bitch was two steps ahead of me. ‘I’m already pregnant,’ she laughed as she led me by the hand down onto the filthy floor. Did I mention it smelled like raw sewage. I remember it smelled so bad that when I put my face close to her sweaty nasty armpits it was actually a relief. I thought at least she might go down on me and I could bust one and make a run for it but again I was drunk and she was thinking nine moves ahead like Kasparov. So she just casually takes off her sweat soaked purple leggings and black thong and spreads her legs and yells ‘EAT ME, SUGAR!’I was so stunned I couldn’t decide whether to vomit or die laughing. But somehow, I obeyed and began lapping up her puddles of her Denny’s combo of fecal, sweat and vag juice. She came and immediately got up on all fours and shouted ‘NOW FUCK DAT PUSSY’. At this point I believe I was suffering from Stockholm Syndrome and just did what I was told. I’m in her sweaty smelly twat and thinking that since I didn’t serve in Vietnam like my dad, this will be the best war story I’ll ever be able to tell my nephews when they grow up. I’m on autopilot at this point and I figure I may as well fuck her in the ass and cap off the night in heroic fashion so I look down and use every bit of my powerlifting lockout to spread her gigantic ass cheeks to find her asshole entrance. But to my shock and horror she didn’t have an anus......unless.......I reach down below the hood with my fingers feeling around and using my Braille powers find a loose wet dripping pair of wizard sleeves. It hits me like a freight train...I’M ALREADY IN HER ASS. IVE BEEN THERE THE WHOLE TIME. I finish in her ass and collapse on top of her like a baby seal taking a nap on a Sperm whale. When I wake up the sun is up and I ready to make my getaway. But I still need proof for my friend so he doesn’t pull an Epic is Back and stiff me. So I get dressed, grab her thong and stuff it into my jeans and tiptoe towards the door hoping her snoring will cover up the sound of me opening all three locks on the door. Again, I didn’t realize I had fucked Magnus Carlsen. I flip one dead bolt and the snoring immediately stops. I FREEZE. “I know you ain’t stealing my damn thong!”I tell her I was on my way to get coffee and forgot about them and pulled them out and tossed them to her. “if you goin to Dunkin’ Donuts can you gemme three jelly donuts?”Sure I say. I walk out of that dungeon up the stairs and I swear Andy DuFresne had absolutely nothing on me. I jumped for joy and then immediately tried to figure out where the nearest place to charge my flip phone could possibly be. New Orleans is a shithole and I had to be in the shittiest part of the dirtiest city. I finally had to borrow someone’s phone on the street and call my friend to come get me. He picks me up and I tell him the flight home is on him. He of course asks for proof and I tell him to smell my fingers. Not good enough, he tells me. So in the end I paid my own way home but a few months later he finally paid up. AFTER I showed him my positive herpes test results. Solid dude kept his word!
Flame away but I love to show em off!!! I think I have the perfect physique and it has rewarded me well!!
you own a lot of flat billed hats.....dont you?
I’d suck on her engorged clit.
Oh yea? If scientists were to do a dna test on her asshole the only thing they would find is my saliva
I kinda like my (15 years) married life:- Wife is a size 2 hardbody that lifts 4x/week and teaches group fitness 4x/week- Son who is smart (when he isn't a smart ass)- lots of dogs and a cat- 4500 sqft house in the country- 5+ acres of land- Good job- Wife is a good cook and has dinner ready when I get home from work.- Sex on demand- Wife is smart, politically aligned with me, a crack shot with a rifle and would trust to have my back in a foxholeOff the top of my head...
Sounds good! With greatest respect what are you doing here, and why have you amassed 8000 posts....something must be wrong with you
Don't feel bad. I didn't get any love when I called Wiggs this either. Pearls before swine.Melvin, you have as much in common with someone from Nairobi as I have with a Berliner. Nothing at all. You and I have far more in common. And honestly, living overseas is hard, nevermind trying to do it in the third world. Even if by some miracle, at your age, you got over all the hurdles that come with being foreign, being a foreigner every fucking day of your life just gets exhausting after awhile. Do not leave your country. Do not wander the earth like Cain in Kung Fu. The grass is plenty green right where you are, my fat comfortable American friend.
There's no pleasing some people. That's what Jesus said. I've worked in Kenya before, mainly Mombasa. Goodrum will last all of five minutes. As soon as he's squeezed his child-bearing hips into a dashiki and done his best King Jaffe Joffer impression for YouTube, he'll be back.
So will smith 13 year old daughter took this picture with a 20 year old guy in bed and will smith says he allows her to make her own decisions, what say you getbig.
Looks like she needs to move in with her auntie and uncle in Bel Air.
What a load of internet bullshit. Fights and duels and nothing ever comes of it. The only dude with any nerve is Derek Anthony who spit in Goodrum's face because that low life sent G4P stuff to his parents.
fuck i could have been stacking my money by being a frugal bastard and fuck bar sluts thanks to my enhanced muscle massi really fucked up my entire life
there's no dating advice.do the best you can for looks at any time, go clean with good clothes, wash you mouth, put on bit perfume, and thats it.they know within a second if you gonna come any near or not.
COLIN!?!?!?!
Only thing that piece of shit could teach anyone is utter faggory, fucking disgusting aids infested cunt
Well i wasn't going to share this, but i'm bored at work waiting for my last video conference, so here you go.One of the worst experiences in my life, i'm still trying to forget it.This was a little over 2 years ago.I'm doing the online dating app thing, going after single moms and 30-something Latinas with daddy issues. It have been a while since i got laid so i'm fishing a little deeper than normal. This 30 year old mother of 3 who was 5'3" and 130ish messages me, we start talking. She seems decent in her pics, so i ask for a few more. Looks good, but you never know until you peel the cloths off. These Mexican broads can hide fat really well.We chat for a few says, i get her number and call her on a Friday night. She's excited and tells me her kids just "happened" to be with their baby daddy this weekend and she'd like to go out for a drink. She flirts with me pretty hard, so i can tell she's completely DTF, no drinks necessary. So i joke around and tell her i should just come to her place for a drink and then go from there. She accepts, i'm pumped and can't wait to clap some nice Mexican butt cheeks.For those not in the "know" Mexican pussy is like an oven, it's the warmest love pocket you will ever witness. - Just FYISaturday evening comes, she's been sending me flirty texts all day. Asking me if she should even bother wearing anything? So i decide to "pre-game" a bit, make a couple drinks, grab a roady and head for the hour drive over to her place. I'm jacked up on 750mg of Test and 50mg of Cialis, i'm ready to take her to pound town.I'm almost to her house and text her, she calls me and gives me directions to another house a few miles away. Weird. Not to be deterred i carry on, park in the driveway and walk to the front door. She opens the door and to my demise stands a 40 year old 160 pound Mexican Yeti, complete with Sharpie eyebrows and chola gold hoop ear rings. I'm speechless and not sure what to do, before i say anything she says "that profile is my sisters and i have access to it". I'm like "ok where is your sister"? She says her sis is in a relationship, so is unaware of me at all. Then tells me she knew i'd still be interested once i arrived. So i'm not too upset, but really weirded out by all of this. But captain winky is all in so i just play along a little. Start massaging her shoulders, she drinks a glass of wine while i have some gin. Leads me to the bedroom. I notice the house is immaculately clean, not something a lady with kids would have. So we start messing around, i slide her panties off, she's wetter than slip n slide. Has a bit of a gut, nothing too serious, just a big girl. Pull her shirt of and her funbags fall almost to her belly button. She's got massive tittonas of peace, but damn they look like those African ladies in the old National Geographic magazines my dad used to have. I just power through, she gives amazing head and even deep throats like a champion. I considered just busting in her mouth and leaving, but the Gin had kicked in so i was going to have to work for it. She rides me like a stallion and has a few orgasms, i flip her around and clap them cheeks from behind. Then i'm thinking "anal"? So i start fingering her butt with no resistance, so i know she's down. I have her suck me off and get my dick all sloppy, then slide it in slowly. She struggles for a minute and then takes it like a champ. 2-3 minute later i'm balls deep plowing this beast like a pornstar.Here's where the "fun" begins. I'm going to pound town and then hear the front door open and then shut with some muffled voices. I stop pound and can tell she's in panic mode. All of a sudden i feel this warmth around my dick followed by a sandy sensation, it's apparent whatever was in her guts has entered her rectum. I'm panicking. Then i smell this horrible odor, she's leaking out. I'm terrified, she's looking back at me like she just saw the grim reaper. THEN the door opens to the bedroom, there is her 30 year old sister looking all sexy with 3 kids trailing behind her.What happens next is like imagining a 20 gallon balloon filled with diarrhea and compressed air being released. She squirms off me and what can only be described as a "shit sprinkler" starts spraying across the room. It's everywhere! I'm almost throwing up, my lower half of my body covered in shit. Her sister is pushing the kids down the hallway while gagging. The beast looks at me with tears in her eyes, then runs down the hallway to the only bathroom.So i'm stuck in this room, covered in shit and no bathroom. Fuck! So i open the nearest drawer, and start cleaning myself with whatever clothing i could find. Ended up getting most of it off with some t shirts and a glass of water. Now i'm not sure what to do, so i just walk towards the front door. The little sister is on the phone screaming in Spanish to someone. Refuses to make eye contact, so i just rush out the door and jump in my truck. Haul ass to a local LA Fitness (BBing related) to shower.The entire drive home i'm in agony because i left my fucking cell phone at this sluts house. Via online chat she agreed to leave it in the mailbox. So i pick it up the next day. I could see the little sister looking out the window as i took my phone out of the mailbox. What a weird situation. So the beast sends me a message like a week later explaining everything. Those kids were hers and her sister had taken them out for the evening. They came back home early.That house? It was her ex-husbands house. They were staying there while he was overseas. He was in the military, which explained how immaculate the place was. All the cloths i wiped shit on were his.
